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Rated: E · Fiction · Nonsense · #2326425
A mysterious lump appears in the town lake. Written for a Bard's Hall challenge.
After a thorough inspection of Lake Bards (including a top to bottom search in the police department's mini-sub), Mayor Writon stood on the steps of the courthouse and announced the results of the investigation. “Quiet, please,” he hollered. “Everyone just calm down for a minute. Okay, that's better. Now, this might seem a little crazy, but just hear me out.”

He waited patiently through several seconds of murmuring before speaking again.

“Now,” he started, “let me first say that there's no need to panic.”

He had to pause again while a few people panicked and ran screaming toward their homes. Then he addressed those who hadn't left yet.

“That so-called 'Nessie' is not a monster. It appears that James Trundlebutt, if that's the way it's pronounced, but I suppose it might be Trundlebeaut. Anyway, he wasn't happy that swimming is not allowed in Lake Bards after sundown."

"And James just happens to live on a farm, on which one of the family's cows recently died, due to some weird condition that bloated the poor creature up so badly that its insides just burst. So James took it upon himself to drag the carcass down to Lake Bards on his father's tractor. And apparently that blob that used to be a cow just started absorbing water and bloating up until it looked like a dang sea monster."

"Now, I've spoken to James, and have given him two options: get that thing out of Lake Bards before the annual carnival, and by whatever means possible, or spend a week in the county lock-up.”

At this point, one of the town's citizens shouted, “If he goes to jail, just who's going to get that thing out of the lake?”

“We're working on that,” said Mayor Writon. “If anyone has any good ideas, I'm happy to listen.”

“People are going to see that disgusting lump from the Ferris wheel,” someone called out.

“And they're going to smell it, too,” someone else added.

“Good point,” said Mayor Wilton. “So I think there's only one solution. Everyone start praying for rain.”



Sentence count: 24
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