My ex and his accident settlement

My ex-husband is abusive and I did not deserve to be treated like a piece of property. He acted like he owned me, like I was supposed to be his slave and do whatever he wanted me to whenever he wanted—especially after we got married. He thought that gave hin the right to tell me to do anything and I was supposed to do it out of "love". But I never loved him at all. I just felt obligated to care for him after his accident. I thought if I abandoned ship after that then I would seem like a rude and awful bitch so I stayed and looked after him like a caregiver. It was never a relationship based on love and mutual respect. He had zero respect for me. He may have said to his friends how much he respected me, but his actions never matched his words. It was all just empty platitudes so he would seem like the "good guy". There was zero substance behind the "nice things" he said about me in front of other people. He was rude and disrespectful to me all the time and treated me like trash. He wouldn't even let me sleep at night if there was something we were "discussing" that I was not "seeing his way". It was a long and awful dysfunctional relationship based on obligation to take care of someone who was not able to take care of themselves. It was a long time to be abused and controlled and constantly intimidated and spied upon. He would hide behind doors sometimes and spy like a creep. I couldn't even play a video game online and chat without him getting jealous. He didn't understand why I would want to play a video game and interact with others on missions or while having a fun PvP match of Destiny whrn I could just "talk to him". But there was never a two way conversation. It was just him talking at me about what he thought. He didn't care what I thought or felt about anything unless it coincided with what he believed or if I said something that he could use to make himself look better or smarter about a subject.

I stayed initially because I felt bad for him because he had no one to help.him after his accident and he couldn't afford a nurse as all he did was drive a taxi and made less than minimum wage. So I naturally stepped into a caregiving role because that was what I was conditioned to do throughout my life from my grandparents to my mother. It was what was expected of me from my family and then from my previous "relationship" with my ex boyfriend, Ryan.

I tried to leave many times, even before we were engaged, but he would convince me to stay. He would argue in circles and be relentless with his "reasons" and demands until I agreed to stay. That is the same way he "talks" to people about ideas and subjects too. He never really listens, he just waits for his turn to talk more. You can barely get a sentence out when you have a "conversation" with him. He's a disgusting fucking old asshole who stinks like fucking shit and thinks the world fucking owes him. He is a crybaby who is over 65 years old and still blames his fucking parents and cries about how he could have been a hockey star if only his parents hadn't split up
He takes zero responsibility for himself, his actions, and his life. It is always someone else's fault when he gets mad or when anything happens that could put him in a "negative" light. He's the biggest fucking gaslighter I have ever met, perhaps other than my ex-boss, Dr Wilson.

He's also a total fucking liar and scammer. He lied to ICBC and played up how bad he was injured and how bad it would affect him so he would get more money for a settlement. He rejected their first offer and then got a lawyer so he could go after them for more money. He lied and said that his tinitus and hearing loss was due to his accident from hitting his head on the pavement, but it was a pre-existing thing from skydiving when he got smucked in the head by a bird while free-falling. He was already half-deaf and had a ringing in his ear before he ran into the lady's car who was turning left onto the highway from Millstream. Also, he had smoked weed prior to getting on the motocycle so he lied about his fitness to operate a motor vehicle safely.
Also, he smokes weed every day before work and has for years. He smoked weed on his taxi even during his shift and that was long before it was legal. That is why he always wears sunglasses. So people can't tell he's stoned 24/7 from the time he wakes up to the time he goes to bed. He has smoked weed every day before going to work at Butler Bros Concrete too.

I never took any money from his settlement. He invested it all and I left all that to him in the seperation agreement. Also, I never asked for any part of his pension or any other benefits from what he is entitled to via Butler Bros Concrete even though I was legally entitled to ask for half, but I didn't want anything from him at all. I just wanted to be free of his disgusting greasy ass and sex-crazed controlling clutches.

He is actually officially been diagnosed by a psychiatrist and has been prescribed medication to treat his bipolar disorder. This was all discussed in the transcript of his ICBC settlement case as they had access to all his medical records. I sent my aunt a copy and asked her to please save it as I was pretty sure it would become important evidence after I left him. When you leave abusive controlling crazy people, they don't like to let go and let you live your life. They like to make it seem like they are the innocent perfect one and the person who left is crazy and why would they leave such a perfect marriage where they were put on a pedestal and treated like a princess and got everything handed to them and got waited on hand and foot, but his family knows the truth. He claimed the same shit with his ex-girlfriend, who does, or used to, work for Shaw Cable. She (K.McK) knows he is batshit crazy and has a sex/porn addiction, among other issues. She can testify to the psychiatrist and all that. They even used to own a home together in East Sooke.

https://www.writing.com/main/books/entry_id/1043149-My-ex-husband

https://www.writing.com/main/view_item/item_id/2305615-The-Message