Neighborly

Robert thought they would become friends when Al moved in next door. He seemed like a decent guy, at first. As the weeks turned into months, Robert grew to like him less. It wasn’t just one thing that rubbed Robert the wrong way, it was everything.

First, there was placed on the side of the garage two days after Al moved in. For years, the enormous mirror next to the garage reflected sunlight through Robert’s bedroom windows, sometimes blinding him. Al was either too lazy to throw it away or an idiot. It was a toss-up. The following incident unfolded during a peaceful dinner. When the shouting started, Robert had just sat down to eat, prompting him to go outside and investigate.

He stepped out on the porch; obscenities were flying, and a large man stood at the driveway as Robert walked across the grass. Al’s wife ran out.

“Please, make him leave,” she begged, tears trailing her face.

“What seems to be the problem?”

The other man turned toward him, sparing a glance. “None of your damn business.”

That remark didn’t sit right with Robert, so he moved toward Al. He didn’t take kindly to strangers, creating havoc in his neighborhood. So he stepped between the men, just as the fists started flying. Al is screaming, the other man is yelling, and Al’s wife is grabbing Al by the hand and trying to drag him back into the house. Robert took the brunt of that, with a punch to the arm that missed Al’s face.

Al and his family had a bad habit of overfilling the garbage can with loose items, the can tipping over frequently as its contents always seemed to find themselves in his yard. He was tired of picking up after them. That can would sit at the curb all week long until the day before garbage collection.

But one incident made them enemies and to this day, they still haven’t spoken.

Robert headed to the garage and started his tractor, ready to cut the lawn. He kept four barrels to dump the grass clippings in and would set them out on the curb that night for pickup the next day. When the three bags filled, he drove over to the empty barrels, ready to dump the grass. The first barrel he discovered was full. Heavy black garbage sat in it. He took the lid of the second one, the same thing, then the third and fourth cans. Looking over at Al’s yard, he realized that his lawn company used all of Robert’s barrels after they cleaned up next door.

Anger shot through Robert like a bolt of lightning. No way would he put up with this, having people come onto his property and use his garbage cans felt like a violation. Robert removed every black garbage bag and carefully stacked them in Al’s yard. Surely his neighbor would understand what the worker had done was wrong and he’d apologize.

As Robert finished cutting his lawn, Al and his wife pulled in. They waved at Robert, who walked over to speak to them. He needed them to know what the company they hired had done and ensure they never did it again. It went beyond rude and laziness as far as he was concerned.

“Hey Al, Lisa.”

Lisa smiled, grabbed two bags from the car, and headed toward the house.

“So neighbor, I wanted you to know what your lawn company did the other day,” Robert began.

Al seemed puzzled. “What they did?”

“Yeah, when they did the spring clean up, they dumped all your debris in black plastic garbage bags.”

“Ok,” Al said.

“And then they dumped all those bags in my yard waste barrels. So I wanted you to know so you can tell them not to do that anymore. I put all of the bags over here on your side.”

“You did what?” Al shouted. He marched toward the bags in question, at least ten stacked in a neat pile. He stared at the garbage in disbelief. “You had no right!”

“I had every right. They had no business being on my property and using my cans without permission.”

Al picked up one of the heavy bags and tossed it across the invisible property line. “You have no right putting it on my grass.”

Robert marched to the bag Al had just tossed into his yard, picked it up, and tossed it back. “This garbage belongs to you!” he yelled.

“How dare you,” Al shouted, bringing Lisa running to see what the commotion was all about.

That had done it. “How dare me?” Robert bellowed. “Your workmen disrespected me. Now you’re doing the same. Stay the hell off my property.”

Robert headed toward the tractor, ready to go inside and calm down, his heart pounding so loud it was as if a freight train was heading straight for him.

“Eat shit,” Lisa screamed.

Robert stopped in his tracks and spun around. “Me?”

Lisa crossed her arms over her chest and nodded.

“Yep.”

Robert refused to deal with them any longer. If that’s how they wanted to treat him, then he would ignore thme and move on. He went to the tractor, cranked the engine to drown out the incessant screeching of Lisa and Al, and went about his day peacefully.

WC: 894