where you learn what it means to be human, and how inadvisable it is. |
Online registration forms are a source of great peril. my tentacles punch inaccurately at the teensy keyboard, and i fill in part by part, did i....? what is the....? how long is.....? do you own a...? are you the vessel of a....? conveniently, some elements of the quastionair are little, tiny squares, that i just have to push. and somehow never get pushed because they are dependent on other things getting filled, things that you didn't know were required. then i submit, only to get a glaring notice, usually a hurtful blood red sign that there was something that i, in my imbacility neglect to answer. but i don't neglect things. those 'neglected' questions never existed before i submitted. obviously once you answer them, other fields become blank and you must start a new process of mental anguish, cursing yourself humanity and the cruel designers of the form most of all. perhaps there is a professional out there, he only does registration forms. he is the one that makes new qustions pop up at the fifth submission's failure. he is the one who greedily rubs his hand every time you have a 'field required' arrow, showing you that you must state to which branch of the ingernal legions are you enthralled to (and you must mark something). it's abhorid. it's heinous. and in the end, you know that the connection will time out, juuuuust when you thought you were all done. there. and then you forget the password!!!! |