They Won't Be Missed

Sam Adams was a public prosecutor in the Bay Area. He was in charge of prosecuting the January 6th protesters and other alt. right militants including self-described patriots, proud boys, and the boogaloo bois. He considered them all to be neo-Nazi scumbags and felt that they would not be missed by anyone if he put them all away.

His task force had the evidence and was prepared to prosecute them all, throwing the proverbial book at them. He denounced them all as a white supremacist and held a press conference to announce the latest indictments.

He went on to describe how he and his staff have been threatened with death for standing up to the neo-Nazi movement. He was particularly offended by their openly embracing Hitler and Germany, particularly taking offense to a vile video making the rounds titled “Hitler was right, Death to the Jews”.

That night he received the latest death threat while sitting at home with his African American wife enjoying a Passover meal as he and his wife were observant jews.

He picked up the phone

Sam Adams?

Yes

“You are so dead; MF jew loving anti-American scumbag Look outside.”

He looked out his window and saw men carrying torches lighting a swastika chanting ‘Death to Jews”.

Whoosh went the impact of the bomb which blew down his door killing him on the spot.

Thus ending his latest crusade against the evil of the alt. Right.

The former president issued a statement later that night,

Calling his assassination the actions of God-fearing Christian patriots.