The new neighbor seems a little...strange. |
“Hey, there, Little Red Riding Hood. You sure are lookin’ good.” “The name’s Debbie. And that is the worst pick up line I’ve ever heard. Not to mention you totally plagiarized it from Sam the Sham and the Pharaohs.” “Um, you’re everything that a big bad wolf could want…” “Seriously, you can stop now.” “Little Red Riding hood, I don’t think little big girls should go walking in the spooky old woods alone.” “Do you see a red hood on my shoulders? And what woods are you talking about? This is your front porch. Look, it was nice to meet you and I hope you enjoy the cookies but I need to go.” “Just to see that you don’t get chased, I think I outta walk with you for a ways.” “No, no. I’m fine. I can make it next door on my—hey! Get your hairy mitts off my arm!” “I’d like to hold you if I could, but you might think I’m a big bad wolf, so I won’t.” “Why do I always get stuck living next to the creeps? You know what, buddy? Two can play this game. Ain’t no man gonna invade my territory. There ain’t nobody out there gonna mess with me! Yeah, that’s right. A little Hank Williams, Jr. for ya! Now let go of my arm before I bite your hand off.” “Owwooo-ouch!!” “I warned you! It’s getting late. I’ll just be on my way before you do something that makes me regret welcoming you to the neighborhood.” “Beware what stalks you in the night...” “Metal? Seriously? That kind of music is just...ug. Nails on a chalkboard, you know?” “...beware the she-wolf and her bite!” “Welp, ya found me out. Now you know why I’m not afraid of the big bad wolf. Don’t go getting any ideas, though. We may be two of a kind but as good ole Hank crooned, I’m a lone wolf and I ain’t never been trapped. So you just stay on your side of the fence and I’ll stay on mine, savvy?” “Baaa-baaa!” “That’s what I thought!” Music Sources ▼ Those Other Things ▼ |