Souless

My chest is beyond heavy. My brain constantly aches and hums, replaying over and over again being on my hands and knees, begging God no. I've lost everything within 32 days. My baby, my amazing boyfriend, my home. On top of losing my soul, the only way I can describe it.... the love of my life, my rock, can't even look at me because all he can see is the future we lost. Our child. Everything is gone and it's hard to wake up. If breathing didn't come naturally I don't think I'd have the will to make myself. I didn't think it was possible to break anymore until he said he was done. I truly didn't think it was possible to hurt worse than I all ready had been. I didn't think any more tears could fall. How can you lose everything? Absolutely everything in a little over a month. How can you breath and feel like your chest in caving in crushing your lungs? The sound release from your throat as you cry out doesn't even sound like you... it's raw and agonizing.