Letter to women

There’s no such thing as another person being the one. You have to love yourself more than the other person. This doesn’t mean be completely selfish or love the other person in a lesser way. This means if he’s consistently making you cry, leave. If he can’t stay loyal or is always lying, leave. Enjoy your own company. Enjoy your own happiness. We give men way to much power over us. I watched a girl throw away all her family and friends over a man who can’t be bothered to be there for his 5 children. I saw a girl post tons of suicide posts over a relationship that didn’t even last a year and this dude constantly switched women after proposing to them. I know it hurts. I once was so convinced a guy was definitely the one that I gave him over 2000 worth of money only for him to lie to all my coworkers and leave.
I was once told by a cousin I shouldn’t be so picky.
I was once told by my father guys don’t stick around if you don’t put out.
I was told by my first boyfriend who put down everything that made me happy that no one would ever love me like he did.

After the guy who was a pathological liar I decided I didn’t want to date anyone. I was going to focus on my goals and happiness. I was going to be single for a minimum of a year and whoever wanted to date me had to meet ALL of my standards. Anyone who tells you that’s to much to ask and unrealistic or snobby can take a hike. Learn to be 100% happy with the idea of being by yourself so that when a decent person does come along you’re not wasting your time trying to change for someone else.
When my current person came along and asked me out, He had really good vibes. I told him I didn’t want to date anyone. So if he actually was interested beyond my looks we could try being friends. HE HAD NO PROBLEM WITH THIS.
I fully expected to never hear from him again after that because most men aren’t interested in friendships.
He texted me the next day.
I expected him to try to get sex because that was my experience. FOR OVER A YEAR HE DIDN’T TRY TO GET ANYTHING.
I was the one who initiated.
For me I liked him enough to try to be fuck buddies. I wanted to see if he’d still be respectful afterwards.
HE CONTINUED TO BE RESPECTFUL AND INITIATED HANGING OUT OUTSIDE OF SEX.
A year later we were officially dating. We still are 3 years later.
Another rule; if they break up with you and you love them do not continue having sex with them. If they’re genuinely serious about being friends after (a lot aren’t) do not give them sex and let them do most of the initiating. Hooking up with someone you love will not only mess with you but won’t get him back. Keep your power.
As women we need to pull up our standards and keep our power.