recycled souls await birth in the soil

I confused love with hard work.
always waiting for the axe to fall
Belief can close your eyes
and force your hands

And drinking can make u forget how thirsty you're getting
If I weren't lonely, I'd miss the clarity of solitude
You asked if I ever cry
Crying is just suffering with a question mark
and insanity is fear inherited

I'm grateful would the pain, now
At least hurt less than it did before
But those compromises pile on
The urgency of joy's instinct shrugged away
With fingers crossed for a cosmic do-over
But time is not for sale
Even though everyone's buying

In all of us is the feeling that:
When the meteor spring cleans
Its a familiar memory, a lost friend
like clarity in calamity (aksndnrjejiSJWSKADJFLAKJDW)
Maybe I just want a small patch
Of grass and a tall fence
To sleep under the stars

And a bulldozer.

It's a trite, crude joke, whatever it is
that allows us to trample towards blood-lust
And only feel regret if we're the loser.

You'd be a better parasite if u made me happier
I grit my teeth when u twirl ur hair and speed in the car
I wish we could all see through each other
And weep for each other's lies one last time
But our recycled souls
Await birth in the soil