Move Along Please

I have a coworker who happens to play the same online game as me and thus finds it necessary to relive the minutia of his in-game progress to me each day.

As I sit and "uh-huh", "oh" and "cool" my way through each daily session, in my head I'm pleading with God to shut him up and move him along. "I play the same game, dude", "shut-up, please, just shut-up" and "God, please have mercy on me" are some of my thoughts, while tales of his latest in-game adventures are prattled endlessly at me.

Typically this takes place within the first hour of my being at work each day when I'd rather be almost anywhere else, like prison, tied to railroad tracks or chewing glass at a recycling plant. Thoughts of sticking an ice-pick in my ears begin as he drones a relentless verbal assault like a barrage of artillery fire at a foe who has no option but surrender and accept the consequences of defeat. So I listen, I nod, smile and suffer silently.

Today though I stumbled on what I hope will be a permanent solution. I've found out the best way to get be released from his daily thesis was to start talking about my own interests and game experiences. The response was tangible, his eyes glazed over and suddenly his cell phone required his attention and he was quickly on his way, no doubt to his next verbal hostage.