I Believe

Since the beginning, mankind sought importance. The urge wanted to be remembered through, perhaps, a legacy. We labeled those we remembered as ‘famous’ or ‘unforgettable’ by the acts they portrayed. Columbus finding America, Washington as our first president, Alexander Gram Bell creating the telephone. The deeper we looked into ourselves, the more we wanted to be who we are.
To be accepted by society these days, we buy the latest clothes, hairstyles, posting pictures on social media. Girls slap on chemicals to develop a mask hiding their true identity and boy’s, confused of who they are and who are silently judging them. We are hiding our flaws, imperfections, and identity. I believe in finding yourself.
It usually starts in the teenage years but the urge came early for me. I was eleven, just starting fifth grade in a new place. The fear of judgment wrapped around my neck like a leash. After weeks of silence, kids started coming up to me asking me questions, pressuring me to join them for lunch. So I did; I studied them like monkeys from afar. The more perfect I became, the more friends I gained. The next thing I knew everyone knew me. I held my perfection with me through middle school, but at times, it would peel off me like snake skin, oozing flaws from beneath, scaring people away. Deep inside the oozing monster covered my flesh, blinding my vision of positivity to negativity and filled my ears with tricks and lies. Though I let it cover me, I forced a new layer over it, to hide it. Like a butterfly's cocoon, this layer was strong and tough. It gave me a chance to start over without mimicking women on magazines and wanting to feel important from other people. I moved again to a new place and my new layer glowed.
I found myself in art and in my animals. Finding my inner spirit scattered on paper and the freedom of riding my horse. Just feeling the wind against my cheeks and her strength below me, makes me feel have control of any direction I take.
I found myself in rude jokes and happiness by the friends who don’t get offended of the mistakes they make and the joy of spending time with others. Those who accept who I am by my personality than looks. I found importance on my own, instead of people telling me things I should believe.

I still have my old friends from middle school judging me for becoming a ‘cowgirl’ or changing my ways. Though I don’t have as many friends as I did before it’s okay because I am happy, happy that I found myself and my own personality. In today's society everyone seems to be walking robots, dressing, acting the same. It’s so stressful worrying about what other people are wearing, thinking, acting. The urge is so strong, it pulls you with chains when you can just break free.
To be yourself.
To create or find something extraordinary based on what you believe.
To create your own legacy and believing in yourself.
That's what I believe.