The Drakes of Heaven and Earth: #5E

The wizards enter the Fairy Tail guild hall.

Erza Scarlet:[Kicks open doors] Is Master Makarov here?

Mirajane Strauss: Your finally back from your island getaway! So how was it? Did you have fun?

Magma Scarlet: It was work, not a vacation...

Cana Alberona: Hey, Mira? Where did you get this beer? It tastes the same as before, but it must be spiked with something, because I swear I see two...[Sees Erza and Magma.]Erzas!?!

[Dead silence filled the hall, as the wizards notice two of their guild's arguably strongest female wizard, instead of one.]

Fairy Tail: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!! TWO ERZAS!!! IT'S THE SIGN OF THE APOCALYPSE!!! MAGNOLIA IS DOOMED!!! WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE!!!

CA: Damn...Maybe Macao's right...All this drinking isn't making death seem fun...

Elfman Strauss: Everyone! Evacuate the town! Warn the citizens! WARN ALL OF FIORE!!!

MiS:[In her primary Satan-Soul form, yet scared.] Don't worry little brother! I'll protect you!

Romeo Conbolt: Come on dad! We gotta go!

Macao Conbolt:[In crutches] Go on without me son...I'll just slow you down...

RC:[Crying] I'm not going to leave you dad!

MC:[Tearing up] I know son...I know...Wakaba! Take Romeo and get the hell out of here!

WM: It's been an honor...old friend...[Drags a bawling Romeo with him towards the exit.]

Alzack Connell: Bisca...If we're gonna die today...I need to tell you something...

Bisca Mulan: Yes, Alzack?

AC: Well...I...I...I...love-

Clay(ton) Grimm&Griffin: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA...
AHAHAHAHAHAHA...BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Gray Fullbuster: Man...Did we act like this when we saw Magma!?!

Natsu Dragneel: I sure hope not...

Griff: Haha haha-*Crack!* Oh!...My back!

CG:[Settling down, getting concerned.] Griffin!?! You okay buddy!?!

Griff:[In pain] Yeah...I'm fine...*Groans*...My back's just acting up...

Lucy Heartfilia: Hey, Griffin? Are you okay!?!

Happy: You look like you're in a lot of pain.

Griff:[Heavy breathing] Just the curses of old age...

LH: Really!?! How old are you?

CG: I...think he's...seventy...three?

Griff:[Resets back] Seventy-four...*Snap!*...At least I think so...us exceeds aren't very good with the human concept of time...When I left Edolas eighteen years ago...I was still in my golden years...

Fairy Tail: Holy-moly! You're-

Griff:[Interrupting] I'M WHAT!

Fairy Tail:[Cautious] Y-y-you look good for your age!

Hap: Geez! Your pretty old Griff!

Griff: If I wasn't in so much pain...I'd feed you your own wings...

ES: Everyone![Points to Magma.] This is Magma Grimm-Scarlet...Our daughter!

Magma Scarlet: Hi! Nice to meet you all in person!

Fairy Tail: Your daughter!?!

CA: Geez, Erza! You and the new guy weren't even gone a week! How's that even possible!?!

CG: I'll explain...When Erza, Griff and I were sailing to Galuna Island, Erza said she wished there were two of her to bring them back...So, I used my magic to create her with Erza's help! She's kinda like our daughter in a sense...But don't worry! She's not going to kill you all...Unless you piss her off, maybe...

CA: So...Are you and Erza a thing now, or...

CG: Only time will tell...For now...we're just parents!

ES: Now that's out of the way...Where is Master Makarov?

MC: He went out of town for some kind of last minute council meeting or something like that...he's been gone since yesterday.

Hap,ND,LH,GF:[Relief] *Whew!*

ND: Well that was a close one!

GF: Yes! We won't have to deal with "That" until gramps comes back.

Hap:[Weeping with relief] Oh, Thank goodness! I wasn't ready to stare into the face of death! I still have eight more lives!

LH:[In fear] I can't stand it anymore, you guys are really freaking me out, how's he gonna punish us? I can't die now! I'm still young, and I still have so much to look forward to!

ES:[Commanding] ALL OF YOU, SHUT UP!

Hap,ND,LH,GF:[Huddling in fear] AAAHHH!!!

ES: Do you know when the master will be back

MiS: No...but I would imagine he would be coming back anytime now.

ES:[Turns to others] Alright, listen up you fools! Your not getting off the hook! You broke guild rules by taking on that S-Class quest! Prepare to be punished!

[Natsu and Gray hold each other in fear.]

LH:[Panicking] How do I prepare myself, when I don't know what's gonna happen!

WM: Well...It was nice knowing ya! *Sighs* It's a crying shame...Those two boys are one thing, but I can't believe Lucy's getting punished too...Oh, you poor girl!

LH:[Warily repeating] You poor girl!?!

ND: Hey man! How come you don't feel sorry for us, huh!?!

GF: Why you lumping me in with this loser!?!

[Fight between Natsu, Gray and Wakaba breaks out]

Griff: Such disrespect for their elders...

CG: The hell's their problem...It's their own fault they're gonna get punished...Wakaba's just pointing out they should've known better...

ElfS: A big part of being a man is owning up to your actions...You hear that you two!?! It's high time for you to man up!

Hap:[Crying] It's not fair! I'm the cutest one here, so how come know one here feels sorry for me!?!

LH:[Frightened] Would somebody, please tell me what's gonna happen to us!?!

CG: Man...You guys are such whiners...you make Romeo looks like a grown adult...

ND&GF: WHAT DID YOU SAY, FREAKY EYES!?!

CG:[Angry internally, nonchalant externally.] Oh, I'm sorry! What I meant to say was...[Makes a functional megaphone from his right hand, speaking into it.] YOU GUYS ARE SUCH WHINERS, YOU MAKE ROMEO CONBOLT, A SIX YEAR-OLD, LOOK LIKE A MATURE ADULT!!![Let's megaphone crumble.] I'll give you wizards twenty seconds to get as many hits as you can...*Thud!*

ND&GF: THAT'S TWENTY SECONDS MORE THAN WE NEED!!!

[After twenty seconds of being unphased by the two wizards attacks, Clay grabbed each of their forearms.]

CG:[Dead serious] That's twenty...Now it's my turn...Earth Dragon: Volcanic Fists![Instead of Clay's typical Tectonic Gauntlets, these gauntlets are molten hot, capable of burning even a pyromancer like Natsu. Since they are molten, they lose most of their impact, in exchange for thermal damage and subduing properties.]

ND: Hot! Hot, hot, hot! Ha-ha-hot! Why does it burn so much!?!

GF: What are you complaining about, firebreath!?!

CG: Earth Dragon: Volcanic Solder Smash![Clay then grabs them both by the heads, then smashed their heads together, sticking them both together with the cooling igneous rock.]

[Natsu and Gray then stumbled around together, unable to free themselves from one another's heads.]

RC: Woah! That's so cool! I didn't think geomancers could use lava!

CG: Sure we can! But I'm more than your average geomancer...I can control both the living and non-living things of the earth! It's probably the most versatile element you can learn, but also the most complex...But you seem like a bright kid! Maybe when your older, you'll be able to use both fire and earth magic! I'll even teach you some volcanic magic!

RC: Wow! Really!?! Natsu never bothered teaching me any magic! You ARE cool!

CG: Your wrong kid...[Picks up Griffin to put him in his hood.]...WE are cool! Just ask me in a couple of days...l still need to settle and furnish my new house...And if I'm not there, you can always ask Clairissa Suede!

RC: Who's that?...

CG: She's kinda like Magma over there, but she's more like my sister...After all...That's the name my mom and dad wanted...for...my...sister...before...nevermind...

RC: Well, how is your family?

MC: Romeo...[Nods to Natsu.]

RC:[Realizing what his dad's hinting at] Oh...my bad...

[Some time later. Natsu and Gray see an odd request on the board.]

ND: Hmmm...That's one creepy looking job request...

GF: That's for sure...

Loke:[Walking towards them] You guys are back, what's up?

ND: Not much man...What the heck!?! I can't even read it...

LH:[Slides in next to Loke] Read what!?!

Loke:[Freaked out] *Woah!* Your back too Lucy!?!

LH: Jeez, it's real nice to see you too!...What is your problem with me?

Loke:[Stammering] I-Uh-Eh-I-Uh...Nothing![Runs right into Erza.]

ES: No way![Loke gets knocked to the floor.] You will not be taking any requests!

LH:[To Loke on the ground, sarcastically] Real smooth...

CA: Do they have to be so noisy?

RC: Who cares? They're like the coolest!

CA&CG: You're kidding me, right!?!

CG: Look kid! You shouldn't look up to such idiots like them...It took them idiots two hours, just to get their heads unstuck...and me and Elf had to help them...Besides, you got Griff and Nidhogg to look up to anyways...

Reedus Jonah: Wait a second! Are you Nidhogg! From the Drakes of Heaven and Earth!?!

CG: Yep! Totally forgot to mention earlier...That and to actually move in to our new home...

Fairy Tail:[Murmurs rumors about Nidhogg and the Drakes.]

ND:[Reading the request]
Decipher this text and I'll see you'll
Increase your wealth by 500,000 jewel!
This one sounds like a winner to me,[To Happy] what do you think!?!

Hap: Sure does!

GF: So it's a translation job!?! That's a weird request for a guild...[Sees text]...Wait, that's some kind of crazy, ancient stuff...No one's gonna be able to read that!

Hap: Hold on! It's written in modern letters too!

ES: I thought I told you, No jobs!

CG: Shouldn't you guys be doing something else, besides taking any old dumb jobs!?!

ND: Oh yeah! Like what?

CG: Oh...I don't know...How about making a case for yourselves!?! From what the locals said, you saved their hides before we got there...not that any old magic can kill demons in the first place...but still, if you can tell Papa Mak about how you saved an entire village, he might loosen up on the punishment...that's what I'd do!

LH: That's...actually not a bad idea!

GF: Yeah...It's downright genius...

CG: Really!?! It's common sense!

ElfS: Well "common sense" isn't exactly part of their vocabulary...

ND: Whatever...While Lucy makes a case for us, I'll see if I can do this really quick...[Reads modern letters.]

ND: Oh yeah, I can totally read that! Lets see...Uugo deru rasuchi borokania...What the-That's crazy!

[Changeling activates.]

MC: What's going on?

WM: That's just sad...Those kids are so scared of the master's punishment, they're actually sweating rainbows...

MC: That's enough booze for you...

[Changeling ends.]

LH:[Now in Gray Fullbuster's body] *Shivers* So cold...

ElfS: What!?! Ice wizards don't get cold ya big crybaby!

LH:*Shivers* I'm serious you guys, would somebody turn up the heat before I freeze to death in here! Pretty please!

GF:[Now in Lucy Heartfilia's body.] *Uh!* What the-What's going on! My chest feels really weird all of a sudden, like it's heavy! My back's killing me...

CG:[Now in Griffin's body.] *Groans* I know what you mean...My back feel like it got ran over by TERRA in her Magic-Tank form...

Griff:[Now in Clayton Grimm's body.] Weird...Aside from feeling much heavier than usual, I feel fine...Great in fact!

MC: Hey! Are you feeling alright Lucy? Your voice seems awfully low...

LH: What are you talking about I--[Sees her body.] WHAT THE!?!

ND:[Now in Loke's body. Still on the floor.] That's weird...I don't remember lying down on the floor like that...

Loke:[Now in Natsu Dragneel's body.] Hold on...I thought I was on the floor...[Sees Gray in Lucy's body.] *Screams!* [Runs out of the guild hall.]

GF: What's your problem!?! You can't face me Dragon Breath!?! *Uh!* Why do I sound like a girl!?!

MC: I'm no doctor, but I'd say it's because you are a girl...

ES:[Now in Happy's body. Firm and composed.] Why is everyone acting so foolishly!?!

Hap:[Now in Erza Scarlet's body.] Oh wow Natsu! Check it out! Huh!?! Where did he go?

ND: I'm standing right here![Unaware of the tinted glasses.] Why is this place so dark!?!

Hap: I could be wrong, but I don't think I've always had these.[Grabbing both breasts.] Have I? Have I?

[While the men are gawking over Happy's actions, Erza is shocked, and attempts to attack Happy in her body.]

ES: Why you!!!*Clank!*[Erza is stunned from kicking her armored chest.]

Hap: And I got cool armor too!

ES:[Falls to the ground. Disappointed in herself.] I don't understand what's happened to me!?! I've never felt so tiny and weak before. It's like I somehow requipped into...a cat...

CA: Why do they have to ruin my quality drinking time?

RC: There so cool, they couldn't ruin anything!

CA: That's, kinda their thing...

Fairy Tail:[Dumbfounded]

LH: Okay, I'm starting to get really freaked out! First I'm totally freezing, and now theirs a creepy look-alike of me!

GF: What are you talking about!?!

ES: How can you be such an idiot! Don't you realize what has happened to us!?! We've all switched bodies!

Gang: What!?!

ND: Stop fooling around Happy!

ES: I'M ERZA, YOU DIMWIT!

Hap: If your gonna yell at me Loke, do it to my face!

ES: SILENCE!

LH: You mean...

ES: Yes, Natsu and Loke, Gray and Lucy, Clayton and Griffin, and worst of all, Happy and I, we hav all switched bodies!

Gang:[Shocked] HUH!

Hap: Why is switching with ME the worst of all!?!

Grant Chanty:[In Magma Scarlet's body, but due to the fact that they're both Human Golems, Grant retains his masculine body and voice, but his height, skin tone, hair color, and everything else are the same as Magma had it. Same thing with Magma, who's now in Grant's body.]
Where in the blazes is my fiddle!?! John? Mary? Captain? Where is it![Looks around Fairy Tail.] Where in the sam hell am I? And why am I wearing a woman's blouse and a mini skirt!?!

Gang: Magma!?!

GC: What!?! Are you all blind!?! It's me! Grant!

ES:[Weeping] Oh, no! My sweet little baby girl has switched bodies too![Grabs Grant.] Grant! Where was the last place you remember being in?

GC: Hang on...[Reforges some pants, rips of his blouse.]
...Now...the last place I remember is being on The Flying Exceed, docked at Hargeon...While we were turning in the gold, and buying citrus so we don't get scurvy...I was keeping the crew entertained...OH NO!!!

ES&CG: WHAT!?!

GC: Me shirts and doublets are at the town's laundromat!

ES&CG:[Realizing what he was saying] Meaning...

[Meanwhile, in Hargeon harbor.]
MS: Huh!?! Where am I?[Sees she's back at Hargeon, on The Flying Exceed.] Why am I back here? Why do I have a fiddle in my hands...AAAHHH!!! Where's my shirt!?! It's really nippy out her...Huh!?![Sees the rest of the exceed crew.]

Exceed Crew:[Gawking over Magma's familiar voluptuous body.]

MS:[Embarrassed] AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!!!

Little John: Oy, all you scally wags! What you rubbernecking over!?! Haven't ye all see a woman's body before? Show some respect and avert ye deadlights! On the double!!!

Exceed Crew: Yes, quartermaster John, sir!

Jonesy the Helmsman: Captain Havoc, on deck!

Polly:[Flies down from her Crow's Nest] Good to see you, Captain! Huh? Charlie!?! Why do you look like a lassie!?! And why are ye knickers out and about!?!

Captain Havoc: Oy! Men! Instead of staring at the lassie's boobies, help me with all this booty![Carts carrying pallets of jewels are shown behind him.]

Exceed Crew: Ay Ay, Captain![The men rushed over to load the billion in jewels.]

Polly: Quickly lassie! While the others are distracted! I'll take you to me nest![Grabs Magma, starts flying towards her nest.]

MS: Ummm...Auntie Mary!?! Are my boobs suppose to bounce so much?[Sees other harbormen gawking at her.] AAAH! Why are they staring at me like that!?!

Harbormen:[Gawking at Magma.] AAAAAH!!![They scattered as Polly was throwing her cutlasses like throwing knives at them.]

Sting Eucliffe:[Wolf whistle]
Rogue Cheney:[Blushing] Wow!

*Bam!* Pow!*

Victoria Marvell:[Draging the two unconscious twelve year-olds] You two perverts!!! We're going back to the inn, NOW!!![Heads back into town.]

Lector: Hey! Wait up!
Froshe: I'm coming too!

[The five of them head back to town.]

Polly:[After putting Magma down in her lookout nest] Here we are![Rummages through her stuff. Pulls out a choir blouse.] Here ye go lassie![Hands blouse to Magma, who then puts it on.] It's a good thing I held on to this blouse...
[Back at Fairy Tail.]

Master Makarov Dreyar: The ancient Unpula Spell has been cast...You kids aren't feeling like yourselves today, huh!

ES: Master, your back!

ND: Gramps!

MMD: I had noticed that request on the board...by reading what was written on that page aloud, you've casted a spell of personality transference, and that spell, is called "Changling"

LH:[Scared] That sounds scary...

Griff: Yet...you did nothing about it...[Under his breath.]Such a GREAT master we have...

GF:[To Natsu as Loke] So your really Natsu, right!?!

ND: Uhhh...Yeah?

GF&CG:[Grabbing Natsu] YOU IDIOT! What did you do to us!?!

ND: ME!?! All I did was try to read the stupid job request![Still unaware of the tinted glasses.] Would somebody please turn on the lights!

MMD: That's enough Lucy and Griffin...Uh, Gray and Clay...For wizards, this spell does more than switch your bodies...It switches magic as well!

Gang:WHAT!?!

[Somewhere in Magnolia.]
Loke:[Out of breath] Oh, man! It kinda feels like somebody just poured lava down my throat...Huh![Notices two beautiful, young ladies.] Hey, is it hot out here, or is it just you?
[The young ladies runaway as Loke subconsciously breathes fire.]Huh!?![Notices he's breathing fire. Freaks out.] What's happening to me!
[Back at Fairy Tail.]

MMD: There's one thing you should know...

Gang: *Gulp!*

MMD: If the Changeling Spell is not undone within thirty minutes from the time it was initially cast, you will never return to the way you were before...or so says the legend at least...

Gang: 😧

ND:[To Mirajane] Do you know how many minutes we've been mixed up for!?!

MiS: Sixteen...So you have fourteen left...

ND: Gramps! Isn't there a way to lift the spell and change us back!?!

MMD: Hmmm...Since this is such ancient magic, it would only stand to reason that I... don't know...

Gang: AAAH!

MMD: I must say, I'm disappointed, I was so looking forward to punishing you, but it looks like you've got your hands full...best of luck to you kids!

Gang:[Dumbfounded]

GF:[About to strip out of Lucy's top] Alright, that does it! I can't take this anymore!!!

[The men of Fairy Tail are ready for this display.]

LH:[Stopping Gray] Get a hold of yourself!

GF: Let go!!!

CG: Geez...Save it for your bedroom you two...there's a kid here!

GF&LH: WHAT'S THAT SUPPOSE TO MEAN!!!

Griff: It's quite obvious that you two are in an "active" relationship...

GF&LH: NO WE'RE NOT!!! WE AREN'T EVEN A COUPLE!

CG: I may not have my Seismic Sense...but even I could see through that lie...

GF&LH: WE'RE NOT LYING!!! WHAT MAKES YOU THINK WE'RE A COUPLE IN THE FIRST PLACE!?!

CG&Griff: He strips...she has a whip...It's not that hard to piece together...

ES: Hmmm...Never thought of it like that before...now I can't stop thinking about it!

MMD: Well now that it's out in the open, I can't think of it as anything else...

CA: Well Gray...Never thought I'd see you in such a "physical relationship"...besides Natsu of course!

[Meanwhile, somewhere in Fiore.]
*Shatter!*

Sol: Juvia mon ami! Is everything alright!?!

Juvia Lockser:[With a crushed tea cup in her clenched fist] I have no idea Sol...It's like there's a disturbance in my heart...Like the love of my life is being taken from me...by a blonde witch!

Totomaru: You had that dream again, didn't you?

Juvia Lockser: Yes...I don't know what's wrong with me...

Aria: Don't worry my dear friend! When we return to HQ, I'll personally ask Master Porla to give you some time off to yourself! All you need is a little break, then you'll be all better!

Juvia Lockser: Maybe your right...we have been on the road for a bit longer than usual...Thank you Aria! I'm glad to have friends like you all!

Totomaru: Sure thing...just try not to break anymore tea cups, okay?

Juvia Lockser: Okay...I will.
[Back at Fairy Tail.]

Hap: So...Even though Gray's in Lucy's body, he still likes to take off his clothes! So that means...

ES: That means, what!...NO HAPPY!

Hap: This'll be awesome! Here I go!!!

ES: Happy![Happy starts a Requip spell] Stop this at once!

Hap: Requip! Check me out you guys! Yaaaaay!...Fun!
[Now wearing a swimsuit uniform with her hair in pigtails.] Tada!

ElfS,WM&MC: WOW! ERZA LOOKS SMOKING HOT!

GC:[Reforges Heaven's Wheel Armor, but it's made for a male figure. Holding blades to them with telekinesis] IF YE ALL KEEP STARING, IT BE THE LAST THING YE ALL EVER SEE!!!

ES: HOW DARE YOU!!!*Clank!*[Falls to the floor.] No...This can't be...I was an S-Class wizard and now I'm so weak...

Hap: Man...I was trying to change into one of those cool suits of armor she has...Hey, Grant! How come you can use her magic so well as Magma, but I can hardly use it as Erza herself!?!

GC: Don't ya remember anything, tomcat! When miss Scarlet and I did that blood oath toproclaim me as her son, we did more than shed blood on one another. She also gave me access to her being, so me and Maggie would be full-fledged siblings! On top of now having her magic and memories...though I don't seem to be as proficient with it as me sis...speaking of sis, I wonder what's going on over yonder?

[Back at Hargeon Harbor.]
CH: So...let me get this straight...The pink-haired buffoon read an incantation, which caused a spell called "Changeling" to affect several of ye guild's wizards, including you and Charlie!?!

LJ: And ye all have less than fifteen minutes to return to ye own bodies...

MS: Yes...That's correct...but we're so far, and have so little time...I'm afraid I'll be too late...

JH: Well...their might be a way...

CH: Jonesy! It won't work! It hasn't worked in over a score!

MS: What!?! What wouldn't work!?!

LJ: Well...This vessel is called The Flying Exceed for more than it's name...Years and years ago, it was capable of actual flight...and it could fly faster than any seacraft could sail...even putting birds in it's dust!

Polly: But it hasn't worked since well before I was hatched!

JH: But she be a Grimm! Maybe there be something she can do to fix it!

MS:[Sensing nothing out of the ordinary with the ship] I don't sense anything wrong with the ship...

Polly: That can't be![She flies over to the ship's wheel, hovering right above it.] There's gotta be something around here to get this thing airborne...*Click!* Aaah![Polly landed on her butt against the wheel, which was now level with the ship like a pedestal, after attempting to perch on the wheel.] Oy, mates...I feel all...tingly!

[Before she said those words, the ship was shaking notably.]

MS: Maybe it needs someone who knows Aera Magic...like an exceed! Aunt Polly! Try flying now!

Polly: Ay![Struggling to summon her wings.] I...feel...something...but me wings aren't coming...HUH![Polly was oblivious to the fact that her efforts caused the ship to float high above the harbor, taller than any building that was in Hargeon.]Haha! Check it out mates! I'm flying a ship! I'M FLYING A SHIP!!!

CH: Good on you Mary! Jonesy! Set a course for Magnolia!

JH: Ay, Captain!

CH: Johnny! Have the crew batten down the hatches!

LJ: Ay, Captain! All right men! Ye all heard the captain! BATTEN DOWN THE HATCHES! ON THE TRIPLE!!!

Exceed Crew: Ay!!!

CH: Maggie!

MS: I know...[Pulls out Grant's fiddle.]Time for a shanty!
[Back at Fairy Tail.]

ND:[Realising] I see! We switched our magic with each other, but other than Magma and Grant, we all stink at it!

WM: Hey Loke...or whoever's inside him...

ND: Geez, it's me, Natsu! Okay!!!

WM: Have you figured out what kind of magic he uses?

[Natsu looks dumbfounded.]

ElfS: Yeah, come on! Be a man, kid! Show us!

ND:(I dont know...I don't feel anything happening magic wise...everything just kind of seems...fuzzy...)Errgh! I don't think i can take this pressure anymore!

Loke:[Running back in, drooling flaming saliva] Hey you guys, you gotta help me!

MC: What's with that fire?

ElfS: It's like he's drooling...

MiS: Well that's certainly not threatening...

ES:[Enjoying Happy's Aera Magic] *Sigh!* I must admit! Flying is way more fun than I thought it'd be...

CG:[Also enjoying Griffin's Aera Magic] Me too! It's like swimming...but in the air!

ES&CG:[Snapping out of their daze] I shouldn't be wasting my precious time like this! I need to be changed back at once!

LH: *Sigh* What are we gonna do?[Drools ice like an Ice machine.]

MiS: Hey Gray...or...Lucy! Your dropping ice, huh...

LH:[Covering Gray's mouth] I hate this...Why me!

Levy McGarden: No need to worry, Lucy!

[Team Shadow Gear is at the guild doors.]

LH: Levy, it's you!

ND: L-levy!

Droy: The Shadow Gear team is here to save the day! You guys will be back to normal in no time!

Jet: Oh yeah! We got this, no sweat!

Jet&Droy: Now! Do your thing Levy!

MiS: When you boys say "we" you really mean her, right?

Jet&Droy:[Embarrassed chuckle]

LH: You're so sweet to help us!

LMG: Anything for my girl! Besides...[Whispering] I wanna read your novel...and it'd be kinda weird to talk about it with Gray...

Griff:[Overhearing their conversation with Clay's 6th sense. Whispering] A novel she says...

CG:[Whispering] Hmmm...A Celestial wizard, and a writer...interesting...

ND: What are you gonna do!?!

LMG: Well I do know a thing or two about ancient texts...I'll start by taking a look at what was written on the flyer itself!

CG: Wait a minute! Griff! My goggles! Why didn't I think of this before!

Griff: Of course![Pushes Levy out the way.] Stand aside. With these goggles and my own vast knowledge of ancient text. I should be able to decipher the message, and hopefully, find a way to fix the spell.

ES,LH,GF,ND&Loke: THEN WHY DID YOU WAIT SO LONG TO DO ANYTHING ABOUT IT!?!

Griff: Be quiet! My memory hasn't been the best with age...Now...Why did I NOT do anything before...

ES:[Tastes a bite out of a slice of strawberry cake.] *Bleck!* Why does this taste so damn bitter!?!...Must be due to Happy's fishy taste in food...

Hap: What are you talking about!?! It's always tasted like that!

[Griffin should up from his taken seat. Realizing why he stalled with solving the flyer.]

Griff: That's why!...Happy, my boy! Since we're both in human bodies, we can finally taste sweetness!

Hap: Really!?!

Griff:[Takes him by the hand] Yes, my boy! Let's go! We have a whole new taste to explore!

Hap: Aye, sir!

[As they were about to skip out of the guild hall, hand-in-hand, Clay call out.]

CG: HOLD IT YOU TWO!!! INSTEAD OF JUST GOING AROUND TOWN, GRABBING CANDY AND PASTRIES, WHY DON'T YOU JUST MAKE SOME GOLEMS TO DO IT FOR YOU WHILE YOU STAY HERE!?!

Griff: By the time I figured out to do that, we'd all be out of time! See ya![Thy proceeded out of the guild.]

CG: GRIFFIN!!! AT LEAST LEAVE US MY GOGGLES!!! *SMACK!* [Fulfilling his last wish, Griffin threw the enchanted goggles at his former face.] Thanks...Here Levy! Use these instead! These are capable of 64x gale-force reading![Tosses them over to Levy.]

LMG: Woah! 64x!?! With these I should be done in no time!

ES: So, on top of functioning as binoculars and judgement vision, they also can be use as Gale-Force reading glasses? Just what else can they do?

CG: Pretty much anything you'd need! Magic Radar, Infrared, Nigh-vision, and Vitality Analysers.

LMG: Wow! These must've costed a fortune!

CG: Not really...My Valkyrie caretaker Adrianna made them for me. She's the best crafter in all the world! Because she was taught my ancestors...She's kind of like my aunt...Except she's a giant woman!

RJ: I've heard rumors of the Valkyries beauty. Are they really true?

CG: Fellas...Imagine the hottest girl you know...then double their hotness...then scale her up to be a giant...Every. Single. Part of her...that's how hot the Valkyries look...because of that, I can't even look at the most drop-dead gorgeous women in the world and feel attracted...even if they're o natural, form...

Fairy Tail Men:[Imagining the Valkyries, rubbernecking over their mental images.]

WM: You gotta take us some time to meet them Clay!

CG: You probably shouldn't do that...The Valkyries have zero tolerance for perverts...[Shivering] The things they did to me...the things they made me do...Because of them...they broke every perverted desires I had as a teenager...practically castrated my mind...I can't even look at a ladies assets without thinking back to being crushed by the Valkyries gigantic asserts...[Holding Mirajane for comfort.]

MiS: Awww! You poor thing...[Hugging Clay in Griffin's body. Petting him.]

LH: Wait!?! Are we all just gonna believe him!?! Need I remind you, he can see everything from kilometers away! He's probably lying through his teeth!

LMG: He wasn't Lu! These goggles are saying he was completely honest...poor guy...

LH: Really!?! That's sort of a relief...I feel sorry for him though...

Griff:[Returning with Happy with wagons full of sugary food.] Yes...If the Valkyries don't cure the perverts they come across...They enslave them, in indentured servitude!

Fairy Tail Men: STILL WOULD BE WORTH IT!

CG: That's where your wrong you guys...Hey! Did you use my money to buy all that crap!?!

Griff: Yes...I'll reimburse you of course...Now child...Let's eat!

Hap: Aye sir!

[They take an entire table to themselves, gorging on the sweets.]

Griff:[With Clay's mouth full] Mmmmm...So good! Eat your heart out Panther Lily! Your not the only exceed to taste sweetness![Continues eating.]
P.s: Yes. Griffin knows Panther Lily. Will elaborate in the Edolas Arc. As far as I know, he's the only exceed capable of tasting sweetness.

Hap:[With Erza's mouth full] By the way...I think everyone in town thinks you two are a couple now...[Continues eating.]

ES&CG: YOU IDIOTS!

LMG: Wait! I can't be distracted! I've gotta flyer to decipher![Uses the goggles to decipher the flyer.] Okay...Uugo deru...

Loke: Please hurry! There's only twelve minutes left!

GF: Hey...you sure it's safe to read the words out loud like that?

LMG: Don't worry, it's totally safe as long as you don't read everything in the correct order...now...

ND: THERE'S NOT MUCH TIME! *Ugh!* I can't take it! I feel...so weird! Change me back!

Hap:[Finishing up his feast] Awww! I don't think it's so bad...I got to enjoy some delicious sweets! Now...One more time! Re-

ES:[Interrupting] I SWEAR YOU'LL LOSE A LIFE, CAT!

[Levy closes her book.]

LH: So how's it going Levy!

ND: Have you figured it out!?!

LMG:...No, I'm stumped!

Gang:[Disappointed] Aaaaahhh...

ES: Oh no...I never thought my fate would be to live out my days as some strange, flying cat...

Hap:[With a whole mackerel in Erza's mouth] What's so terrible about that, huh!?!

Griff:[Also with a mackerel in Clayton's mouth] Nothing is wrong with that...She's just sulking...

CG: Seriously! Would it kill you to scale the fish before eating it!

GF:[Grabs Lucy's blue top, ready to strip it off]

MC,WM&ElfS: 😮😮😮

LH: I TOLD YOU NOT TO DO THAT!!!

ND: *Ugh* I feel so funky...

Loke:[Drooling fire] The girls are never gonna talk to me now...

RC: I wanna switch with someone!

CA:[As she drinks an entire barrel of beer] Not with me kiddo, I'd die if I was underage...

LMG:[To her worried guildmates] Look I know you guys are freaking out, but I'm still working on it, okay!?!

ND: How much time do we have?

MC: About ten minutes...I hate to say it, but you might wanna prepare for the worst...

[The gang looks depressed]

LH: Oh no...

[Meanwhile, Shadow Gear's other two members were cheering their leader on.]

Jet&Droy: GO! GO! GO LEVY!

WM: Those guys are just her personal cheerleaders!?!

LMG:[Analysing] So "deru" is...Oh, I see! That must mean...

CG: You know what! Screw it! If I'm in someone else's body, I might as well see how it is to get drunk! Mirajane! Hit me with two dozen beer barrels! Cana! Wanna have a drink-off? Winner gets a billion jewels!

CA: It's your funeral Clay...

MMD: Mirajane! Make it three dozens! I want in on this drinking game!

CG: I don't even care if I win or not...I just at least wanna get buzzed! Griff starts acting like an actual house cat when he's hammered!

Griff: I do not!...And who's billion jewel do you plan on wagering!?!

CG:[Mockingly] I'll reimburse you of course!

[Two minutes have passed.]

GF: So what happens if we end up getting stuck like this?

ND: Huh? What do ya mean by that?

LH: Are we just gonna adjust to our new bodies and go back to work?

ND: Well yeah, I guess we'll have to, it's not like we have a whole lot of options...

Hap: Whatever happens is totally fine with me! If I stay quiet, everyone will be nice to me, because I'm scary now!

ES:[Annoyed] What?

LH: Well no one asked for your opinion, did they! STUPID CAT! I just wanna be a cute girl again...[Lucy and Loke simultaneously drooled their new elements together.]

ND: Are those frozen chunks of drool!?! That's so gross man!

LH:[Upset] I'm not a man! And I know it's gross! You think I'm doing this on purpose!!![Shocked look]

ES: What is it Gray?...Uh, I mean Lucy...

LH: I just realized something...If we get stuck like this forever, none of us have a clue how to use our magic anymore...If we did take a job, we'd never be able to finish it!

ND: Aw geez, your right!

GF: We stink...

ES: And that means...

Gang: We're the weakest team in Fairy Tail now!

[Moaning in helplessness.]

ND: Uhhh! What's the point of living if I can't burn stuff!

ES: I am an S-Class wizard and I refuse to be part of the weakest guild! If only I wasn't trapped in this form...

Hap: You're mean! I don't know what you're complaining about, I loved being a cat![Jumps in attempt of flying away.]

*Tink!* [Erza moans in pain as her formerly armored body crushes her frail new exceed body.]

MC: Just what were you trying to do there Erza?...Uh, I mean, Happy?

Hap: Ever since we've switched, she's been saying mean stuff! So I got mad and tried to fly away...but I couldn't fly away...'cause I don't have my wings anymore!

ES:[In pain] I-I'm sorry I was mean! I promise I'll be...😵

LMG: Yes! That's it!

Gang: Huh!?!

ND: Really!?! So you can lift the spell!?!

GF: Come on! DO IT!

LMG: This is what it says...May this eternal exchange provide you with eternal happiness...kinda cute isn't it?

LH: Awe, yeah it is...

Loke: May this eternal exchange provide you with eternal happiness...huh...

ND: Yeah, and!?!

LMG: In other words, everyone who's been switched by the spell will live happily ever after! So lucky! I'm so glad I figured it out!

ND: OH, NO WAY! ARE YOU TELLING ME WERE STUCK LIKE THIS FOREVER!?!

GF: We wanted you to lift the spell, not read it...remember?

LMG: *Gasp!* Oh that's right...Sorry...

LH:[Reassuring Levy] You've got this. I have faith that you can do it, but you've gotta work a little faster, 'Kay! Maybe there's some kind of code, or hidden message in the words, you know, something like that!

LMG: Yeah, good idea!

Jet&Droy:[Cheering] GO! GO! GO LEVY!

WM: Isn't all that racket gonna distract her?

ElfS&GC: Na...They're just trying to get her pumped up, and they need all the help they can get!

WM: Huh!?!

Jet&Droy:[Cheering] GO! GO! GO LEVY! Yeah! Wooow!

LMG: Uh...I'm still not seeing a pattern here...It doesn't seem to make any sense! *Groans*

MC: Five minutes left...

LH: FIVE MINUTES! Uhhh...

ES: Well this is it! For the rest of my life, fish for breakfast, lunch and dinner...I've...worked so hard...And now I'm going to spend my days chasing mice and little pieces of string![Flies into a corner

Loke: No, Wait! Come back here Happy...I-I mean Erza!

Hap:[Apologizing] Sorry I got upset! I know this is hard on both of us...

ES:[Turns to Happy] Really? You do?

Hap: Now's not the time for us to be arguing like this! Will you please forgive me?

ES: Yes of course! I hope you'll forgive me too!

Hap:[Presenting a very large fish] Aye! Here's a little something to make you feel better!

ES: A fish! I-[Snaps out of her daze.] Don't want it![Flies away again.]

LH: Can you be anymore clueless?

ND: Have you figured it out yet?

MC: The situation is dire, with just five minutes to go!

ND:[Mad] I don't recall asking you for the time, so shut your trap, 'Kay!?!

MC: Geez...I was just trying to help...

LMG: Okay...I think I've almost got this last part figured out...

[Levy is being cheered on by Jet and Droy, as well as Elfman and Grant.]

GC: Don't worry guys...this Fast-Tempo Magic song should speed up all our perception of time...giving us all faster processing![He strums a fast-tempo tune from the magic guitar he made.]

ElfS: Work it Levy! Yeah! Your on FIRE! Wooow!

WM: He's too good at that...

MMD:[Borderline drunk] Still trying to break the spell, are you?

GF: Look! If your trying to teach us a lesson here...We've learned it already, okay!

MMD: Oh!

ES: Yes Master?

MMD: Nope! Nevermind kids, I'm drawing a blank!

GF:[Threatening to strip] Aaaaah! We're not gonna make it!

LH;[Restraining her old body] Taking off my shirt isn't gonna change anything Gray!

GF: LET GO OF ME!

MC: You guys have two minutes left...

MMD: I just remembered something about the spell!

ES: What is it?

MMD: While it can be lifted, I'm afraid it must be done one pair at a time...meaning it's impossible to change you all back at once!

[While they argue about who should be switched first, Levy solved the flyer.]

LMG: I got it!

MC: 61,60...

LH: Alright! I'll try and explain this really fast!

MC: 57, 56...

CG:[Angry cat growl]

ND: No time! Just change us back! Hurry!

LMG: Okay here it goes...[Repeats]Aruboroya tesura rugi gouu!

[Clayton is back in original body, but everyone else is switched with one another, including the new arrivals from The Flying Exceed.
As everyone was freaking out, Clay shouted.]

CG: Everyone...QUIET! I can fix this...[Focuses the Moon Magic he gained from Luna.] Moon Dragon: Vapor Fog![Clay released a thick fog of Moon Vapor from his mouth, covering everyone in it. Sapping most of their magic, but dispelling Changeling, Returning everyone back to normal.]
MAN...That's gonna be crazy useful from now on! Hahaha...ahaha...😵

Griff: Well...It looks like he over-exerted himself again trying to use Moon Magic...[Grabs Clay.]Grant! Magma! Help me carry your father to our new home...

GC&MS: Yes uncle Griffin!

Polly: Oy! Tomcat! Can me and Charlie stay with ye two at your quarters? Captain Havoc said we might stay a few nights in this town...

Griff: Sure thing Polly.

Hap: Oh! Wow! Your Love her! *Choking!* [Griffin actually feeds Happy his own wings. He can still summon them again though.]

ND: HAPPY! Why you...*Crash!*[Polly dropkicks Natsu into a table, knocking him out.]

Polly:[Changing back to her exceed form] Thank you Griff! But I like being called "Molly" when I'm on land for a while.

>> To be Continued >>