Surprise

Astonishingly, Conner O'Malley was getting married.

"The world is a huge place, with many beautiful women" he told his friends, "I could go my entire life with a different girl every day."

He liked to tell stories of his exploits. His friends' wives despised him.

Finally, in his fifties he met the woman. Nothing he hadn't had eating out of the palm of his hand before, his friends speculated, maybe it was just time to settle down? Her enormous wealth helped.

The stag party would be epic, no expense would be spared.

His personal goddess for the evening was stunning. With long, glossy midnight hair, almond shaped green eyes, skin like mocha satin, and a body too perfect to be real, she fit his tastes. She was the headliner.

The party started early. Swanky restaurant, bar hopping, then the final destination.

The best man raised his glass. "Tonight, Connor lives like a King, for tomorrow he lives like a prisoner!"

The partygoers roared with laughter as decorative women brought trays of drinks and table dances. Finally, it was time for the main attraction.

"I'm a slaaaaave for you" played as the goddess emerged from behind the velvet curtains. She descended the stairs like a tigress, heading toward Connor lounging upon his throne.

The air was sucked from the room as she stopped in her tracks.

"DAD?!? Oh my GOD!" she shrieked, covering herself as best she could. She ran sobbing up the stairs and disappeared.

Stunned silence filled the room. Connor looked green.

"Well. THAT was a surprise." croaked the best man.