Missing

You had been ill for years now, dying for months it really was inevitable. Is that a heartless thing to say? Is it terrible that I felt a sort of schadenfreude from all of this, is it terrible that I haven't told anyone? Is it sad that I talk to you when I don't know what to do?

The concept of ‘missing’ has always been with me, I've 'missed’ people and I've been 'missed’. I've cried myself to sleep countless times missing people, and yet all these people were never truly missing they were always a phone call away.

But you, you're not even missing you're worse than missing, you're gone.