Happily Ever After

"Yer late," I glowered at the young man standing in my doorway.

He shuffled from one foot to the other, cap in-hand, uncharacteristically nervous.

"Yer here about a woman, ain't ya?" I sneered. The man's chiseled jaw dropped open in surprise.

"How did you know?"

I rolled my eyes, "That's what yer always here fer."

I gestured to the chair across from my desk and opened the folder while he got comfortable.

"I've got the perfect mark fer ya, today. Her name is---"

"Is this safe?" the man interrupted. "Because last time I nearly died fighting a dragon." He crossed his arms over his muscular chest and frowned.

"This one's easy," I assured him.

"Yeah," he snorted, "that sounds familiar…"

"This one," I pointed a stubby finger at my paper, "is lyin' in a glass box in the woods. She's waitin' fer a kiss to wake her up."

The man narrowed his eyes. "Is that all?"

"Well…"

"I knew it!" His scabbard clattered against the desk as he jumped to his feet. "If there's another dragon--"

"There ain't!" I scowled. "My sources say she's guarded by seven little fellers."

"Right. And…?"

"And…her stepma's a real witch."

"Can she turn into a dragon?"

"The princess? Don't every woman after marriage?" I chuckled.

He blinked at me and I coughed the laugh away.

"Look, I've got another one here who just needs ya to find her lost slipper. She's got two ugly stepsisters…"

He shuddered, "I'll take the one in the box."

He took the file and I took his gold.

I smiled to myself as he mounted his white steed and galloped away.

Every broad wants her Happily Ever After and I was more than willing to give it to them…for a price.