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by Espero Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E · Poetry · Contest Entry · #2098490
Don't Feed The Birds Unless You Know What You're In For
Merit Badge in Comedy
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   Congratulations on the third place win at  [Link To Item #hpc]  for your poem:  [Link To Item #2098490] . Thanks for making me laugh and keep writing the funny stuff! *^*Bigsmile*^*  ~Lornda


I lost my sweet dog one July day.
My heart was broken, what more can I say?
I vowed no more dogs would enter my door;
After all, they were quite a chore.

Not to mention the sorrow of losing a friend,
One who was faithful, right to the end;
Always waiting with a look of concern,
Each minute just ticking until my return.

I didn't expect to feel such a void.
My eagerness to come home was destroyed.
There must be a way to fill this need.
I wanted something to care for, and feed.

And then an idea! I'd feed the birds.
They'd only need food, no loving words.
Still, it would give me some satisfaction.
Provide for me a needed distraction.

I went to the store to buy a bird feeder
and seed so they could have their dinner.
I sat by the window, waiting to see,
If the birds would eat what was left by me.

It took two days, and then they came.
I bought a bird book, found each had a name.
It was fun to see them gathered there.
Watch them appear out of thin air.

What is this? Surely it can't be a bird!
No, a squirrel's in the feeder, oh my word!
He was sitting there looking proud and grand,
As corn twisted and turned in his hand.

I was speechless, and yet it was so darn cute
That I didn't have heart to give him the boot.
I watched him leave but soon back he came,
Almost as though he were playing a game.

He gave not a fig for the birds who were gone,
But I missed their beauty and sounds of their song.
Once again to the pet store for a squirrel proof device.
Now I hoped birds and squirrels could get along nice.

You guessed it, now the trips to get feed,
Include sunflowers, berries, suet, and seed.
Peanuts were added, ones in the shell,
Unsalted; the squirrels loved them so well.

Greedy little fellows, they seemed quite tame,
And soon I was calling each by its name.
I could sit on the deck and they'd come up to see,
If today they would get a peanut from me.

One evening, right before dusk set in,
I looked out the window and stifled a grin.
There by the feeder were a rabbit and bunnies
Eating the seeds; it was so cute and funny!

Day by day they were all eating more,
I was off once again to the darn pet store.
One day I thought, “This is out of hand,
There are squirrels and rabbits galore on my land.”

A streak caught my eye as it ran off one day,
I wondered what critter had now come to stay.
Alvin and the chipmunks, just what I'd feared,
This was all getting crazy and weird.

Could each one of them have called in a friend?
Now what should I do? Put this all to an end?
I didn't yet, but one day shouted, “I'm through,
My yard's now known as a Critter Zoo.”

I'm getting a dog, I decided today.
He'll rule the yard, chase them away!
I've learned my lesson, let them be;
After all, they were created wild and free.

Now Roscoe and I sit on the deck.
I watch Mother Nature and say, “What the heck,
A dog's what I needed all along,
A man and his dog, together belong.”

3rd Place Winner in Contest
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