Life's Lessons

Life’s Lessons
By: authorattract

      Would we ever truly know the real meaning of life? When I was younger I didn’t think so; maybe when we were done with this life, our creator would tell us. Or maybe life wasn’t supposed to have meaning and we were just insignificant blobs. I hadn’t even hit puberty yet when I think I found a light at the end of the tunnel. Let me tell you about my journey to realization.
      My parents got divorced when I was 7. This shattered all knowledge my two brothers and I had about love. Tears were now daily, we saw struggling single parents, and broken hearts. Our lives were suddenly ripped into two. Two houses, two Christmases, and two new lives. We weren’t the same close-knit family we used to be. I was alone, constantly in my room; either crying or sleeping. What was the meaning of life, I said? How can life be so cruel and ruthless to people who just want happiness?
        I was 10 and it was time to go to the pediatrician for an annual check up. The doctor told me to bend over and touch my toes and she noticed something wasn’t right with my spine. Several X-rays later I found out I had severe Scoliosis. This is a deformity of the spine that makes the vertebrae form an “S” shape. I was told I needed to wear a hard plastic brace for 22 hours of the day. It went from the bottom of my collarbone down to my butt. It conformed to my body; squeezing me so tight it was hard for me to breath and I couldn’t bend over at all. I was basically a robot. Kids in my 5th grade class poked fun at me. They made rumors such as I threw up blood, or I was highly contagious. I was so self-conscious at such a young age. I kept thinking to myself, is this all that life is going to amount to? A daily struggle to stay afloat a troubled sea?
      My home situation never got better, if fact, it got worse. When I got to middle school tensions rose between my oldest brother and my mom. My brother started skipping school and running away to my Dad’s house thirty minutes away. He kind of gave up on life. Everyday would be a verbal battle between them over the littlest stuff, and my mom would end up crying. During some of the arguments the result would be a phone call to the police and some fake apologies. During all of this I would be in my room frozen with fear that every time, the brawls would become physical. Life sucks, I would think, and from my point of view now, it did seem like it sucked.
      I was in my room one day, thinking about my family situation and my deteriating health. I realized life would never get easier. Either I find a way out of a miserable life, or just end it all. I sat in my bed, thinking for hours; crying. I have been going through life without purpose or reason. Just one foot in front of the other, taking the punches as I go. I then realized, maybe it’s not my life that is poor, but my attitude. If you have health, family, or social obstacles in your life, can’t sadness be dodged by just being happy? I thought it was impossible to just “be happy” especially through horrible times, but why? Why can’t we smile when our health sucks? Because we might die? Or because life isn’t perfect? Or why can’t you throw on a smile when you only see your father three times a week? I’ll be seeing him less when I’m off to college. A bird must depart from her nest sometime. I just might’ve taken flight early.
      It was through all of that pain, all of the suffering that I sort of had an epiphany. Life sucks, and it will only continue to suck.  That might be the meaning of life. Life sucks and then you die! But here’s the catch - it’s your attitude throughout all of the sucking that defines your life. Everyone has a sob story, and they all have had things that shaped their life. But others chose to ignore the negative and magnify the positive. They choose to focus on the bright future ahead of them and see how minute their current situation is. Laugh! Sing! Dance! Life is awesome if you try and avoid seeing the negative in things. Try and see everything as a positive. It will be hard at first. Living in a life that really is unfair and stupid is reality. But you have total control over your state of happiness. Take control today, and see your life in a whole new light.