Only Ever Looking Back

-Only Ever Looking Back-
by Keaton Foster



Did you see that
There
Behind me
That creature
Such impossible features
A terrifying being
From my past
Only ever looking back
I see nothing ahead
Nothing to come
All that I see
All that I really know
And live to understand
Is back there
My long lost mother
And a vacant father
All of my tortured siblings
Those now dead
Or eternally missing
For a man
With such a large family
I am and have always been
By myself
Completely alone
So does this charade go
I walked along
Whistling my song
Pretending to be
What I clearly am not
All while looking to the past
I can’t change it
Of course not
Nothing can change
What was done
And what has become
It’s pointless to try
Foolish to imply
Only ever looking back
I see what’s there
What I left behind
Creatures
Monsters
An impossible darkness
Perpetrated by a family
Those that should have
But I fear did not love me
They hated me from the get
I was a mistake
Or so the tale told plays
I am a product of sin
A once cheating mother
Finding the arms of another
Escaping the nonexistent father
Of a brewed of nearly a dozen
Only when she was caught
Only when she confessed
Did the darkness of who I was
Fall down like a million bricks
Only then did I become
Who I am
I was not meant to be
A sin forced into belief
Only ever looking back
Is all that I now have
There is nothing ahead
No future filled with content
An existence not worth a thing
Did you see that
There
Behind me
That creature
Such impossible features
A terrifying being
From my past
The more I run
The more I fight
The closer it becomes
Someday soon it will catch me
Someday soon it will devour me…



Only Ever Looking Back
Written by Keaton Foster Copyright © 2014.