IF I WERE A WOMAN!

IF I WERE A WOMAN!

By CHUKWUMA CHRISDON ATTAH

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WOMEN BE WISE! PLEASURE LURES! FASHION NEVER EXTINCTS!

If I were a woman, I will be wiser, because of my peculiarity. I will be true to my heart …..knowing that my heart is more fragile than the men’s. If I were a woman, I wouldn’t have several “mumus”. I wouldn’t count men as mumu1, mumu2, etc. I WILL COVER MY NAKEDNESS, AND OPEN MY HEART. I will guide and sentry my feelings. If I were a woman, my body I will preserve for the best man in the world, my hubby. I wouldn’t sleep with men just for cash. Cash disappears. It flies to God knows where. If I were a woman, I wouldn’t be sore and insulting…..I will humble myself, believe in my dreams and myself. ….knowing that any height men attain, with little more efforts, I’ll equal. I wouldn’t stand on the streets at nights, only for men, big belly men, to price me for sex. I wouldn ‘t be cheap. I wouldn’t be stupid, nor bear the name “run” girl. I wouldn’t be “sharp”, nor bear the name ‘sharp girl”. Because most “runs” backfire and odd sharpness always destroys. I wouldn’t love him because he’s got swag. Swag, I know can’t foot bills, nor put food on the table. I would rather look through nature’s eyes to see what the future holds for him, and the propensity of having a fulfilling destiny in his abode.



If I were a woman, I will be a woman of substance. I will equal the achievements of Dilmal Rousseff, Meg Whitman, Tory Burch etc. I wouldn’t be fast to tell a man, I LOVE YOU, or make him know what I feel for him, lest he takes me for granted, abuse my feelings, and take advantage of me. Neither I will die with that feeling. Rather than uttering those words, I will show him love. I will shield and guide my heart, feelings, and emotions. If I were a woman, I wouldn’t play it safe, but play it right. I wouldn’t be seen on the streets, joints, parties and clubs with men and boyfriends, holding hands, hugging, kissing and merrying. I will be wiser, cause he may be pretentious, and shut the doors of opportunity for me. Then, leave me heart broken, and espouse another and fly away. I will make him see my worth. If I were a woman, I wouldn’t fall for men’s sweet tongues with alluring moves and words. But rather read his thoughts and look beyond the “ice creams”. I will ensure his lifelong dreams, goals, and personality are compatible with mine. Else, I get bored in the long journey of marriage.



If I were a woman, I wouldn’t allow him defile me on the morning of our love, I will ‘pretend’ a strong woman amidst his lovely and soothing advances. I will close my eyes to my feelings, my sexual feelings. Though very strong feelings, I KNOW…Knowing men love “hard” women, for real, most men do. No one want to marry a slut.



If I were a woman, fancies wouldn’t entice my soul, and fantasies will ENSLAVE MY SOUL NOT. I will know most men don’t go heartbroken, I will know all men are virgins. Until they tell you otherwise. However, I know I can’t claim otherwise.



If I were a woman, I would first gauge his love and then take a risk, once his love is substantial. I wouldn’t measure his love on material things. I wouldn’t be carry away with feeling of love. ..Knowing that the test of love is in hardships, and suffering, prove of true love. I wouldnt cause him undue pains, I will try to understand him better and prove am that angel he called me, when he tossed me. I will customize his heart, not with charms and spells, but with good behaviours punctuated with manners. I will be second to none. I wouldn’t be the first to demand sex, lest he thinks am sleeping around and mistaken a harlot. I will open my mind, and shut my emotions and desires. If I were a woman, I wouldn’t open my legs to strangers. I will heed and subscribe to divinity’s grace which antidotes evil passions …….knowing that delayed gratifications yields more profits.



If I were a woman, I wouldn’t be lousy, make my stupidity news nor publish my ignorance on facebook. I would believe in myself, I wouldn’t doubt my peculiarity nor questions my uniqueness. I wouldn’t ‘belong’, I would differ, cause am different. Alone I came, alone I shall go. Brazillian hair I wouldn’t make a necessity …….knowing that beauty and pleasure are illusions. I will size my coat and wear, believing beauty is of me not of my attires. I would live my dreams. I wouldn’t allow any man abort my dreams. Neither will I argue endlessly to show the eloquence of Socrates. I will imbibe the humility, purity and chastity of the mother of God. I will know that no man is interested in the veracity of my philosophy, as in my ability to make a house a home, an enticing and welcoming home. If I were a woman, I wouldn’t wear “boxer” a.k.a “burn short” around, lest the world mistake a prostitute. While I only follow fashion, Cause silver and gold cant purify my mutilated image.



If I were a woman, I wouldn’t wear a soldier’s look. A loosen countenance and smiling face I will enthrone, lest I scare people especially men away. ……knowing that quality smile and timed laughter seduce more than indecent dressing. I wouldn’t wear blouses, blouses that sweeps while I ramble. My attire; moderate and decent.Lest another calms my possessions, I wouldn’t allow my maids laundry my hubby’s undies. I would understand, men don’t have wombs to lose to abortion. I would guide and guard my womb, cause when lost, the salt of my womanhood is gone. Yet, though I languish in anguish, my accomplice parties around a happy man.



IF I WERE A WOMAN, I WOULD CARE FOR MY MAN, LOVE HIM, GIVE HIM A HAND IN PERPLEXITY, MAKE HIM KNOW JOY AND HAPPINESS. BE HIS LOVE AND BEST FRIEND. I WOULDN’T LISTEN TO GOSSIP. I WILL BE RATIONAL AND FORGIVING. …….BUT I’M A MAN.

WOMEN BE WISE! PLEASURE LURES! FASHION NEVER EXTINCTS!