Yes a poem about afterbirth, meant for a chuckle, and because I could write it...enjoy? |
-Afterbirth- by Keaton Foster Gross I know it This poem Afterbirth Here goes it The stuff left over Kicked out the door Washed from the floor A stain to be removed All purpose betrayed Some people eat it Sickening Oh Jesus Hippies and weirdos Dietary nut jobs Cannibals On the down low They should be Lined up and shot Well maybe not After all I’m sure to them I’m the extremist A realistic person Having a human baby In the safety of a hospital And not in a Jacuzzi tub At their Cousin Larry’s cabin In the deep woods Outside Parsippany Can I get a What about an "emergency!" 911 is of course for morons And maladjusted tree huggers I know what you’re thinking And at this critical point Throwing up in your mouth Is indeed a viable option Take a shot of jack Ole number 7 always helps Kick yourself in the ass Punch yourself in the chops Just do whatever it takes To get on through The next 36 plus lines Judge and be judged Poke and be prodded Make mountains Out of piles of shit It’s all the same 21 and a half dozen Of the other Wait, what? Afterbirth Membrane spembrane Placenta smenta All of it is blood and guts Bolts and matching nuts A vessel of human life Chemistry solely defined As an unloved waste Oh how I can relate But that is another case This poem is not about me This poem is about afterbirth Yup, you got it right This poem is about what’s left After life is created And then regurgitated Spit out from the womb Kicked to the curb Sent quickly packing In tightly sealed red bags Marked extreme biohazard Funny how life And thus its vessels Is reduced to hazardous waste To be properly dispose of Hot flames always make The bad go away Now of course Unless you are a hippie A wannabe carnivorous crackpot With an iron frying pan And a shitload Of Worcestershire sauce Then to you Bon appetite Again yuck Afterbirth There I said it And of course I just wrote it… Afterbirth Written by Keaton Foster Copyright © 2014 |