2.4 Hit Me With Your Best Shot

HIT ME WITH YOUR BEST SHOT
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Do you really want reviews?

Most people say they want brutally honest reviews. Experience indicates this simply isn’t true. What most writers want is a review that's honest with regard to their own limited perception. If you've ever gotten upset by a review and had the feeling that "they just don't get me," then you really have to re-access how you perceive honest reviews.

You do need them, however, so prepare yourself for the worst. Remember the old saying, “Be careful what you wish for, you just might get it.” Because you will eventually get a bad review. Even the most famous writers got bad reviews. The following is just a sample of a few.

"Show me one page that contains an idea." — Odessa Courier on Anna Karenina by Leo Tolstoy, 1877.

“It is no discredit to Walt Whitman that he wrote Leaves of Grass, only that he did not burn it afterwards.” — Thomas Wentworth Higginson on Leaves of Grass by Walt Whitman.

“How a human being could have attempted such a book as the present without committing suicide before he had finished a dozen chapters, is a mystery. It is a compound of vulgar depravity and unnatural horrors.” — Graham’s Lady’s Magazine on Wuthering Heights, 1848.

“The book is an emotional hodgepodge; no mood is sustained long enough to register for more than a chapter.” — Richard G. Stern on Catch 22 by Joseph Heller, 1961.

“It appears to have been written by a perverted lunatic who has made a speciality of the literature of the latrine.” — The Sporting Times on Ulysses by James Joyce, 1922.

All of these were brutally honest reviews, I don't believe the reviewers were lying about their feelings. The truth is, your writing is simply not going to appeal to everyone. Yet, even bad reviews are good for you. You just have to follow a few simple guidelines in order to handle them constructively.

  Remember that it’s nothing personal. Even those that seem like personal attacks are usually not. Its just someone who doesn’t know how to articulate their thoughts well.

  Separate the wheat from the chaff—even bad reviewers may have some gems hidden among all the rancor, and good reviewers will sometimes lead you astray accidentally. Try to sort out the best points from every review, and throw the rest away.

  Force yourself to respond to every review with a kind response. Smile and say thank you, even if it’s through gritted teeth.


Characteristics of Reviewers

There are four kinds of reader, which means there are the same four kinds of reviewers. It's important to understand them because it affects how you deal with their reviews. I've put them into graphic form to better visualize their characteristics. Just remember, the pie below is not equally divided. Some slices will be huge, while others very slim.

Those who like the way you write for the wrong reason

This includes family members and other relatives, friends, and so on. These are people who have a reason other than your writing for them to like you. Rarely will you get an honest review from them. The reason they like you is not wrong, it's just that they will probably say your writing is wonderful because they love you, or at least like you. They don't want to hurt your feelings or they have to live with you and feel it would just cause problems.

Those who like the way you write for the right reason

These are true admirers of your work. They are probably very close to you, perhaps even fellow writers. They are supporters that drive you to write more. Many are devotees who pretty much like everything you write. They "get you," but again will probably not give you much constructive criticism. They just don't think you can write a bad word. They are lovely people and great for your ego, but not very helpful to make your writing better.

Those who don’t like the way you write for the wrong reason

These include the readers with biased or prejudicial opinions. They may dislike you personally for a variety of reason including nothing you have ever done or said. They let those feelings color their opinion. This category also includes those who may be jealous of your writing success or are genre-junkies who feel the genre you write in isn’t to their liking. Why they give you reviews is sometimes a mystery. It may also be family members who are jealous of the time you spend writing.

Those who don’t like the way you write for the right reason

These are discerning readers who have some difficulty with the way you write and are able to articulate it well. This is the only group you need to worry about. Trust what they say is true and honest because they can improve your story. Unfortunately, for most writers, this category is rather slim.