Wild Life: The Man Turned Animal Vol. 4

Special Announcement: Hey everybody who is this reading this, I have some news! I just started up a blog, where I will be posting most of my new stories from now on. It's here:

http://swappingcircus.wordpress.com/

The best part about this site, is that you don't need an account, you can view everything and you can even post comments and review without registering. Also, I'm always open for story requests, so if you have a specific idea for a TF story, message me on writing.com or at the Swapping Circus!

Cat's Eye-View

Author's Note: This began from something that happened the other day. I had bought my new black cat, Ziggy, and he was pawing at my keyboard while trying to type. It gave me an idea, what if Ziggy and I swapped bodies, and he got his chance to write? In this story, my cat steals my body in order to write my upcoming Halloween story. Also, there will a follow up to this, you can bet on it!

         I was completely stuck, what was I going to write next? Halloween was quickly approaching and I had no story to write! Those four people that read my crap are going to be extremely disappointed! As I sat there sulking, my new black cat walked towards me, purring softly. Ziggy hopped on my piano stool, onto my piano and finally onto my desk. The curious feline strutted towards my keyboard, waving it's tail excitedly as it did. The approached my keyboard and began pawing at it, with it's clawless paws. The goofy feline brought a chuckle to my face, and I petted it softly on the head. I turned back to my keyboard, my mind still completely blank on what to write.

         I guess I could write something bug related, but that's just cliché! I thought of at least a dozen ideas, but none of them inspired me to write. I looked back down at my cat, who was still purring and pawing at my keyboard. "Do you need to go outside, Ziggy?" I asked, to which the cat responded by shaking it's head. I was taken aback at this, did my cat just shake his head to a question I asked? Sweet, this must be the smarted cat ever! As that cool as that was, I had to focus on the story at hand. I gave Ziggy a pet on his furry head, and went back to my writing. As my fingers rubbed against the keyboard, I found my mind still blank on what to put next. "Damn!" I exclaimed, as I angrily ruffled my hair.

         Suddenly, I heart Ziggy purring to an insane degree and once again pawing at my keyboard. "Do you want to write, boy? You don't have any fingers to do so, so just le me focus!" I exclaimed, however Ziggy continued to fiddle with my keyboard. "C'mon boy, I've got important stuff to write. We'll talk in a bit." I said as I picked up the fully-grown cat by his armpits and placed him on the ground. I went back to writing, yet I was still completely stumped. Suddenly, Ziggy hopped back onto the piano chair, and had climbed back up to my desk. He once again wandered over to my keyboard and began pawing at it again. "What is it? Do you want to write the story for me? Sorry boy, but this is something only I can do! I honestly wish I was you, a carefree cat who doesn't have writer's blocks, or have to deal with the intereference of the real world!"

         Suddenly, the cat stared at me, his piercing green eyes trapping me in a haze. My body was numb, my eyes were stiff and my mind was trained on this little black cat. I continued to stare into the mesmerizing green eyes of the feline, until I managed to blink. When I blinked, everything changed and my world was turned upside-down! The first thing I noticed was that my eyes felt strange, they were acting strange due to the light in the room. My vision wasn't perfect, but I had bigger problems to deal with at the moment. My body felt extremely hairy, and I wasn't wearing any clothes at all! My body felt strangely flexible, and I could swivel my legs into positions I didn't think was possible! When I did this, I took notice of the hair covering my body!

         It looked black, almost like... Fur! I felt like I had an appendage sticking out of my backside, I turned around only to be greeted by a tail! My nose felt tiny and petite, and I could smell new things that I never smelt before! My hearing had improved, I could hear water dripping from the tap upstairs. I had written enough stories to know what was going on! I had swapped bodies with my cat somehow, I was now trapped in his body! To confirm my assumption, my body's face came into view. It seemed gigantic, due to my much smaller stature. "You got your wish!" Exclaimed the cat, who was able to talk to me without moving his lips. I found that action to be very odd, was he psychic or something. I purred and meowed as much as I could, but no words in English would come out. "Yeah, I'm psychic." I heard him say, which caused me to look at him confused. "We have a mental link, due to the body-swap! I can read your thoughts, and you can read mine! We'll speak through our psychic connection from now on!"

         "Give me back my body!" I exclaimed through my thoughts, "Right now!" The body-stealer laughed at me, I was obviously in no state to be making demands. "Look at the pussy-cat trying to act tough! Why are you so mad, I just granted your wish!" The body-thief grabbed me by my armpits and held me in front of him. The feeling of being this high up made me nervous, my new tail fidgeting from side to side in mid-air. "What are you talking about? Wishes?" I asked, as the body thief stared into my piercing green eyes. "You see, I'm a wish-granting cat! I'm immortal and have lived for years and years! I grant the first wish a person says around me. Every time they make a wish, I gain a copy of all their memories that's implanted in my brain, making me more intelligent! When you chose me as your pet, I had no idea what to expect, until I read your stories. You write all these body-swap stories, so I assumed you make a wish correlating to swapping bodies. And would you look at that, you did not disappoint!"

         A wish granting cat? Was such a thing truly possible? "I don't care!" I exclaimed as I tried to struggle out of Ziggy's grip, "Give me my body back!" The body-thief placed me back on the ground, and petted me on the head. "Oh, I don't think so! I'll give you back your body after Halloween, after I've written a few stories on your writing.com account! For the time being, I'm James! The SegataSaturn account belongs to me for the time being!" Exclaimed Ziggy, as he placed me back on the ground. "Give me back my body!" I exclaimed, "Only I can write, you aren't qualified at all!" I exclaimed, as I began hissing at Ziggy. "Too bad!" Exclaimed Ziggy, "I've always wanted a chance to write, ever since I borrowed the knowledge of a famous writer. When he made his wish to me, he bequeathed me his knowledge of writing! Not to mention, I have all of your memories, so writing should be a synch!"

         Ziggy sat on the cushioned chair, and began clacking away on the keyboard. I leapt atop the piano chair, hopped on to the piano and strutted on four-legs to the desk. I walked over to the keyboard and began pawing at it, "Look, you're going to need me to write this! This story is a big deal, I can't let some stupid cat write all of it!" Ziggy frowned at me, and reached his hands around me. "The only stupid cat around here, is you!", He exclaimed as he grabbed by the mid-section, and effortlessly picked me up. I struggled while meowing like mad, until Ziggy brought me to the cat carrier. "Oh god, not in there!" I exclaimed, as Ziggy put me down and opened the carrier. "Get in there, I'll let you out later, when you start to behave yourself!" Ziggy exclaimed, as he began to shove my rear. I eventually gave in, and entered the carrier.

         He locked the carrier door, leaving me as a prisoner in the cage. He immediately left and went back to work on the story, as I attempted to shove the carrier door open. It wouldn't budge, no matter how hard I tried! My small and weak body just couldn't cut it! If I had claws maybe I could jimmy the lock open, but I just had Ziggy de-clawed last week. "Ziggy, give me back my body!" I exclaimed through my psychic connection, however the cat just ignored me. I laid down in the carrier and slept for a couple hours, dreaming of having my own body back. After a couple hours, Ziggy came back in and opened the gate. "Are you going to behave yourself?" Said Ziggy, speaking aloud this time.

         "Yes Zi--- I mean, master. I'll be a good cat." I stated through my psychic connection. I didn't want to mess with Ziggy again, I was going to have to deal with being a cat until November 1st. I walked up to Ziggy and began purring softly. He gave me a gentle stroke on my back, and it filled me with a great amount of joy. As I cozied up to my form body, Ronny entered the room. My cute little daschund walked up to me, and gave me a giant lick on my fur-covered face. The good thing about Ronny, was that was extremely docile. To the point where he even acts like a cat! "Now you two have fun! I have to go out on a date with Danielle!" He exclaimed, as he grabbed his wallet. "Wait, what?" I exclaimed, as Ziggy glared at me. "I mean... Go for it, master! She is your girlfriend, after all..." I couldn't believe what I said, was I actually giving into Ziggy? Then again, I had no other options open for me!

         Suddenly, I heard the doorbell ring and Ziggy immediately dashed to get it. Danielle walked out, clad in a orange blouse and blue jeans. "Hey James!" She exclaimed, while she ran up to my former body. She kissed Ziggy on the cheek, which immediately made me jealous. Ziggy grabbed the car keys, as Ronny and I lined up single file. We sat in front of the door-mat, as Ziggy was about to leave. "You two behave yourselves! I wouldn't want to put both of your in your kennels, now!" He exclaimed, as he and Danielle left. I couldn't believe it! Ziggy stole my body, my girlfriend and my story! At least I didn't have to write the Halloween story now, and I could just laze off until November 1st came along! I could tell that it was going to be a long two weeks!

Horse Whisperer

         In life there are many strange professions out there, one such profession is being a professional spiritualist. There's always a lot of people who think my abilities could be used for any old thing, other then just helping people find inner peace. Sure, there are some people who want me to use my powers to help them astral project, or find a deeper well of relaxation. However, I still get a thousand different people asking me to possess a dog or cat, so that they won't freak out when they have to get their shots. That being said, when my friend contacted me the other day to ask me if I'd be willing to possess a horse, I was all for it, due to horses being my absolute favorite animal ever.

         I pulled up at my friend's farm around 7:00 at night, I parked my Cadillac outside the barn. I wandered inside, and saw my friend Vince, feeding a carrot to a stallion. "Hey man!" He exclaimed, "Took you long enough!" He ran over to me excitedly, causing him to almost trip over a feedbag. "So why did you call me here? What's so special about possessing a horse?" I asked, to which he smirked. "Well..." He began, "I kind of want you to help me win a horseshow!" I looked at him with a frown on my face, "You want me to help you cheat at horseshow? I don't know man..." Vince smiled, "C'mon man, I' m sure you'll love it! Horses are your favorite after all!" I thought about it for a bit, even though horses were my favorite, I never possessed one before. Just never really had the time, nor any horses around to try it.

         "Maybe." I said with an unsure look on my face, "Not too sure if I want to spend all day in a horse's body." Vincent began grinning like a Cheshire cat, and walked into the corner. He took a large wad of dollar bills from the table, and brought it over to me. "I was going to hire a horse-trainer, unfortunately he was sick for a few days and couldn't make it. I spent too much time trying to hire other trainers, but no one seemed to have the same amount of experience to train any of my horses in time. If you possess my horse, and help me win, I'll give you this wad of cash! I'll also give you a little bonus, after you complete it!" He exclaimed, with a smirk on his face. "Well... Okay, just this once! So, which horse do you want me to possess?"

         He showed me to the stables, where a bunch of different horses were located. There was a black stallion, a brown Clydesdale, a donkey, and a chestnut colored horse. "You choose! I suggest not picking the donkey though, but feel free to give that one a test drive as well!" Exclaimed Vince, as he showed me to a chair. "Alright, I'll choose. I'll possess each, like trying on new pairs of shoes!" I exclaimed, as I began to relax myself. I breathed in and out, and closed my eyes. I focused deeply, feeling the silver cord connecting to my body moving slightly. The cord extends to the black stallion, as I begin channeling my essence into the equine. I felt my spiritual form begin to grow larger and larger, as I took over the horse's body. My soul entering it's body, made me feel like I entering a tornado. My soul penetrated a strange wind-like spiritual barrier, as the transformation of my spiritual form completed itself.

         I was now in the stallion's body, the world appeared black and white to me. My body felt extremely muscular, as I took a few steps on my new set of hooves, I took notice of how extremely large I was. My friend took notice of the confused horse in the corner, knowing immediately that I had overshadowed the horse. "You look good in that, Henry!" He exclaimed, "I'm jealous, you're more hung then I am!" That's when I took notice of how large my member felt, it was massive! I certainly had a large manhood resting between my legs, it was enough to make any mortal man jealous!

         "I've actually got something for ya'! I'll give it to you, after you've chosen you're horse buddy!" Exclaimed Vince, as he smirked at my borrowed form. It was a strange new experience, being a stallion with a muscular physique. However, I don't think this is the body I wanted to wear. I decided to possess the donkey next, just for shits and giggles. I felt my silver cord extend to the donkey's body, taking over the jackass' form. This form had much stubbier legs, more ragged fur, and was inferior in terms of muscles when compared to the horses. I took a few steps in the donkey's form, my new hooves digging into the mud. I let out an obnoxious braying sound, and wobble my large head around

         This body was lame, so I decided to possess the chestnut horse next. I leave the donkey's body, and extend my silver cord into the horse's body. Within an instant, I was in the horse's body and felt little to no difference from the last horse I possessed. Well, there was one big difference... As I stood there, taking in the sensations of the horse's body, I suddenly sprung a leak. Uncontrollably, I was urinating and it was lasting a fairly long time. I stood there five minutes, with no sign of the stream halting "Damn." I thought to myself, "This horse must have glandular problem..."

         There was no way I could wear this horse's form to the horseshow. Finally, I decided to enter the body of the Clydesdale. I exited the horse's body, and entered the Clydesdale's form. My soul slid into it's body, and grew in size and width. My spiritual vessel once again expanded, as I took over the horse's form. Within an instant, I was now inside the body of the stallion. For some reason, I liked this body more then the black stallion's form. It was more muscular, and had shaggy fur near each hoof. It felt more muscular, and just an overall better fit. My friend saw me curiously peering at this new form, knowing almost instantly I had taken him over.

         "Oh, do you like this form? Would you like to be this horse?" He asked, I answered by nodding my huge head. "Alright, I've got a present for you!" He walked over the table, and hid something behind his back. He walked back to my equine form and pulled out a carrot. I let out a snort and turned my back, that was just embarrassing. "C'mon, man! You gotta act like a horse, or people will get suspicious!" Exclaimed Vince, as he shoved the carrot in my face. Even though it was embarrassing, he was making a very valid point.

         I awkwardly begin chewing the carrot he's holding, my large horse teeth munch on the vegetable. Within moments, I had devoured the entire carrot. Vincent smiled at the fact I had given in and starting acted like a horse. He put his hand on my large snout, and began gently petting my puzzle. "That's a good horse, Bailey!" Exclaimed Vincent, "We'll make a killing tomorrow!" God, he just referred to me by the horse's name. As embarrassing as that was, the money I was going to get would be a tremendous amount. For the moment, I would just have to deal with the humiliation I received.

         "Alright, it's best you remain in Bailey's body for the night! I want you to get the feeling for being a horse down. I'll keep your body upstairs in a bedroom for tonight and tomorrow, because you said a few weeks ago that your body needs rest when your projecting." He stated, as he yawned and walked over to my body. He grabbed my form around the waist, and gently carried him out of the barn. As much as I loved to return to my body right now, I couldn't. I had expended to much of my astral energy, and as such was stuck in the horse's body for now.

         So, I had to do what Vince told me and stay in Bailey's body for the time being. I walked around in my walled off section of the stable, my hooves digging firmly into the mud. I took notice of the insane stench due to my equine nostrils, it smelt extremely awful to my enhanced senses. I will never get used to having four-legs, no matter how many animals I possess. It was definitely an odd feeling for me to have hooves as well, my fingers and toes being completely non-existent. I laid my large equine body down, and rested.

         Several hours later, I heard the farm-gate swing open and Vincent walked out. "Alright Bailey, let's get going and get a move on!" Vincent opened up the my stable door, and led me out into the middle of the barn. He took a brush out, and began meticulously brushing my fur. It was actually kind of fun, it was like I was being treated like a king! I could feel the brush caressing my fur, making sure it's in perfect condition for today's horseshow. Right when I was enjoying myself, Vince gave me a large smack on leathery ass, making me flinch and run forward a bit. I turned to him and let out a big snort.

         "Don't worry, you'll start enjoying it! Horses get smacked on the ass all the time, they enjoy it!" He shouted, while giving me another big smack on the behind. I had a feeling my behind was going to be sore at end of the day. After I had been groomed, I was fitted with horseshoes. Having these little metal aberrations bound to my hooves, made feel like I was a slave being bound by shackles. In the body I was currently in, I am considered a slave of the farm. After all, I am just my owner's horse. Wait, did I really just think that? My thoughts were beginning to join with the thought processes of Bailey. To the point where the two of us began thinking as one, something that was very bizarre to me.

         I was accessing all of Bailey's memories, on top of my own. Vincent gave me another smack on my rear, and I immediately bolted out of the farmhouse. Vincent led me over to a steel carrier attached to his truck and told me to enter. Since I didn't want to get smacked again, I did as I was told. I climbed into the steel carrier, my horseshoes clacking against the metal of the carrier. As soon as I had entered, Vincent closed the steel door behind me. I anxiously whipped my hairy black tail back and forth, waiting for Vincent to start up his truck. After a few minutes, Vincent started up the vehicle and drove off. I whinnied excitedly as the vehicle drove onwards, excited by the prospect of meeting other horses. It seems like Bailey was exerting more control over this form, however I had to maintain as much spiritual control as possible.

         If I let Bailey's personality spill out, I'd be pushed out of his body and back to my own. If what Vincent had said is true, then Bailey hasn't been fully trained. It could prove disastrous to lose control in this situation, even for a moment! After a while, we arrived at the gates of the outside arena. Numerous horse-owners and trainers had gathered, with their stallions and mares in tow. I was unloaded from the carrier, and I was greeted by another smack on the behind from Vincent. Strangely enough, I was beginning to enjoy it. All this ass smacking is probably causing me to develop a fetish, something I couldn't use right now. I followed Vincent as he led me to the front gates. Another stallion was crossing my path, and shoved into me accidentally. I let out a hefty snort, as the stallion backed off and slowly trotted away.

         "This is a fine specimen of a horse, good sir!" A strange man said, as he caressed my mane with his hand. "Is he for sale?" My friend laughed at the notion, "Sir, this fine stallion here is going to help me win this competition!" Exclaimed Vincent, "He's my ace in the hole and I wouldn't sell him for anything!" Vincent laughed at the man, and motioned for me to follow him as he walked away. I looked and saw the man frowning at us. With my larger ears I could hear him whisper, "Once that dull stallion of yours loses, I'll take him from you and turn him into glue!" I began to grow fearful, it wasn't for myself however. As soon as the show was done, I'd snap right back into my body, as if nothing had happened. However, if he stole Bailey and had him killed, I'd be extremely depressed. My mind and soul had bonded with the horse, to the point where I could feel his pain and anguish.

         At this point, Bailey was as much a part of me, as I was a part of him. I followed Vince into the dark hallways of the horseshow, following behind him ever so closely. We reached the main stable part of the building, where I could see into the outdoors center of the arena. There were numerous hurdles set up, and numerous wreathes of flowers. It was highly decorated, painted fully white and was expertly furnished. In the middle was a man, sitting atop a noble white steed. The white stallion trotted across the tarmac gently, while the man was handed a microphone by a nearby person. "Well, I see we've got a lot of good healthy stallions and mares today! Boy, do I feel jealous to be them! Those guys get fed and watered for free, and they never worry about anything!" Stated the man, to which the audience joined him in laughter.

         That statement was wrong, at least when applied to me. What happened next was that I was fitted with a bride and tackle. The saddle was fitted around my muscular physique, complete with spurs and a leather headpiece that was fitted around my equine head. After I had been fitted, I was mounted by Vince. He shot me a smile as he looked down upon me, and gave me a pat on the head. At that moment, numerous horses being ridden by their owners made their way to the middle. I awkwardly shuffled to the middle, not used to be fitted with this gear and having someone riding me. Vince gave me a smack on the rear with a horse-whip, and I quickly shuffled towards the other horses.

         I began to gain Bailey's complete knowledge of how to act and behave like a horse, on top of how to properly move in this new body. Bailey was helping me out, with his equine instincts and my human knowledge, there was no way we could lose! As we entered the middle, the strange man from before was there waiting. "I wish you and your horse to victory. However, if that stallion was yours loses, I suggest putting him down." Stated the man, as he smirked. "What kind of monster are you, that you'd ask me to sell my horse if I lost?" Asked Vincent, who locked eyes with the insulting individual. "I'm William Baxton the 3rd, I'm no monster! I've one this horseshow for the past ten years. I'll tell you what though, if you lose... I'll definitely play the part of the monster."

         It was obvious to me what William was planning to do to Bailey, and what he was planning to do with Vincent. I've seen his type before, rich and arrogant men get away with everything. The man wore a white suit, and had a long black moustache. He wore a white top hat, and to match he had a white stallion with a blonde mane. This man truly looked like he owned the world, and if we lost he'd put us in our place. With all that arrogance Vincent was showing earlier, this kind of power-hungry rich guy would jump at putting us in the ground. If we lost, he'd kill us just to make an example. Even if we won, we'd still be damned. That monster would be jealous of our victory, and surely end us

         A trumpet sounded the beginning of the contest, to which the horses lined up in order. The breeds of the horses were judged, along with their pedigree and behavior. I was placed on a pedestal, and judged next to the other horses. The judges liked what they saw, when they got a glimpse of how well-bred and well-trained I was. I was shoe-in to take this section of the contest, as most of the horses seemed to be oddly jittery and erratic. It was if something was wrong with them, something that seemed strangely suspicious. As I had rested in the stalls, I noticed two workers talking. "The horses have been acting very strange today. They always seem to get like this on the day of the big show." Said the younger worker. "It's always been like this, for the last ten years. It must be the sun, still it's weird how only a couple of horses manage to keep their composure."

         Wait... Ten years? Wasn't William the winner for the last ten years? It had to be a coincidence and yet... If William was rich, he could've hired people to spike the feeding supplies of every horse in the arena. I had to stay away from food all day, if I wanted to make sure William lost. As the day dragged on, I turned down any kind of food Vincent offered me. I had to literally jump hurdles as well, using Bailey's knowledge to my advantage. Finally, it came down to the award ceremony. Even though I gave every challenge my best, I had a feeling William would win. It was at that point I'd jump out of the horse, in order to call Vince on my cell and warn him. However, I was surprised when the announcer said that I... Won first place? I was so surprised, that I awkwardly stood still for at least three minutes.

         During that time, William threw a huge tantrum. He threw his hat to the ground in complete rage, and walked up to Vincent, before I had time to ascend to the 1st place pedestal. "Now, boy..." Began the angry rich man, "I'd like to buy that nice horse of yours." Stated the Texan. "I told you, he's not for sale. Especially now that he won the contest." William frowned, "Either give me that horse, or there'll be hell to pay. I own this place, boy and I intend to keep it that way. I've been having some... Financial problems as of late, and these contest happen to be a large source of income for me. So, give me that horse and I won't end your life." Even though William was whispering this threat, I heard all of it. My body moved on it's own, being controlled by Bailey.

         Bailey bashed right into the Texan, causing a bag to fall out of his pocket. "What's this?" Said the announcer as he picked up the bag, "This is a special kind of herb, it makes horse's react strangely when mixed with their feed... Don't tell me! For the last ten years, you've been... Cheating!" The Texan looked around shiftily, "Yeah, that's right! I cheated! None of you posers deserved to win this contest, my family has had pure-bred wining horses for years! This contest would've been my 11th place trophy! I would've gotten away with it too, if it wasn't for that meddling horse!" Exclaimed the rich man, as he was taken away by police officers. After the strangeness of today, I decided to return to my body. I concentrated, and undid the connection of my silver cord to the horse's form.

         Within an instant, I was back in my own body and proud to be back to normal. I heard my cellphone ring, it was obviously Vincent. "You know what..." I said to myself, "I'll call him back later." I took some time to my own, and looked out at the farm. A couple days ago, this farm was just a dusty and smelly old piece of land. Looking at it now, it felt like... Home. Maybe, Bailey had imprinted his memories onto me. In a way, I hope some of my knowledge imprinted onto him, maybe making him as smart as I am. I doubted it, but the world of spiritualism is vast and odd. I felt like I had a made big accomplishment, not only have I saved my life, I won the contest and got that monster of a Texan arrested! Now, if only I could get rid of this nagging desire for oats...

Mr. Fluff E. Bear

Author's Note: I felt like doing this on a whim, this actually used to be a video series on youtube. It basically involved a guy in a bear suit just goofing off, what I always found awesome about it was the video where he rode his motorcycle, while wearing a fursuit. Sadly, he removed his videos and I can't find 'em anymore. So, since my 1 year writing.com anniversary is coming up, I thought I'd do a sorta remake of the first video in story form, just for laughs. I hope you guys enjoy!

         It was another lazy Thursday night, I had just fallen asleep in bed after watching old cartoons. All I could think about was the absolute boredom of reality. Whenever things were interesting or fun, I'd always lose interest after an hour or two. As I drifted off to sleep, I wished to myself for something to spice my life up. Something that could bring me eternal enjoyment and never get dull, that's something I could seriously use! As I drifted off, I thought of an old cartoon show I watched. It was about a giant plush teddy bear, who would always goof off and fall down. He was a sentient teddy bear, who would never take anything seriously. In my eyes, that bear was lucky, as he never got bored! That bear was called Reggie The Fun Bear, a fictional character who never got stale. He honestly defined my child hood, and he always brightened up my day whenever I felt bad!

         I envied that bear, being free and able to just be himself. Being a giant teddy bear could probably be a very fun experience, like wandering around in a mascot costume. As I laid there in bed sleeping, I was immediately awoken by a lightning strike outside. My body felt strangely larger and I felt insanely warm, however I chalked it up to being half awake and I went back to sleeping. My dreams were strange, as if I had eaten a thousand pounds of candy before I went to bed. In the dream, I was a goofy giant teddy bear and I had to deal with being a children's entertainer. I was a live-action styled mascot character, similar to Dudley The Dragon.

         It was an enjoyable experience, yet it wasn't as fulfilling as I thought it was going to be. I was just an entertainer, I was the butt of everyone's joke and I was already missing being a human. Luckily for me, it was all just a really dumb dream. Or at least I thought it was, until I woke up and found my body strangely chubby. I had no idea why I was suddenly so tubby, my head seemed massive and I felt like I was wearing a strange fur coat over my entire body. I was going to clear my throat, until I realized I couldn't feel my throat at all! Hell, I couldn't even move my mouth or eyes! What had happened to my while I was sleeping? I hopped out of bed, and heard a strange audible "Boing!" sound as I bounded from my sleeping quarters. My feet hit the ground, and I immediately trip and fall for no discernible reason.

         I got a good look at my body, and I was in complete shock! My body was covered in a strange brown fur coat, and my insides felt strangely warm. I looked at my hands, which looked strangely like the mitten hands of teddy bear. Wait... A teddy bear? That couldn't be, I'm a human! I needed to run over to the mirror to confirm this, maybe I was just seeing things! I ran over to the mirror, and to my shock I saw staring back at me... A goofy looking giant teddy bear! I had a comically large plastic nose, a fake plastic grin and black little beady eyes. The fake-fur on my stomach was light brown color, while the rest of my body was covered in brown fur. My whole body felt oddly soft, almost like hugging up against a normal teddy bear. The feeling was almost... Nostalgic. Being a teddy bear was definitely going in my journal, if I ever find a way to return to normal. I wasn't even too sure how this happened, aside from the half-awake wish I made last night.

         I couldn't feel my insides at all, but how was able to live without organs? Maybe I was stuffed with fluff, and that fluff now constituted my insides. I was just guessing at this point, so I decided to calm myself down a bit. I looked down at my surprisingly pudgy body, and decided to run some tests. I took a couple steps with my legs, and fell down for no apparent reason. It was probably due to having shorter legs, something that took a bit of getting used to. As I hit the ground, I heard another strange cartoony sound effect. What was with this comically strange body? I had wanted something like this earlier, but I was just kidding around! I landed straight on my rear, and I could feel something there as I did. "Oh god!" I thought to myself, "Please don't be a tail! Please oh please, don't let that be a tail!"

         I reached my mitten-hand around to my backside and felt around. To my shock and horror, I felt a small fluffy ball-shaped tail. I couldn't believe that I was a living teddy-bear, this was all to surreal! I stood up, and took notice of a cut on my fluffy arm. I found that I was bleeding something that wasn't blood, it was stuffing! I was filled with nothing but stuffing, how could I even be considered alive? I guess magical giant living teddy-bears was a thing now! As I looked at the tiny cut, I noticed out of the corner of my plastic eyes, two tiny sewing needles flying towards me. These magical needles floated towards my cut arm, and immediately stitched it back up. The needles joking poked me on my little plastic nose, before gently floating away.

         The needles were amazing, the sewing job they did was seamless! For now though, I had to focus on returning to normal. I figured it was a synch, I'll just write my name down on paper and get some proof! Wait a minute... What was my name again? I struggled in vain, searching my memories for any semblance of what my actual name was. The only name that seemed to belong to me that I could think of was Fluff E. Bear. I was going to have to deal with this stupid name for the moment, until I could figure out what was going on.

         Suddenly, I heard the phone ringing and I bolted over to my house phone. As soon as I got over to the phone, I comically toppled over with the phone landing in my lap. I picked up the phone with my mitten hands, and unsurprisingly I couldn't dial worth crap. My fingers were non-existent, so how was I supposed to answer it? The call eventually was taken to my answering machine, and I could hear a rather kind sounding voice talking to me: "Mr. Fluff E. Bear, good day to you! I really liked your credentials, entertaining at birthdays and being a mascot for a football team is perfect for what we're going for! We'd like to interview for your application to our toy story, "Toys & Magic"! I'm free for 9 am tomorrow, I'll see you then!"

         Wait a minute, what the hell was he talking about? I looked at my bedroom clock, and was completely taken aback at the time. It was 11:59, which meant tomorrow was when my interview was! What kind of employer calls an interviewee this late at night, and how did I sign up for a job when I just turned into a bear today? Today was making no sense to me at all, so I decided to roll with it for the time being. Suddenly, I feel something sharp poke into my backside, as I leap forward in pain. As I turned around, I found that those creepy flying needles from earlier were floating right in front of my face.

         I didn't really want to mess with these needles, and get my stuffing torn out. I decided to let the needles do their thing, so I opened my arms up wide and stood still. The needles took out a box of teddy bear accessories, readying me for my job interview tomorrow. They stitched three buttons onto my chest, neatly show the circular black pieces of plastic on my felt-like fur. Next, they moved towards my flank and began stitching an embroidered patch onto it. The patch said "Hugs and Kisses!" in big pink letters, something I found absolutely stupid. The patch slightly ached it, when it was quickly stitched on to my hip. I rubbed at the slightly painful area, as the needles went to work on the final part of my look. They flew towards my neck, with a floating bowtie following them. They stitched the little blue bowtie to my neck, right below my heck. After the needles had finished, they pointed to something sticking out of my back.

         I hadn't even noticed it before, it was some kind of strange ripcord! I pulled on the ripcord and I felt a sound box from within me say in a rather goofy voice, "I'm Mr. Fluff E. Bear, sir! Pleased to make your acquaintance!" I tested the ripcord a few times, but all I got were goofy generalized phrases about wanting to have fun and make lots of friends. I had no choice at this point, I was going to have to deal with this new body and new life. I looked over the clock and was surprised to see it was already 8:15! It felt like we had only been at this for no longer then thirty minutes! Suddenly, I heard a honking from outside. I looked outside to see a truck that looks like it was meant for delivering toys. It had a red and blue design, and seemed to have a lot of toys and board games in the back.

         I wandered over to the door, and tried my best to fiddle the door open with my weird hands. After a while I managed to get it open, only to be greeted by the strangest site yet. The grass was a strange blue color, the sky seemed like a painted mural and all the trees looked like they were made out of Legos! I looked at the supper "Taxi Driver" and saw that he was a weird two-legged horse in a suit. He wore no pants, and stood on his hind hooves defying all forms of logic. At the end of each of arms was a regular hoof, which confused me as to why he'd be a taxi driver. I stood there in shock and awe for a while, until I felt the two needles poke me in the butt again, causing me to leap forward slightly. "I'd do what they say, if I were you!" Exclaimed the horse, "You don't want them to stitch a "Kick Me!" sign to your fanny!"

         I nodded nervously, and the horse motioned for me to follow him. I followed the horse to the back, where he immediately threw open the door to the backseat. I was surprised that the horse was able to manipulate the door so easily, despite the lack of fingers. In the middle-row there were no seats, but a large "Fluff E. Bear" box, which I assumed belonged to me. For some reason, I had memories of being bought while inside that box. I was purchased, but who was the one that bought me? My memories failed me in that department, but I assumed I was getting the job to pay for things for that person. After all, what would a teddy bear need with money? It's not like I have any basic needs or wants, I was a living inanimate object after all. I climbed into the van, and walked over to the big box. I nervously stepped inside, and swiveled my bear body around, so that I was facing forward. Immediately after doing this, the top part of the box fell down trapping me inside.

         My body went limp and I became a motionless toy, I felt extremely panicked by this. "Don't worry Mr. Bear!" Exclaimed the horse, "Happens to every toy on his first ride!" As we cruised down the highway, I took notice of all the weirdness going on. Dogs were walking people, chickens were purchasing meat, monkeys were police-officer and helicopters could land in crowded cityscapes. It was all to weird for me to take in, I was completely confused by this whole debacle! I was convinced that I had either stumbled across an alternate universe, or unintentionally created one! The car continued along the highway, until it stopped at the toy store. The horse went back to the middle row, and opened my box. I crawled out, feeling extremely appreciative that I was once again animate!

         I stood on a strange parking lot, made out of gummy bears. It was like a street right out of some sugary kid's show, it was insanely bizarre! I turned to see the horse about to leave, he was happily waving his hairy tail as he left. "Pleasure helping you, Mr. Fluff E. Bear! You truly are a unique toy!" Exclaimed the horse, as he climbed back into his car and turned on the ignition. I stood and watched the horse drive away, wondering what he meant about me being "Unique". How was I so unique and different, when compared to a talking taxi horse? I shuffled over the building, and saw numerous children walking out from the building. The weird thing about it was, that the children were the only thing normal about this weird world. Maybe they are responsible for it's construction in some way, or maybe it was built for them in the first place. Whatever the case was, I journeyed forward up the steps of the building.

         I went up to the front door of the building, and saw the sign in big red letters. It spelt out "Toys & Magic: The new home of Fluff E. Bear!" My new home? I hadn't even been interviewed yet, and they already wanted to give me a position? Truly, this was a topsy-turvy toy world, it was like my old toy box brought to life! I wandered into the front of the store, where I was greeted by a sales associate. "Hello!" Said a strange living Barbie doll, "My name is Mina! Welcome to Toys & Magic, you're new home!" The doll laughed, as she took notice of my embroidered patch. I nervously covered the patch, blocking it from the doll's view. "Don't be nervous, I think it's a cute patch!" I followed the doll to the back, where I was greeted by the manager. The manager was a kangaroo, who had strange toy-like legs. They looked like they were made out of old robot toys from the 50s. He clutched in his hand an action figure of "Sir Henry Iron-Fist", an old toy from 80s. That toy had been discontinued long ago, though was far from being some rare thought-after hard to find sought after toy.

         "Ah, so this is Fluff E. Bear! Welcome to your new home, fuzzy butt!" Exclaimed the manager, who waved around his large tail as he spoke. His massive tail swung so openly, that he knocked some toys off the shelf in his excitement. "Sorry 'bout that! The misses says I need to have it shortened! Now, I'll leave you alone in the toy section for a while! All you have to do is goof around and the kids'll love it! It's an undeniable sugar job!" Exclaimed the kangaroo, as he began to hop away. Before I left he turned back and said, "Oh, by the way... When I said this you're new home, I meant to say you're home away from home! Feel free to stay here, whenever you get bored of that drab and normal looking apartment!" The kangaroo turned his back to me, and immediately hopped out of his sight. I stood there in complete awe of this insane world, wondering what to do next. I decided to pull on my ripcord for some tips, "It's like I always say, just go with the flow!" I listened to the voice box, and decided to do what it suggested. I would deal with how to return to normal later, for now I was forced to play the part of a big goofy teddy bear!