May's Horse

May’s horse



“You inherited what?” June asked, looking at me blankly.

“Her horse…” I replied. I had repeated this sentence at least six times, thrice to my parents and thrice to my grandmother, but that repetition didn't really count because she was slightly deaf. Now, I was saying it to my other sister, June. May’s husband, Jack, was glad to pass him on to me; it reminded him too much of her. I was more shocked than anyone, because I had no clue about the horse. I had been away for a couple of years and apparently, May had bought the horse to spend some ‘wild time’. 

Jack came in, interrupting my thoughts. He handed me a folded note.

“May was very emotional towards... the end...” he explained. He gulped before continuing. “She saw some movie and decided to leave us letters…”



Mine was long. She wanted me to know that she loved me and had missed me a lot. I was the youngest sister, she said, but I had to be the family glue now, especially with June living in another continent.

I came to the Moonlight part.



“…I am also leaving another responsibility with you April. I have a horse, Moonlight. He has a brown chestnut color and is very friendly. I’m sure he’ll be a joy to you just as he has been to me. I know you’re going to be horrified of being in charge of a big four-hoofed animal. Well, you might just love it, coz I did! He is currently in charge of a vet you know very well. Yes, April, I think it’s time you allow that gate to open…”

I stiffened at that sentence. I knew who she was referring to. I was angry. She knew I wouldn't refuse her last wishes.



***

I stood in front of the horse. It was a strong healthy creature. I had no idea how to handle it. I had no inclination of getting on and decided to chat with Moonlight. I patted his wet nose and looking into his eyes I explained to him that he was now under my care and I had no idea how and what to do with him. As I patted his mane, I heard the rustle of hay behind me. I had known he would come, but I still didn't want him to. I turned, my eyes stony.

“Hey!” he said cautiously.

I nodded stiffly. I wasn't going to talk at all if I could help it. Maybe I could just pretend I lost my voice. Then I remembered he was a vet, he could probably figure out I hadn't.

He paused for a second and then got down to the point. “Moonlight is a very sturdy horse. He won’t buck and heave even if you sit wrong. May was scared of even approaching him at first. You’re in a much better position I see, so you’ll just need me to show you how to handle a horse without the first step of getting over the fear. ”

“No one else around to teach me?” I asked.

He looked down, hesitating. Then he drew a note from his pocket. My heart sank. May again!

Mike and I had been going out for many years and he had proposed. But I had ended the relation when I caught him with my best friend Elsa. May and Mike had tried to convince me otherwise but my eyes couldn't lie. I had left to study abroad.

“May told you to do it yourself and you’re respecting her last wishes. Fine” I snapped at him. He nodded and smiled slightly before bringing out another horse from the neighboring stall. We spent some time in the stall, he showing me some complex things about a horse, like what a stirrup and saddle were. I really had no idea about the horses. Moonlight stood patiently and I found myself imagining how May would look riding him and I snorted. She must have looked silly.



***

The evening breeze played with my hair strands and we were trotting Moonlight and Saturn along the woody path. It had been a month. Mike had kept our conversation on horse stuff. I was able to ride well now and he had taken me out into the nearby woods for my first jump. The soaring feeling of jumping was thrilling and Mike informed me softly that May had enjoyed the same thing too. Mike observed me as I looked into the distance, thinking of May.

“April…” he said. I knew he was going to talk about Elsa.

“Mike, it’s in the past. I forgive you, just forget it.”I said, sighing. He ignored me and went on.

“Elsa gave this horse to May.” He said quietly.

I started. “What?” I asked him incredulously.

“She was obsessed with me and… staged all that drama. But when you left, she was very remorseful. When she found out about May’s cancer, she gave Moonlight to her, saying that you would have found a way to cheer May up and since it was her fault you weren't home…” he trailed off, also looking at the trees. I was zapped. I didn't know what to say. I got off Moonlight and patted him. “Elsa tried to get in touch with you when she heard you didn't hear any of us out…” he said, getting off Saturn too.

“I didn't read the letters.”

We looked at each other in silence. I felt all my anger and hurt melt away. Finally, I smiled at him and he smiled back, his eyes reflecting all the love he still felt for me. My old feelings came rushing back too, mixed with grief about May. I hadn't felt any emotion properly for a long time. I collapsed on the muddy path, tears pouring out all the pent up emotions. Mike held me close.



Finally, I looked up at the now starry skies. “Thanks for the horse, May…” I smiled through my tears.