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Rated: 13+ · Short Story · Comedy · #1877162
A born again assassin


        "Liar! You know you've conspired with Satan!
        Tell me where that Devil is and I might let you keep
        your fingers." Sarah shouted, holding her Luger
        on the would be assassin.

        The assassin bit on a poison hidden in his
        mouth and died instantly.
        "God damn you! I will not rest until I find your
        leader. I will destroy your evil government and
        slaughter anyone, who gets in my way!
        Your people will be in chains!
        And there leaders hanged until their rotting bodies
        drop off the gallows!
        The world will burn! Until I have justice!" Sarah cursed.

        "Ehm? Excuse me." a small Feiry appeared before Sarah.
        "What the Hell are you?!" Sarah leapt back, pointing her Luger
        at the Feiry that was no bigger than her thumb.
        "Blinkin. I'm a Feiry. I was drinking some honey rum
        and I heard you cursing. You really shouldn't slaughter people.
        That's not justice." the Feiry sipped out of a small butter cup.

        "I've lost my mind.. . I am Sarah!
        I am the hand of God! I seek out evil doers and burn their cities
        and then .. rebuild them.
        God damn thee! Get thee behind me Satan!" Sarah was clearly
        upset and took a drag on her rolled marijuana.
        Blinkin didn't budge.
        "Ehm. I guess I didn't make myself clear.
        If you burn the world, then everything dies.
        And no one is happy, because they're all dead.
        It's about a balance..." Blinkin was interrupted by Sarah's
        Luger shot at the tiny Feiry.

        "Okay. I'm immortal." the Feiry continued unharmed.
        Blinkin waved her hands high and Jesus popped out of thin air
        on a radiant mushroom cloud.
        Sarah looked with glassy eyes at her Savior.
        "Sarah. You must forgive those who trespass against you."
        Jesus spoke in a deep voice.
        Sarah shot Jesus between his eyes.
        Jesus exploded in a fiery nuclear blast.

        "I see I've misjudged you." Blinkin said .. . .
      And Sarah was instantly transformed into a beautiful faun.
      The young deer leapt off into the green woods
      where there were signs posted for hunting season.
      "These humans are tough nut to crack." Blinkin remarked
      and fluttered her six wings off into the forest to watch over
      Sarah.


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