Scaling Back the Crazy

In Victorian times, good manners and ettiquite were comman place among all. In modern times, at least in my limited Earthly experience, it seems like there is no common ettiquette practices. Everyday it seems that we are all embroiled in a cespool of individuals who have not concept of what is going on in anyone elses life. Good Manners and good taste aren't lost forever. I believe that if everyone had a guidebook to expected decorum, we would all not be experincing the anxiety of what is expected of us. Some will not wake from the slumber of their own life and realize that they are a part of an interdepdent world and should always act as such. Even these uncivilized folk deserve to be treated with dignity respect and empathy, thereby scaling back the craziness of this overcrowded magical world that we call Home.
There are many areas to be discussed that I feel my years as an industrious public servant have provided me ample qualifications to discuss. Although I have much life experience I do not pretend to know it all and realize that in different cultures different customs exist. I find my rules for modern ettiqute are only applicable in industrialized places. I find that nomadic cultures have a pretty clear understanding is what is expected of them to be a productive member of society. And as a twenty-something from Western New York, I have very little understanding of life in other regions. Although from some of what I have seen and read in books they must be doing something right as they have relatively low crime rates and seem to have avaliable resources.
What I just did was using my system for "acting right." I find words like "decorum" and "ettiquette" difficult to explain and intimidating. "Acting Right" gets my point across in a non-threatening manner, or it is my intended purpose for it to do such. The first step in my system is to "Identiify and Anticipate" this step involves you knowing what you wish to accomplish by your actions or words and anticipating any negative reactions to either and acting right accordingly. In the aforementioned paragraph I wanted to clarify what my experience in the world was and was not. However, I anticipated that other socities existed where my views may not be applicable or proper, so to act right and not cause offense, I accounted for that. The main purpose for "acting right" is to get your ideas across in a quick and concise manner without causing offense to others and engaging their system in yours for however short your interaction may be. We are all connected to someone or something else, even the hermit that lives in the forest has a relationship with the world and home. There are rules and expectations in every situation and if there is not I am going to make them up. The great thing about rules and mores is that they can be altered and changed to reflect better ideas that may come up. And if you are blessed to be writing a book, this will provide you with a mini-series.

Chapter 1
"Times when you should shut up."
Everyone wants to be heard and understand. However, you have more ears than you do mouth so you should do twice as much listening as you do talking. How many times do you smile and nod just to get through a conversation and ten minutes later have no recollection about what you have just heard? For shame, I too have been guilty of this faux paux.
How does one avoid this? Change your focus! Instead of focusing on what you want to say, focus on what the other participant in the conversation is saying. If you are face to face does the other person appear uncomfortable? Are they engaged in the conversation or do they appear in a hurry? Is there a better time to impart the information to the individual than this current moment? Probably the biggest problem in the whole world is that we are not omnipotent. We cannot possibly know at all times what specifically is going on with every aspect or person in our environment. So it is kind to be sensitive to the fact that we are not usually the most important person at each moment to the other person. I know that some people will scoff at that concept but I assure you that it is true.
One of the most obvious times when you should shut up is when someone is gossiping "with" you. Gossip is just ridiculous. What is going on within others lives should be of no consequence to you unless the person who is actually experincing the maladies imparts it upon you. Let the daft fool who obviously has nothing better to do with their time have their 3 seconds of relevance, Say "Oh," and either change the subject or depart. This way if it should come back to you, you can very simply say that yes you were ear-raped in hearing the information but you offered no opinion nor did you repeat it any further. Because at the end of the day, if you are known as a gossip as in days of old you will be a piriha. No one will ever tell you anything. If you sit back quietly and don't repeat things people will tell you more information than you will ever care to know. Trust me, I could write a whole different series base on useless information that people impart on me because they know I am a safe place. I may have to do that one day just to shut the voices in my head up.
If you happen to see me on the street talking to myself, feel free to take that oppurtunity to shut up too. More generally speaking, if you are going to say nothing except passing judgement on some person, do us all a favor and keep it to yourself. There are enough social messages telling all of us everyday how much we suck and how we don't measure up to some ideal that some moron made up and everyone follows just because we have all given up the ability to think and reason within and amongst ourselves, that we don't really need to know your opinion as well.
People should always without a doubt, shut up when one person is in front of others talking. Anyone who has taken one public speaking knows how hard it is to be in front of a room full of people trying not to piss yourself while trying to speak on a topic that you didn't know so much about in the first place. On an episode of "Judging Amy" the character said it best, "I'm ruling and you are shutting up." People have completely lost respect for the art of listening. Everyone is so distracted by technology, cell phones, Ipads, pocket radios, Ipods, that it is no wonder our culture is a bunch of soul-dead robots. R2D2 has more emotion and soul than most of the people I encounter everyday. It is easy to figure out who "has the floor" so to speak. As a hint if the person is trying to give you information that you need, they get the floor. Right now as you are reading this book which is truly a labor of love on my behalf, if you are twittering or texting you are not giving me your full attention and I would rather you just put the book down and get hit by a bus than read another word because you will never understand what I am trying to say!