Boyfriends

You remember way back before Justin Timberlake bought his share of MySpace?

That's when I met my first boyfriend, if you can even call him that.

Let's start from the very beginning.

Back when I was in seventh grade, social networks were all the rage. I remember I had a Friendster account, a Hipster account, a Hi5 account and an account in EveryonesConnected.Com. Needless to say, I also had a MySpace account. That's when I met the guy we will refer to as Piero.

PIERO

I don't remember where he's from, I don't remember what he's like, all I remembered about him was that, in his profile picture, he was wearing a red baseball cap. I was in seventh grade then which meant that I was 13 years old. Guess how old Piero was?

10 years old.

I was a cougar even before it was cool to be one. I can't really remember how we entered into this really weird relationship. All I can recall is that we sent messages back and forth and in one message, he just told me he loved me. At that time, all I could think about was when my parents told me they loved me, I had to say that I loved them right back.

So, that's what I did.

I also vaguely remember posting "I love you" comments on his MySpace page and he would do the same to mine. I felt really cool because I had a boyfriend but I couldn't really tell anybody. I remember walking into the classroom at school with that giddy feeling that comes with a budding relationship.

I knew I had to keep this a secret but one particular day, I decide to test the waters while talking to my seatmate.

"You know what, I know this relationship wherein one of them is in the seventh grade and the other is in the third grade." I said.

"Ewwww." Friend #1 said.

"Which one's which?" Friend #2 said.

"Obviously the older one's the guy!" Friend #1 said.

Afterwards, they moved on to a healthy discussion of who their favorite 'N Sync members are. At this very moment, I learned to keep my mouth shut.

When I got home after school one day, I headed straight to our computer and logged in on MySpace. I checked Piero's page and I saw an "I love you" comment that wasn't mine. It was from another girl.

Here ends my relationship with Piero.

Unsurprisingly, it did not sting at all. It all ended with an apathetic "Oh well."

Then came high school. I finally started meeting guys that live in the same zip code as me.

Somehow, I got a hold of a random guy's number so, I decide to text message him.

Let's call him Andre.

ANDRE

I live in a very small town where everyone knows everyone else. One day, his sisters and cousins came up to me in school and  gave me unsolicited facts about Andre.

They told me when his birthday was, what he likes, what he doesn't like, in short, they told me things that I couldn't care less about.

In my head, when I sent that very first text message to Andre, I just wanted the bragging rights that came with having a guy friend. Coming from an all-girl's private high school, guy friends are like currency, the more you have, the higher you get in the social hierarchy.

But apparently, in Andre's head, I was going to be his first girlfriend.

So, one day, it came. The "I love you" text message. Actually, he said:

"Is it okay if I told you I love you?"

Honestly, who says that?

Anyways, I was wiser this time around. I coolly told him...

"Only if it's okay if I don't say it back."

So, that's how our text messages went. He would profess his love for me and I would ignore him.

After a few months of unrequited love, he gave up.

Here ends my relationship with Andre. All I remembered feeling was relief.

Then came sophomore year of high school. This is when I met a guy we will call Lance.

LANCE

As I have told you, we live in a small town. Lance was a friend of my older sister and my younger brother. One day though, he started talking to me.

I was flattered with the attention and I led him on.

I was never one to say no so, after a few months of knowing him, I agreed when he asked me to go to his house. I remember walking through the gates of his house and seeing their beautiful garden. He lived in a two storey house and his room was on the first floor.

When we got inside, no one was home.

He took me into his room and once the door was closed, we started making out. He took me to the bed and we kissed more while on there. I felt his hands making their way under my skirt and up my thigh but all I could think about was "Am I kissing right?" I felt his tongue in my mouth and I remember that it felt unusual and alien.

He pulled my underwear down and touched me in a spot that I didn't know could feel that good. We stopped kissing enough for him to take my skirt off and unbutton my top. He took off his clothes and got something from his night stand.

That was the first time I saw a condom.

I watched as he disappeared in me. I relaxed myself as the initial pain turned into pleasure. I remember urging him to go faster and harder.

He came.

I didn't.

He cleaned himself up and I looked down. I had kept my bra on.

That was pretty much how things went. Sex was the main ingredient in my relationship with Lance.

This particular relationship lasted longer than all my other ones. I gave three years of my life to him. But a wise person once told me that a relationship based solely on sex will have no chance.

He was right.

I really didn't have anything in common with him. We fought a lot and I wanted out so, I ended it.

Plus, the sex wasn't all that good anyway.

Here ends my relationship with Lance. When he was gone, I was extremely aware that I was alone.

On boring day during the summer before college, I was online chatting with random people. At this point, FaceBook was all the rage but I decided to revisit my MySpace page.

That's when I met a guy we will call Em.

EM

Em was from Australia. Due to the time difference, I only talked to him late at night. We talked through Yahoo! Messenger and we would look at each other's faces on the webcam.

Honestly, I do not remember much about him.

What I do remember was one night, he got me to take my shirt off. I did but I made sure that the camera only saw my face. He told me that I should touch myself and I did. He told me he wanted to see what I was doing so, I showed him. I took my panties off and fingered myself.

I told him I wanted to see what he was doing and I saw his webcam slowly shift its focus. I saw his hand working its way up and down his penis. I felt myself get wet. I tried to remember how Lance used to make me feel good and I tried to duplicate what he used to do.

Good thing I did not have a microphone attached to my computer.

He wanted to see my breasts. This time, I took my bra off. He told me to play with my nipples while I was fingering myself. I made sure that my face was out of the frame.

I came.

Once the summer was over, so was Em.

Here ends my relationship with Em. I felt satisfied.

I remember walking into the halls of the university during my first day of college. I was going to look for my classroom when I saw a familiar face walking down the halls.

It was Andre.

His arm was draped over another girl. I walked over to say hi.

Until now, we still greet each other when we cross paths in the hallway. I'm happy for him. He deserves someone who says "I love you" back.

Anyways, I met the guy who was assigned to show me around school. Let's say his name was Manuel.

MANUEL

Manuel was an average looking guy who was smart and practical. We hung out as friends and we went out to watch movies. After four months of knowing him, I invited him over to my house.

When he got to my house he brought with him a very big teddy bear. The three of us, Manuel, the teddy bear and I, sat outside my house. We were looking up the night sky.

"Do you want me to get you a star?" he asked.

"Um... okay?" I said.

He grabbed my arm.

Thinking back to this night, I want to tell Manuel, "Seriously, dude?" But that doesn't matter because at that night, he did make me feel like a star.

He then, turned to me and asked, "Would you be my girlfriend?"

"Yes." I said.

Up until this day, I still remain the only star in his night sky.

You might be wondering what sex with Manuel was like.

I wouldn't know.