Foolish Discrimination Judgment & Labels

Why do people get labeled? Is it ok to be labeled? Everyone wants to be a part of society, whether it’s at a personal level (clique of friends), community level (GLBT), or worldly (a part of a nationality). I used to think it was this incredible bond that one person (or group of people) has with another person, and in some ways, it still is… and I think it’s a beautiful thing to create a solid friendship with someone else (or someone’s)… labels can be good… it brings various people together… it shows support from one person to another… a strength of unity…. but then like everything else, there’s always a downside… they are simply just: Labels. Not only do they bring people together, but they also separate individuals from other individuals (because of differences).

Why do others on the “outside” still pass judgment? Is anyone really on the outside? They shouldn’t be if they are. Everyone is their own person, unless there is an exact identical twin, biological, physical, chemical, emotional, AND mental… then no one should be on the outside. Is it because they are feeling left out? Are their insecurities that bad, that they feel they have to bully someone (or a group of others) in order to feel better about themselves? What causes this behaviour? How far ahead does it get them? Does it make them feel better about themselves to put others down? Does it make them accomplish more in their own life? I wish I knew the answers and I may never know the answers… but it boils down to this: … we’re all running the same race… Sure some try to get ahead and that leaves others behind, but in the end it’s all about making it at the end of the day, whether it’s for our children, our pets, our friends, our spouses but more importantly, for ourselves.

Every culture / society has played a significant role in our past, without one, we wouldn’t be where we are today, it’s that simple. Everyone has contributed yesterday, will contribute today, and is going to contribute tomorrow.

Some of us are constantly looking out for other people; we ignore our own needs to help someone else. Admirable. But there comes a time in life (and it doesn’t matter for how long) that we become selfish… it’s in our nature. Being selfishness is not a bad thing. If you don’t look out for yourself, who will? Your friends? Your loved ones? What if their life is as hectic as yours? What if they have an emergency… then what? How are YOU going to take of anyone else, if you can’t even take care of yourself?

So, here we are, wandering through life, trying to find the meaning of life: What is the purpose? Where does it get us? How will it benefit us? We meet new people, and do the best we can to make it the most valuable friendship in the world. Sometimes they stay in our lives, other times they walk out… but walking out is not a bad thing either. Learn from the friendship, and grow from it. When someone walks out of your life, you can mourn over what was lost, but look at it as it makes room for another person to come into your life. Give them the gift of your friendship, your time, your kindness and compassion.

We look towards friends, family, peers, educators, and even religion to help guide us through life. If we try one method, and it doesn’t work, we move onto another. It doesn’t make it a bad way of living, it simply means it isn’t meant for us (either at this point in time, or at all… either way is okay). When we find someone that we think will benefit us, which we can relate to, it’s like this spark lights up in our world… we start and create friendships with others. We find common interests… it could be something as “insignificant” as dogs, or plants, or children, or something amazing and huge that we’re both from the same nationality, or both homosexual, or both go to the same school… whatever the common ground is, it’s there and it helps us reach out to others that have similar experiences as we do.

It’s a beautiful thing… but then why do others feel the need to label and judge? Cultures are beautiful; they hold a certain value and beauty in the world… but why not narrow it down even further to the person? Instead of learning about a particular culture (which I love doing), come down even further, ignore the labels, ignore the stereotypes, and learn about *someone else*. Forget that they are black, white, blue, green, orange or rainbow coloured. Forget that they are rich, poor, middle class, or homeless. Forget that they are blind, deaf, mute, hard of hearing, disabled, or mentally delayed. Forget every single label and every single stereotype. Look past their physical appearance and look inside of them.

I’ve been discriminated against, whether it’s because of my skin colour, or my religious beliefs, or my sexual preference or even because of my brother. It hurts so much to be labeled for something that is beyond my control. I lived the life of a straight woman, I lived the life of a Christian, neither of things are bad things, but they are not RIGHT for ME. I have to do what is right for ME. Why live an unhappy life? Obviously anyone can force change upon themselves so they are able to conform and fit in with what society wants them to be, or how they want them to act, but why would someone want to? If you don’t “fit in” others start judging: “Because of who you are, I don’t like you, you don’t fit in, and you don’t belong”. Even if you “fit in” one way, you will stand out another way, whether it be your appearance, your behaviour, your mannerisms, your tone, or your attitude. You cannot please everyone. The only person that needs your approval – is you.

Does judgment and discrimination happen? Yes. Should it happen? No.

While asking my cultural guru/mentor a question on religious boundaries, she brought up an amazing point: “I like learning about cultures, but I love the surprise of individuals and how they can defy a culture or explain a belief. ” In other words… take a second and learn about someone’s background, their history, their beliefs, and their culture… many of us can be ‘labeled’ in a specific category to help define society, but don’t forget to take that SECOND look and learn something about THEM, as a PERSON. See what defines them, as individuals.

Even if you don’t agree with them, doesn’t give you the right to judge them. You don’t like being judged, and labeled, so why would you judge and label someone else?

It doesn’t make you any better than someone else,

it makes you look rather foolish,

if you think about it.