That feeling that nobody understands you even if they try to, even if you want them to. |
It's a nice afternoon to be hanging out with friends outside. But it is out of the question, she is here. She looks around at the furniture in the elegant living room. Her eyes gazes on everything as she avoids the presence of the other person there. The girl is 14 years old, slouching on one of the comfortable sofas in the room. Right across her is a woman in her thirties or forties, studying her every move. "It's not your fault." the woman said. "You can tell me what happened." She steals a glance at the woman. Can you pour your heart out to someone you just met? For a millisecond, she considers it. "Things like this happen. But you should not feel bad about it." The girl suddenly loses her interest in the woman. She drowns out the sound of the voice speaking to her. She goes back to her own game of scanning every nook-and-cranny of the room they were both in. There were picture frames with happy faces on top of the TV cabinet. There were paintings of forests and waterfalls and oceans on the walls. There were ceramic vases perfectly perched on corners of the room. The carpet had a colorful print that brings out the color of the floor tiles, but stands out from it. The things that surround them are real. They are what they seem. They have no feelings. Nothing can hurt them. These inanimate things are far more engaging than what the woman has to say. The woman sighs. Nothing she says is touching a nerve. It is like speaking about the universal laws of love and life to a three year old. It doesn't matter if what you're saying can be valuable to them, they're just not into it. This is probably the longest hour of her day. She stops talking. She takes a pen and scribbles down her number on a piece of white paper. She tries to hand it over to the girl, who immediately snapped back to attention. "When you need me, and you feel that you are ready... talk to me." As she receives the paper, the girl looks at the woman with searching eyes that scare her. For a moment, the two of them are locked in a wordless conversation. They hear the door slam shut as someone parks outside and gets out of a car. It takes them away from each other's stare. The girl looks up and gives a small nod goodbye to the woman before she leaves. She couldn't wait to see her friends. |