Introduction

I am a 35 year old single mother of a 2 year old girl.  As I find myself researching my family tree I constantly wonder what where my ancestors like?  What were their dreams?  Hopes?  Strengths?  Weaknesses?  It makes me take a hard look at myself and where I am in my life.  Now it's time to look forward and try to do what I can to move forward and make positive changes. 

I live with my parents and find myself trying to pay off a loan that will enable me to live debt-free and maybe save some money instead of struggling from paycheck to paycheck.    My father helps out a lot and if something were to happen to him I find myself wondering if I'd be okay or end up on the streets.

I like my job, working in an office and the pay is okay but there is a level of frustration with a coworker who has no tact, sense of discretion or compassion.

I love my boyfriend but he is unemployed and lives at home with his parents.  He has a seven year old son that he gets every weekend.  He is a wonderful person but so laid back that there is no drive or motivation and most of the time I don't think he's even trying to find another job.  We've been together 7 months and he's not gone on one single interview.  He is wonderful to my daughter and his son is also wonderful to her but in the end will staying be any good for her?  Am I ever going to get anywhere in life with this individual?

My daughter's father recently moved to Alabama from New Jersey and provides NO assistance to me with our daughter.  He can barely support himself and never has any money to send to us.  He says that he loves her but once a month I was taking her to see him and paying for everything and whenever he gets angry he verbally attacks me personally.  He has physically attacked me in the past. 

I dream of one day owning a mobile home because on my own I will never be able to afford a house.  I dream of being able to save money and give my daughter a head start on money for college tuition.  I dream of being financially stable and having a wonderful relationship with her.

I don't believe in the power of love anymore,  I desperately try to believe in holding onto my dreams.