Life and getting older aone |
I realized now that I am older I have not put a future away for myself. I put all others in front of myself, I do not regret it and maybe if I had to do it all over again I may not used up all my time on others and I would have put a little away for myself. There I was eleven years ago and newly divorced after 18 years of marriage. I had thress kids and I was starting over. Since that time I have put everything I have into raising them. Then alone came two grandchildren and now one on the way. I admit I do things to the extreme. I would rather have time with the grandchildren than anyone else. Then on lonely days when everyone else is too busy for me I think for just a moment I wish I had someone to share the rest of life with. Then I wonder where I would fit them in. I could pencil them in between school, work, children and grandchildren. Maybe that is why I am alone. I have no time to devote to anyone else. I know that maybe one day someone will come alone and if they do I will try and have time for them. My family is important to me and I am so happy just to be apart of thier lives. |