Destiny

It felt exhilarating and wrong all at the same time. The snow was falling. For most of the day, it whirled and blew as it fell, bouncing along sidewalks and streets, eventually trapped and stilled by the cities immovable buildings. It was cold and yet I could feel the uncomfortable moistness of my shirt as the sweat cooled and then brushed back against my skin with each anticipated step. It was Christmas.

They said she was a superstar, the queen of the city, hell the queen of the world now. True enough, you couldn’t walk three blocks without seeing her photograph, enormous, smiling from a billboard; her beautiful figure reproduced on the side of a city bus. Her name printed on the tee shirts of adolescent boys. But I knew the truth. Saw the trap that she’d been captured in. I understood that she was suffocating and lost, that she desperately needed someone to show her the way out.

I knew it was me. And she knew it to, when two years before we met eyes at that small café. Nothing happens by chance in this world. She and I together at that one point in history was no mistake. Her smile, in just that brief second, spoke a million words to me. It told me she felt what I felt. It told me she wanted, needed my help.

I’d watched from afar for so long now, carefully avoiding the throng of desperate people that constantly surrounded her. I’d been patient for her sake. Wishing that fate would grant us another private moment, just another brief chance for me to let her know that she would soon be safe. For two long years, she’d been forced to endure and I’d been forced to bear the guilt of my inability while I searched for the opportunity we both were waiting for.

And here it was. The party was publicized in all the papers. Seems every one of the idols that this starving city worshiped would be there. There had been other parties. None were at a building where I’d worked, where I’d been given a key, where I still kept that key. This was the way fate had chosen to reward me. To reward us.

Hundreds of pathetic gawkers milled about, held back from the red carpet by bulky men in black tuxedos carrying ominous frowns. The limos lined up like a winding snake, the stars in fancy diamonds and million dollar dresses quickly ushered in the door avoiding the snow, the people, the flashes. I avoided all that too. The maintenance door was in the back, the alley lined with trash and graffiti; a stark contrast to the bright lights and pristine decorations on display around the corner. Most things had a pretty face but were darker and dirtier in the back.

When I entered the grand room full of dancing light and sound my confidence had never been higher. The new suit I’d purchased impeccably matched even the best clothing of the beautiful people surrounding me. I walked forward and there she was in the middle of the room. Over the shoulder of the woman she was talking to, she looked up. Our eyes met once again. Her face changed quickly from the fake, happy expression she wore in public to the honest expression of fear that I knew she only felt safe enough to share with me. Like that day in the café, her lips once again spoke a million words and I knew for sure things would soon be ok.