Life Sucks and The You Live Forever

Chapter 1
“Where do you think you’re going?” Jake's unexpected voice in her ear made Nessie gasp with surprise. Where did he come from?

“I’m going hunting.” She tried to sound casual so he wouldn’t guess that she planned to actually leave the compound. “Sure, sure, right after we go back to the tree house and tell your old lady where we’re going.” Jacob grinned at her, obviously teasing.

“No Jake, I want to go by myself.” She knew it was useless, but she had to try. “If you don’t let me go, I’ll tell mom you called her an old lady again.”

Jake laughed out loud so Nessie scampered up his huge body to put her hands over his mouth. “Shush Jacob! They’ll hear you!” She could feel the muscles of his face twitch behind her hands as he tried not to laugh. He snorted, making her giggle. "What's so funny, Jake?"

"You looked so much like a little monkey just now. Nessie wiggled around to get a better look at his face, digging her bare feet into the muscles covering his ribs. "Hey, that tickles!"

"Ha! Better you than me, Dog Boy!”

“Dog Boy?” Jake chuckled. “You’ve been hanging out with Rosalie too much. What am I gonna do with you?”

Jake continued to laugh as he pulled her off his body, grabbed her feet, and held her upside down with one hand. Nessie grabbed the hem of her shirt before it could slide up past her belly and tucked it into her shorts. Using her stomach muscles, she pulled her body into a pike and whipped open like a gymnast.

Jake anticipated her move and tossed her into the air. Nessie somersaulted a couple of times and landed several yards closer to the gate, crouched and ready to run.

Jake quit laughing and puffed out his cheeks as he exhaled. “Aw Nessie, you know you can’t go outside alone, and don’t tell me you were going to hunt inside the compound, we both know there’s nothing left in here you actually want.”

He was right, of course. There had only been one carnivore trapped within the compound the day they finished the fence. She hated the taste of herbivores! Yuck! The meat eaters were so much better. Not as good as Jake's blood, though.

Oh no, why did I have to think about Jake's blood? Nessie's pupils dilated, her nostrils flared, and her mouth filled with saliva.

She wasn’t supposed to bite Jake anymore. What a stupid rule! She never lost control with Jake, never took more than a few little sips, and Jake didn’t mind, (In fact he seemed to enjoy it as much as she did). So what was the problem? Geez!

As if he were reading her mind, Jake closed the distance between them in three strides and scooped her up, holding her like a baby. With his eyebrows raised and a slight smile curving the corners of his mouth, he offered her his wrist. “Are you really thirsty again so soon? Or do you just enjoy being naughty?”

It was hard to ignore the scent of his blood pulsing right under her nose. Her lips parted and she shivered with desire. NO! I will not be distracted! I am getting out of here tonight! She pushed his arm away, before her resolve weakened.

“You go by yourself all the time!” She squirmed around until she could wrap her legs around his waist and balled her hands into fists. She thumped him on the chest to help make her point.

“You were going to go by yourself tonight, weren’t you! Why can’t I have any ‘alone time’? Everyone else gets to go out by themselves!”

Nessie felt the frustration drain away with each ineffective thump of her fists. Jake snuggled her into his hard warm chest, his heart beat resonating against her. It was just a whisper when she grumbled into the side of his neck, “or hide behind locked doors all night.”

Jake’s body shook as he tried not to laugh. He slid his hands down to her waist leaned away from her and looked directly into her eyes.

“How about we go together and I’ll be so sneaky, you won’t even know I’m there. I did sneak up on you tonight, didn’t I? Besides, Alice can’t see you at all if you’re with me.” Jake grinned at her and she had to agree. He was right about Alice.

“It would be just my luck to get past Dad and have Alice sneak a peek at my future!” She growled quietly in frustration and muttered, “Damn it to hell!” She could tell Jake was trying not to laugh again.

"Are you laughing at me, Jacob Black? Would you rather I adopt some of your vocabulary? Let's see... 'Jake's word for the day' is...”

Jake's hand was suddenly clamped over her mouth. The look on his face was comical, but left no room for doubt—this conversation was over.

“Alright, fine.” Nessie sighed and jumped out of Jake’s arms. She held his hand while she waited for him to punch in the code for the alarm system. Is he humoring me, or did he actually forget about informing Mom and Dad?

Nessie felt a twinge of guilt for deceiving her parents. She knew the reason they had to live here, completely isolated from the rest of the world. They had to hide her from Aro and his sadistic experiments on vampire-human hybrids. She shivered involuntarily as she thought of the ancient vampire.

"So kiddo, how did you manage to sneak out with out your dad catching you?"

Guess it didn't slip his mind after all. "I meditated and pretended I was having a dream."

"Seriously? That actually worked?” The surprised look on Jake's face was a little insulting.

"Well, duh. I'm here aren't I?” She stuck her chin in the air and tossed her curls over her shoulder imitating Rosalie’s favorite pose. Jake didn’t seem to notice, so she dropped the attitude.

"What did you do exactly? Go into a trance or something?"

"Yeah, I've been practicing for awhile.” Nessie couldn’t keep the excitement and pride out of her voice. “I did a little sleep walking to test it out and no one noticed. I thought what the heck, I might as well go do something fun."

"Is that why you’re so hell-bent on sneaking out—all alone into the jungle, at night, no one knowing where you are and no one to protect you—For Fun?" Uh-oh, it sounded like Jake was slipping into parental mode. She hated it when he did that.

"I don't know Jake, I just feel so tense all the time lately. Hunting makes me feel better. Besides, I really am thirsty." She turned on the charm—pushing her lower lip out just a bit—and peeked at him from under her lashes. She learned that trick from Alice.

Jake shook his head and grinned. "Then what are we waiting for? Let’s go!"

Nessie took off into the jungle at top speed, the thrill of the hunt pulsing in her veins. The slipstream she created as she ran lifted the heavy hair from her damp neck and back—tugging at her curls, stretching them out in waves behind her.

She wanted blood, and she wanted the blood of a predator. She didn't find it. The only scent she found even remotely appetizing was several days old.

Nessie gave up and began tracking one of the many feral pig trails. They were even more plentiful than the deer back in Washington. It didn't take her long to find, kill and drain one. Her thirst was satisfied, but not her craving.

She sat on the ground, and began picking twigs, leaves, and an occasional bug out of her tangled hair. She had to get cleaned up before Rose and Alice could see her. They already called her “wild child” and complained constantly about her appearance.

Nessie had traded dresses and bows for t-shirts and cutoffs the day she won her emancipation from the fashion police. It was a hard fought battle. Jake, Edward, Bella and Nessie insisted she was old enough to make her own decisions about what to wear. Rose and Alice did not agree. Nessie usually wore her hair in a long braid down her back. Tonight she had let it fly freely as she ran through the jungle, enjoying the feeling. She would pay for that momentary pleasure with hours of untangling mats. She would ask Jake to help her; he was a lot more patient than anyone else in the family when it came to brushing and combing her hair.

She watched Jake quickly clean and field dress the pig. He wiped the blade of his knife on the ground before putting it away. When he looked up, he caught her staring at him, but he just smiled and said, "Mm, roast pig!"

"That's just gross Jake!"

"To each his own, Nessie.” Jake laughed and started humming to himself as he gathered material for a fire.

Rocking back and forth hugging her knees, Nessie watched Jake work. She knew every plane and angle of his face by touch as well as sight. When the small pile of kindling finally started to smoke, Jake leaned in close with pursed lips and blew gently.

“I'll bet that's how he looks when he kisses someone.” Nessie traced her lower lip slowly with her fingertips. “I wonder what it feels like to be kissed like that?”

The flame gradually increased and ignited the larger twigs and sticks and eventually a couple of small logs. The campfire threw alternating patterns of light and shadow across Jake's body. Nessie's eyes grew heavy, but she continued to study Jake as he tended the fire and prepared his meal.

"Jake?” Her voice sounded tired and a little dreamy even to her own ears.

He stopped immediately and looked up at her, his dark brown eyes sparkling with reflected light from the fire.

"Your eyes are so pretty, Jacob.” His smile lit up his whole face. Nessie felt her cheeks blush and hoped Jake hadn’t noticed.

"Thank you Nessie, so are yours. Are you getting tired sweetheart?"

"No, not really.” The huge yawn that escaped her made them both laugh. Jake stood up and kicked dirt over the fire, extinguishing it immediately.

"Jake! Why did you do that? It took you so long to get it started and you haven't even cooked your pig yet!"

"Well, I'm a little tired too and we need to get back before someone notices you’re missing. Have you thought about how you are going to sneak back in?"

"The same way I got out, meditation."

"How about tomorrow? Are you going meditate all day?"

"Um, I hadn't really thought about it… Crap.”

"I'll make you a deal Nessie, if you promise to never sneak out alone, I'll tell you how I hide my thoughts from Edward."

"Does that mean you'll sneak out with me?"

"Maybe. Do I have your word?"

"Sure" I can work with a 'maybe' no problem.

Nessie was having a dreadfully bad day. Jake, Alice and Jasper were off on another pointless reconnaissance mission. When would they realize they were never going to find Nahuel, or his sisters? None of her usual pastimes could hold her attention for more than a few minutes. She thought about working on the watercolor she started last week, but was afraid in her present mood she would only ruin it. Jacob, I need you!

“Hey Little Spider, where are you?

“Crap! Emmett. Why can't he just leave me alone.”

“Come out, come out where ever you are,” he called in an irritating singsong voice. “I wanna see how long I can tickle you before you pee your pants.”

Nessie snarled at him and yelled, “Bite me!” before ducking into her room and slamming the door. She ground her teeth and slid down the wall. It hurt when her butt hit the floor and jarred every joint in her body.

The growing pains were terrible today. Worse than the day all her permanent teeth came through. When would it end? When would she be done growing? The pain, the confinement, Jake’s absence, Emmett’s idiotic teasing, all of it was just too much to bear!

Nessie felt her frustration as a physical manifestation. The air was heavy and oppressive making it hard to breathe. She could feel the room closing in on her as she started to hyperventilate.

When she couldn’t stand it any longer, she climbed out her window and began to scurry down the branches. Knowing Jake would be back soon, she decided to just go wait for him by the gate.

As she dropped to the ground from the lowest branch, Emmett appeared out of nowhere, grabbed her around the waist, and started tickling her.

“Ha! I got you at last, Little Spider!” She could feel her self-control slipping. “You wanna know why I call you little spider?”

She was going to lose her temper big time if he didn’t stop it. “Not really,” She growled through clenched teeth, feeling the rage build as he continued to tickle her.

“It’s because your arms and legs are so long you look like a four legged spider.”

That’s all it took. She lost control completely. She actually saw red, snarled at him from deep in her belly, and bit him.

Chapter 2
If Emmett didn’t have such amazing reflexes, it would have been a lot worse. Emmett’s howl of surprise and pain was still ringing in her ears as the red haze began to fade. His face was pure white; his eyes wide in shocked disbelief and pain.

“Nessie? Why did you…? Oh, man…. Nessie, are you okay?”

“You’re asking if I’m okay? I attacked you, and you want to know if I’m okay? What have I done!” Nessie was shaking from head to toe, too stunned to speak. The all-consuming rage was instantly replaced with shame and fear.

Emmett was cradling his hand, his face twisted in agony when Jake came crashing into view.

“What happened? Nessie are you okay?” “Oh no, Jake’s back. Did he see what I did? Oh please, I just want to die!”

“I said WHAT HAPPENED!” Jake was glaring at Emmett as he roared out his question.

Nessie hung her head in shame. “I bit off Emmett’s finger.” It was barely a whisper.

Jake’s face suddenly looked as shocked as Emmett’s and almost as pale. “What? What was that?”

“I said, I bit off Emmett’s finger!” Quite a bit louder that time.

“Why?” Jake’s eyes were darting back and forth between Nessie’s face and Emmett’s.

Emmett grimaced and answered through clenched teeth. “It was my fault, I was teasing her and I guess I just went too far with it.”

“Nessie?” The disappointment in Jake’s voice crushed her. She felt her stomach heave and had to swallow back the bile in her throat. She wanted the ground to open up and swallow her. She wanted the house, as well as the tree it was in, to fall down upon her and bury her along with her shame.

“Where are your parents Renesmee? We need to talk to them.” Jake sounded tired as well as extremely sad.

“Jake, man, it’s alright. Just hand me my finger will ya? I can reattach it.” Emmett was sitting on the ground, panting in pain. “Edward, Rose, and Bella are helping Carlisle and Esme install the new generator over on the east side of the complex. They should've been back by now.”

Jake didn’t even flinch when he retrieved the severed digit out of the dirt and handed it to Emmett. Nessie felt her knees buckle, but Jake caught her before she hit the ground that was rushing towards her face.

Nessie could hear the hushed sounds of worried voices, but she couldn't understand the words, they sounded so distant and distorted, as though she were underwater. What happened?

The first thing she was fully aware of was Jacob’s warm, comforting scent. He was cradling her against him with her head directly over his heart. The sound of his heartbeat always soothed her. What she felt now was something more. It felt as though Jake’s strong powerful heart was pumping courage and strength directly into her body.

“Nessie baby, open your eyes.” She tried, but her eyelids were so heavy. Nessie was pretty sure she didn’t want to open them anyway. Ever. “Come on Nessie, wake up sweetheart.” She could hear the concern in his voice. Feel his calloused palm tenderly patting her face. She slowly opened her eyes and saw a look of relief spread across Jake’s face.

The other voices became clearer and more distinct. She heard Emmett arguing with her dad. “Oh come on Edward, no blood no foul, right?”

“Joking about your lack of a functional circulatory system is not helpful, Emmett. This is serious!” Edward was speaking through clenched teeth, obviously distressed.

“I don’t understand Carlisle.” Bella whispered. “Why would she attack him for such a trivial thing? That is so out of character! Even if he had been hurting her, she never would have bitten him. Do you think something is seriously wrong with her.” Bella’s voice was full of panic.

“Don’t worry Bella, I’ll give her a complete physical. I’m sure she is going to be fine.” A lot of human girls go through severe mood swings right before puberty, maybe that’s all this is.”

“Come on Carlisle, don’t you think she’s a little young for that!”

“Why don’t we discuss it a little later, Bella, I think our girl is awake now.”

Oh man, this is going to be bad!

It was just as bad as she thought it was going to be. Maybe even a little worse. Once everyone was convinced she wasn’t mentally ill, but had indeed just had a major temper tantrum; she was subjected to the full force of her parents’ wrath. They never raised their voices, but somehow that made it even worse.

Emmett and Jake were waiting outside her parents’ room when they finally let her out.

“I’m so sorry Ness…”

“Please don’t apologize. I don’t think I can take it. I just want to say... I mean... I... Oh Uncle Em! I’m so sorry!” Nessie flew into Emmett’s arms and sobbed.

He patted her back awkwardly with his uninjured hand, repeating, “There, there, it’s okay. Don’t cry, please don’t cry.”

Nessie was so ashamed of herself that she didn’t mind the isolation of her room one bit. She dove into bed face first and cried into her pillow for the first hour. She knew Jake was waiting silently just outside her room, and he would stay there until she came out. His scent, rhythmic breathing, and heartbeat helped soothe her. Finally exhausted, she rolled onto her back and stared at the ceiling trying to figure out just what the heck was wrong with her. Nessie wasn’t sure just how long she had been in her room when Jake knocked on her door. She pulled her pillow over her head and mumbled, “Go away, Jake.”

“Not likely, sweetie. Come on Nessie, you can’t hide in there forever. Please? I miss you.” He sounded so sad. Why do I have to make everyone so miserable? What is wrong with me!

With her pillow still pressed into her face, and fighting the tears that threatened to return, she managed a shaky, “Okay, come in.”

As Jake opened her door; Nessie peeked out from behind her pillow. He leaned against the wall just inside the door and slid to the floor. Jake rested his elbows on his bent knees and held his head in his hands. Nessie flipped over onto her tummy fluffed her pillow and punched it once before laying back down facing Jake. She just looked at him without saying a word. She couldn't remember Jake looking so tired. That's right, he just got back from recon. How self-absorbed can I be? He must be exhausted.

Nessie got up from her bed and crossed the room to Jake. She knelt in front of him and placed her palm on his cheek. She projected an image of Jake asleep, his arms and legs hanging over the edges of her too small bed, while she sat on the floor and wrote letters.

Jake smiled and laughed quietly. "That sounds great kiddo."

Nessie wrote formal apologies, not only to Emmett, but to each member of the family. Jake's letter was surprisingly the most difficult to write. She folded it into an origami heart and slipped it into his hip pocket. She was afraid he might wake up, but he was so tired he wasn't even snoring.

It was almost dark before Jake woke up, yawning and stretching. "How long was I out, Nessi?"

"Just a couple of hours."

"Why didn't you wake me up? I'm not much company when I'm asleep."

"You were just so tired, Jake. I needed to write those apologies anyway so it worked out fine. You were gone when I got up. What time did you leave anyway? How far did you go today? Any sign of Nahuel?"

"Well the answers are: an hour before sunrise, 150 miles, and no." Jake smiled, teasing her just a little for the unbroken string of questions.

"So, what are the terms of your sentence?" Jake was no longer smiling.

"I'm grounded to the tree-house except for hunting until further notice, I had to write formal letters of apology to everyone, and I have to spend an hour everyday in my room completely alone, with out any company, not even you." Nessie knew the punishment wasn't too harsh, in fact she deserved worse, but her lip started to quiver as she thought of all the long boring days ahead of her.

"Come here sweetie." Nessie jumped into Jake's open arms. Clinging to him as she squeezed her eyes shut trying not to cry. Jake patted her back and said, "It's gonna be hard on me too, but I guess we'll both have to find something to do for an hour a day by ourselves. It will give you a chance to get caught up on your school work. How far behind are you now?" Jake asked with a chuckle.

"Very funny Jake. Ha. Ha. I just need a couple more science classes and I'll have my GED. Maybe it will give you a chance to catch up on your school work."

"Sorry I mentioned it. Well, I'm off to bed... Hey, what's this?" Jake started to pull Nessie's note out of his back pocket.

"Wait till you get to your room to read it, please." Nessie blushed. "It's just your apology note."

Jake tucked the note deeper into his pocket and patted it twice. He yawned as he leaned over and kissed her forehead. "Sure, sure. Love ya kid, Goodnight, Nessie."

"Love you too, Jake. Good night."

“Come on Nessie, its not that bad. See?” Jake smacked his lips as he devoured an entire steak. “Oh man that was good!”

“Glad you're enjoying yourself, Jake. Don't mind me I'll just sit here and gag, OK?”

Nessie felt resentment build as she listened to the rest of the family enjoying their pastimes and hobbies. Nessie was sick of the entire tree house to which she had been confined for the last month. Tonight; however, she wished she were with the rest of the vampires in one of the rooms scattered throughout the branches of the tree. She would even go back to her tiny, claustrophobic room if it meant she could get out of Kitchen Night!

Nessie always dreaded the weekly ritual of cooking and eating a human meal with Jake. This must be the freak show equivalent of Family Home Evening. Or maybe it’s just her own personal hell. The smell of Jake’s dinner was making her nauseous.

Jake cut off a small piece of raw meat and offered it to her on a fork, waving it back and forth under her nose. Nessie felt her temper flare as she tried not to gag. “Come on Nessie, open up. I didn’t even cook yours. See? Just try it baby; you might even like it this time. Do if for me OK?”

“WHAT THE HELL JAKE? Did you get that straight out of ‘Green Eggs and Ham’?” Even the hurt, shocked look on his face wasn’t enough to cool her rage, or stop her tirade.

“I am not a baby! And I am not going to eat any more nasty human food until every body else does! You don’t see my parents in here eating do you? Well, do you? What about Rosalie or even Emmett? Of course not! I know you could eat this disgusting, decomposing bovine flesh every single night Jake, but that doesn’t count because you actually like it!”

Nessie was so angry she didn’t realize she had an audience until it was too late. Most of the family was standing in the kitchen, frozen in shock.

“Stop staring at me like I’m some kind of freak!” Nessie screamed as she took off running. She heard her father’s voice, “No, Bella. Let her go. She just needs a little time to herself. You too Jake, stay! Let her work through something on her own for once.”

“Of course she’ll stay inside the perimeter. She knows better than to leave the compound.” Edward said, loud enough to be sure she could still hear him.

Oh yeah? Nessie thought about running as fast and as far into the jungle as she could, but decided she was in enough trouble as it was. Fine, I’ll stay inside.

“Well, I calmed down, but I’m not fine.” Nessie whispered to herself, almost hoping some one would hear her. After running the perimeter of the compound twice, her joints began to ache. Growing pains were something she just had to live with. I should be used to it by now.

She wasn’t quite ready to face anyone, especially Jake, so she darted up a nearby tree. She had been sitting in the uppermost branches for about 20 minutes. She was fairly certain that the only person who would come looking for her this soon after her little fit, would be Jake. That’s why she was at the very top of the canopy. The branches up here were too thin to support his considerable weight. She just didn’t want to face him after that horrible scene in the kitchen. She moaned softly, Who do I think I'm I kidding anyway? All I want is to be held in Jake’s arms, snuggle into his chest, and listen to his heartbeat.

“What is wrong with me?” a little louder that time. She could feel fresh tears pricking the corners of her eyes.

She felt the tree shake as Jake jumped into the lower branches. “There’s nothing wrong with you sweetheart! You’re perfect.”

“Oh Jake, I’m so sorry!” she sobbed.

“I know you didn’t mean it Nessie, now come down here where I can reach you. We both need a hug.”

She practically flew down the tree; dropping from branch to branch faster than if she had fallen.

Jake grabbed her out of thin air, and clasped her tightly to his chest. He let her cry all over his soft, clean, t-shirt till she felt completely drained. Would this horrible day never end? They were only about thirty feet off the ground, so when she said, “Lets go home, I need to apologize some more.” Jake just tossed her onto his back and jumped.

She barely felt the impact of landing. Jake was just as graceful and strong as any vampire. “Are you sure sweetheart? We could go for a run first.”

That actually sounded really nice. “Yeah, lets go.”

Jake grabbed her from his back, flipped her over his shoulder, and tossed her into the air once before setting her down. “Wanna race?” he asked with a grin.

“Not this time. In fact, I was wondering if I could ask you for a special favor?” Nessie blushed, knowing that it was a very childish request.

Jake looked more than a little confused, but quickly agreed. “What ever you want is always fine by me. You know that, don’t you?”

Nessie smiled sadly and said, “I want to NOT eat human food.” When Jake’s smile disappeared, she quickly continued, “But that isn’t the favor I wanted to ask you.”

“I’m sorry if I insulted you tonight. I know you aren’t a baby. I don’t know how else to get you to eat! I wish you didn’t have to eat human food at all Nessie, but it’s important to feed the human half of you as well.”

She sighed, “That’s another thing I want what I can’t ever have. I want to be whole. I’m tired of being only half vampire, or half human. I wish I could be a werewolf like you! I hate being such a freak.” Damn it here come the tears again. Get a grip already!

Jake took her face in his hands as he knelt in front of her, forcing her to look into his eyes. “Nessie, you are not a freak! You are my favorite person in the whole world. You are smart, kind, thoughtful, generous, sweet, funny, beautiful, and …”

Nessie froze, her mouth parting into a shy smile. Wait a minute! Did Jake actually say I was beautiful? Everyone was always telling her she was cute, or even pretty, especially Alice and Rose when they wanted to dress her up. Nessie’s face flushed with a strange mixture of pleasure and embarrassment. “Jake, did you um, just say that I was beautiful?”

He tousled her hair and said, “You are even more beautiful than Rosalie, but don’t tell her I said that, it might hurt her feelings. Now, what was the special favor you wanted to ask?”

Nessie blushed again and reached for Jake’s face so she could press her palm to his cheek. It was so much easier to just show him. When embarrassed, confused, or anxious, she always resorted to her earliest form of communication.

Jake grinned so big it looked like his face would break. “Of course! Nessie, you’ll never get too big for that, I just thought you no longer enjoyed it.” She returned his smile before turning her back, and laughed out loud.

Nessie forgot all her problems and her heart filled with joy as she flew through the jungle, clinging to the back of a giant russet wolf.

Chapter 3
Jake had been running for hours when Nessie’s body stiffened in pain. He slid to a stop, leaving deep gouges in the dirt with his claws and lowered himself to the ground. Nessie slide off his back and sank to her knees. Jake immediately phased and jerked his shorts on.

He placed his hand on her forehead and asked, “What’s going on Sweetie? Do you have a fever? You feel a little warmer than usual. Your heart rate is a little elevated, but not much.”

“Jake, stop it. I don’t know, I’ve never had a fever before, but yeah, now that you mention it, I do feel kind of hot. I also feel really… I don’t know, irritable I guess.” She bit her lower lip and dropped her gaze to the ground as she thought about her violent mood swings. Irritable didn’t even begin to cover it. “The littlest things really annoy me. I cry at things I used to just laugh at. I get really mad about the stupidest things. It seems like I’m always screaming at Uncle Emmett to “bite me.” She felt her face flush bright red with shame. She was the one doing all the biting. “But right now, the main thing that’s bugging me, is my stomach hurts.”

She was in Jake’s arms and flying through the jungle on the way back to the compound before she even knew what happened.

“Jake stop, I just want to talk about it a little.”

“You can talk while I run.” Nessie could hear and feel Jake’s heart pounding with what could only be fear. She knew he could run for miles without breaking a sweat. “I think we need to get you back, so Carlisle can have a look at you.”

“No Jake! That’s what I’m afraid of! I don’t want to be poked and prodded all night! Those titanium needles really hurt!” There weren’t many things that could pierce her deceptively tough skin. They had tried making all sorts of needles just to get a sample of her blood that wasn’t contaminated with Jake’s saliva. His bite was the only one that wasn’t venomous except for hers and she refused to bite herself. Jake had refused to bite her as well, unless it was an “emergency”. It was obvious that Jake considered this an emergency. It didn’t matter whether it was or not, Carlisle had a huge supply of his custom made needles.

Everyone was sitting around the conference table when they got back. That was weird. They were usually scattered all over the tree by this time of night. Oh no! Nessie suddenly remembered her Dad saying, “She knows better than to leave the compound.” as she was running away from that horrible scene in the kitchen. Crap! She hadn’t even thought about it after Jacob coaxed her down from the tree. They had been gone for hours.

Nessie risked a quick glance at Edward and he winked at her. What? Edward shook his head “no” almost imperceptibly. Am in trouble? He again signaled “no”. That’s a relief! Thanks, Dad.

Rose was sitting in Emmett’s lap, Carlisle and Esme were whispering quietly, Alice had her head in her hands, and Jasper was rubbing the back of her neck while he concentrated on controlling the mood in the room. Nessie and Jacob felt it the minute they got through the door. Peace – calm - comfort. Alice obviously had a really bad headache, the result of trying to see Nessie’s future. Why is she still trying to see my future? Maybe I’m seriously sick?

“Nessie, you aren’t sick, you’re just growing up.” Edward said soothingly, and then looked at Jacob. “Go pack your gear; all the men are going on a camping trip.”

“No, I’m not going anywhere! Not till I find out what’s wrong with Nessie.”

“Jacob, she’s fine. We’ll talk about in the Jeep.”

“Her stomach hurts! It could be appendicitis or some…”

Carlisle interrupted Jake, smiled kindly at Nessie and said, “Come here for a minute sweetie. Can you show me where it hurts?”

Nessie placed her hand over her lower abdominal muscles. “Right here.”

“Mm hm. Can you describe the pain for me?”

“I guess so, yeah. Its kind of how I felt after being forced to eat those nasty berries last month, only the pain is lower and not as bad, and I’m pretty sure I’m not going to puke.” That had not been fun! Spewing berry juice all over the kitchen floor had gotten every one extremely worried. Not to mention the mess. Gross!

Carlisle pressed different parts of her tummy while questioning her, “Does it feel like a dull ache, or sharp and stabbing, or maybe more like cramping.”

“Yeah, it definitely feels like cramps.”

“I believe Alice has made the correct diagnosis. Nessie is perfectly healthy. She is indeed growing up.”

“But the cramps…” Jacob stopped mid sentence with a blank look on his face, and merely said, “Oh.”

Suddenly Jacob was very excited about the camping trip. All the guys were gone in less than 5 minutes.

“Alice are you absolutely sure? You know how subjective your visions can be. She is just so young!”

“Yes, Bella, I’m sure. This is not something you choose, it just happens. Like the weather, I’m always right about the weather.”

Great, now we’re going to discuss the weather? What is going on!”

Alice turned to look at Nessie. “Nessie, how old are you now?”

Okay, from the weather to my age, why does everyone worry so much about my age? It’s freaking hilarious. No one in my entire family has a realistic age! Three hundred year old Carlisle tries so hard to look older, but he barely passes for thirty. Dad is almost one hundred years older than Mom, but they’ll both be teenagers forever…

“Umm… it’s not a difficult question Nessie.” Alice was still waiting for an answer.

“Actual age, or earth years?”

Alice just smirked, raised her eyebrows, and waited. Nessie knew no one counted Earth years except her mom. “My actual age is fourteen, but I’m due for an update next week.”

“Did you hear that, Bella? Fourteen.”

The Actual Age Updates were Carlisle’s idea. Nessie had grown from a tiny seed to a fully formed infant in less than two months. She was born with a full set of teeth, and she could talk when she was only a week old. At three months, she could run. She had read the entire Harry Potter series twice before her first birthday.

Everyone, except Bella, agreed that it made more sense to calculate Nessie’s “Actual Age” by evaluating her physical, intellectual, and emotional growth. She wasn’t too crazy about the updates; it involved those darn needles and lots of boring academic and psychological tests. The only good thing about the constant updates, was every time she passed a major benchmark, Alice would throw a party.

“How much biology have you studied Nessie?” Alice’s voice interrupted her thoughts.

“Not much, why? Dad says I need to master calculus, geology, chemistry, and physics first. Besides, I like fine art, music, and history much more than the sciences. So I don’t really care.”

“This is crazy! But it also sounds just like Edward! We need to put someone else in charge of your education.” Alice paused, and asked, “Has anyone talked to you about puberty or menstrual cycles?”

“Well, I think puberty is when humans are old enough to make babies. But I haven’t heard anything about men’s true cycles.”

“Oh dear,” Alice sighed. “I can’t believe this!” Alice narrowed her eyes and shot a reproachful glance at Bella. She turned back to Nessie and then kindly asked, “Do you know how babies are conceived?”

“Alice! One thing at a time.” Bella pleaded, but it was Rose that looked the most upset.

“Sure, sure, everyone knows that.” Come on Alice! “The father puts a seed in the mother’s abdominal cavity and it grows into an embryo, then a fetus, and when it finally develops into an infant, it’s ready for surgical removal.”

“Where did you hear that theory?”

“Aunt Rose.” Alice, Bella, and Esme all looked at Rose with identical expressions of incredulity.

“Sorry, but that was basically the story I got the first time I asked. Only instead of ‘surgical’ removal, the midwife came and helped get the baby out through the belly button. I knew Nessie wouldn’t believe that. To be fair, Nessie’s actual age at the time was only nine.”

“Will somebody please tell me what is going on?” Nessie begged.

Alice darted up to Carlisle’s study and was back in less than a second inserting a DVD into the AV system.

“I thought we might be needing this soon, so I picked it up on my last trip into town as well as a few supplies. Why don’t we all watch this together and then we can answer any questions Renesmee might have.”

Could this have been any more embarrassing? The content of the DVD was presented in an over simplified manner, so she still had quite a few questions about the details of human physiology and reproduction. She just didn’t feel like asking them at the moment. No, what she really wanted to do was give Rosalie a piece of her mind. Why had she told me that stupid story about planting seeds?

Chapter 4
There’s just no way to hide the scent of blood from a house full of Vampires. Nessie woke up with bad cramps surrounded by all the women in the family. Esme, Alice and Rose were beaming at her, and Bella was trying hard to smile, not quite pulling it off.

Alice leaped gracefully onto her bed and held out two boxes. “Which do you prefer Nessie? Pads or…?” Before she could finish the question, Esme, Rose, and Bella all exclaimed, “Pads!”

They all started to laugh, even Bella. Nessie might have gotten mad at them for laughing at her but it was such a relief to see her mom smile again, that she joined in and laughed until she cried. Then she cried. For real. She didn’t know why she was crying but she was.

Bella hugged her and said “It’s OK baby, its just hormones.”

After she showered and got dressed, she was afraid to go out into the common area where everyone hangs out when they aren’t in their rooms. Alice knocked on her door and then waltzed in without waiting for an invitation. Nessie looked at her with reproach, but Alice just smiled and said, “You were going to invite me in another 13 seconds. Come on! Lets go! Were going to have a party!”

Nessie usually loved parties, but she didn’t want to leave her room just yet. “Not today Alice, I think I’ll just hang out in my room, OK?”

“No it is not OK! I refuse to let you start acting like your mother! Now come on!”

Alice proceeded to drag her into the commons. She had cards and presents from everyone, even the guys. Everyone knew she had to open Alice’s gift first, even Alice, but she still bounced around on her toes chanting, “Mine first! Mine first!”

Nessie lifted the lid, and pulled back several layers of pastel tissue paper. She didn’t recognize the lacey little scraps of fabric at first. Pink, purple, red, black and white seemed to float on air inside the box. Nessie’s face turned bright red as Alice plucked one of the items out of the box and held it up to her chest as if checking to see if it fit.

“Alice! That is not appropriate for….”

“Oh come on Bella! She isn’t a little girl anymore! And you have to agree that these little bras and panties are quite modest, yet still feminine…”

“Thank you Alice” Nessie gushed just to make her stop talking about underwear! Nessie figured that Alice must have seen what was going to happen at least three weeks ago. They lived so far away from civilization that the simplest shopping trip required days of travel; Alice still managed to drag Jasper into town about once a month. Nessie blushed thinking about Uncle Jasper tagging along behind Alice while she shopped and, no doubt, gave a running commentary of why these purchases were being made.

“Aunt Alice, when did you know that this was going to happen? I mean, it would have been nice to have a little more warning.”

“Nessie, when was the last time you looked in a mirror? I didn’t have to see the future to know this event was imminent.” Alice looked at Bella with a smug little smirk on her face and chided, “Anyone who was paying attention could have told you what was happening.”

“Nessie, open mine and Uncle Emmett’s next.” Rose handed her a small black velvet box. Nessie sighed in pleasure as she lifted a single emerald suspended from a delicate silver chain.

“It’s beautiful, Aunt Rose. Thank you so much!”

“It was Emmett’s idea. It belonged to his grandmother, and he really wanted you to have it.”

“But, Aunt Rose, shouldn’t you have it?”

“No Nessie, we both want you to have it. Your eyes really are the perfect color for emeralds.”

Jasper’s gift took her breath away. It was an authentic civil war fife. His card stated simply, “This belonged to a friend of mine, I look forward to hearing you play it.”

“Aunt Alice? Are you sure?” These gifts are so extravagant.

“Of course sweetheart!”

Bella handed her an old “Get out of Jail Free” card from a Monopoly game. Okay, this is really strange. “Um, thanks mom?”

Everyone laughed, apparently in on the joke.

“We are officially un-grounding you as of this minute.” YES! That is freaking awesome! “However, we expect you to control your temper and be kind to Jake on Kitchen Night.”

“Just on Kitchen Night?” Nessie smiled to be sure her mom knew she was joking.

Jake’s gift was a handmade card with a beautiful ink sketch of an eagle soaring above the Ocean cliffs near La Push. As she studied his art she could almost smell the ocean. When she looked really close, she saw a large reclining wolf hidden in the trees with a woman leaning against him. He somehow managed to hide them within the sketch so they only appeared if you let your eyes go slightly out of focus. Her mouth fell open in surprise, and she laughed out loud.

“Oh, let me see what’s so funny, Nessie.” Alice chirped with glee, as she snatched the card out of her hand. Before Nessie could protest, she was handing it back. “I didn’t see anything funny, but it is a very nice rendition of Jacob’s childhood home. I like the way the eagle’s perspective makes you feel that you are flying with him, and viewing the cliffs from the sky.”

Nessie was surprised that Alice didn’t mention the wolf couple. Was it possible she missed it? Not likely. Maybe she was just protecting her privacy. Again, not likely, Alice doesn’t believe in privacy. Or maybe… those perfect vampire eyes couldn’t go out of focus enough to see the secret hidden in the forest.

Nessie finally got to open the card. She recognized Jake’s messy scrawl. How can he be such an accomplished artist with pen and ink and have such horrible handwriting? “Miss you already and I haven’t even left yet. Ha! I’ll give you your gift when I get back. Hope you’re having a great time. Jake”

Nothing too personal about that, Nessie passed the card around and not one of them said a word about the wolf and his companion. She planned to have the card mounted, framed and hanging on her wall before bed tonight.

“This is from both of us.” Esme handed her a heavy green box. Inside, wrapped carefully in archival paper, was an ancient Bible. The well-preserved leather cover appeared incredibly fragile. She set it down on the table with reverence knowing exactly what it was, knowing that her name and date of birth was inscribed in that ancient tome under her parents names. The entire Cullen family tree was in that book.

“Esme, this is too much. You can’t give me Carlisle’s family Bible!”

“Yes we can Renesmee and we insist you take it. Your studies of historical preservation qualify you to care for it properly. Besides, who better to give it to than the only member of our family that can pass it on to her children.”

That’s when she realized this was more than just a rite of passage celebration. Each gift was a family heirloom; a priceless treasure that should have been handed down from father to son, and mother to daughter. There would be no sons or daughters for Rose and Emmett, Alice and Jasper, or Esme and Carlisle. All of their human hopes and dreams had died years ago, when they themselves became immortal. Renesmee’s coming of age was a new beginning for all of them. Her children would be their children. For the first time in her life, Renesmee was thankful that she was indeed half human.

TO BE CONTINUED!!!