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by jnc Author IconMail Icon
Rated: · Short Story · Mystery · #1664170
"who did it" mystery with an interesting twist...


It’s always a long day for her, but today she got home early not knowing what she was about to encounter in her own home. Exhaustion was taking over her as she parked her car out front, not even realizing the unknown car she pulled up next to. Barely being able to keep her eyes open, she staggered to the front door, put the key in the lock, but then noticed that the door was already open. Shocked out of her own exhaustion, she slowly and quietly pushed open the door, hesitating a little, and then she saw them, her fiancĂ© of nine months, who was to become her husband in a week, and his sister. Now, this situation would be perfectly fine, because she’s his sister, except the fact that they were romantically kissing on the couch, and too in to it to even notice her. Then the nausea completely took over her at this sight. Her heart was pounding so hard it felt like it had turned to stone inside her. Her mind raced with painful thoughts and images as her entire world caved in on her in a matter of seconds. Once they finally noticed her at the door and she became sane enough to look them in the eyes, she couldn’t believe the looks on their faces. She expected to see shocked expressions with fear in their eyes, except she got the complete opposite, which made her stomach knot up and her tears begin to flow again. Their faces showed expressions of hatred and love for each other, and she could see in their eyes an overwhelming relief. She could only imagine what her own face revealed. What insane nightmare was this and why couldn’t she wake up? After unwillingly analyzing their faces is when she was lying on the floor in the middle of the room sobbing like a newborn fresh out the womb. Not being able to control her body and emotions, she crawled into a corner of the room. She felt excruciating pain everywhere inside her. She was disgusted to the fullest extent. Her only thought that was comprehendible enough for her to place into words at the moment was her predictable question of “why?” Their smiles quickly erased from their faces as they stood and crossed the room to her. Without being able to think fast enough to react to their movement, she blacked out in the blink of an eye.





Ch. 1

Several knocks came to the door that read Detective J. Areylynn on the front. J awoke to the annoying persistence of the knock that continuously came to the door of her office. She yelled an exhausted, “Come in!” Yet when the door opened, she regretted saying the words. Through the door came the newly hired, suck-up bus boy that did whatever he was told, but he never listened to J. She couldn’t stand the boy and he’s only been working with her for two weeks, but she should have known it was him at the door because of his persistence, which was really annoying. Had she known before telling him to come in, she would have ignored him longer. He never had any good news, only work, which is usually bad news.

“I have a new game for you to play,” he said with a sarcastic smirk on his face. Man, I hated him. “20 year old bride-to-be, Maylee, mysteriously dies in her house. FiancĂ©, Scott, found her when he got home from work. No eye witness, no one heard anything, nada,” he paused and looked at me like I should be scared of him. I definitely wasn’t. “Have fun!” Of course he had to finish it off with an annoying, unnecessary comment. I despise him.

“Thanks a lot…uhh…,” I definitely forgot his name. This wasn’t the first time, but I wondered if I did it on purpose or by accident.

“Everett Harman. Remember it; it will be useful in your near future.” He unsuccessfully tried to wink at me. I definitely forgot his name on purpose.

“Yeah, thanks. Bye!” I slammed the door in his face. That made my day. I picked up the information packet he called a “game.” He’s such a jerk, calling someone’s unresolved death a “game.” Idiot!

I looked at the pictures of the victim. She looked horrible. I mean, I’ve seen some pretty bad stuff and some stuff that should have never happened, but there was always one really bad death that happened every once in a while, and this was one of them. I didn’t want to make any assumptions to the murder until I actually was able to fully examine the crime scene, but it clearly looked like whoever destroyed this woman was in a complete rage. I don’t know what she did or what someone else did or what something did to whoever, but it was definitely not natural for a human to do something this awful to another human being.

There were four different pictures of her in the information packet. The first two were pictures of most of her body. One was from the neck up, and the other from the neck down. The other two were pictures of two other parts of her body which I couldn’t quite figure out what it was by the pictures. If I could guess without being put in a mental institute, I would say that giant, rabid ants with huge, sharp claws and teeth killed her. From what I saw in front of me it made sense. Her body was completely unrecognizable and horrifyingly demolished. She had bruises everywhere and what looked like teeth marks on her shoulders. What was really strange was the deep, dime sized holes and the lumpy marks on what I think were her legs. Definitely disgusting, but sadly, I’ve seen worse. How could that dork call my job a “game?”



Ch. 2

Not paying any attention to the dummies I worked with, I burst out of my office and dialed my best friend/partner’s number. I definitely needed her on this one. She answered the first ring, “Hey J, where are we meeting?”

Man, she was the best, “Hey Mia. Meet me at 412 Green St. in 20 minutes and bring some old clothes; it’s going to be nasty.”

“Uh oh, alright J, I’ll be there in 19.” She hung up the phone quick, not that it bothered me, I was used to it, and honestly, it saved time.

I was just about to go out the door when the other idiot walked up to me. You thought I hated stupid boy, this one was worse. He was like the annoying brother from the deep, dark, never-ending black hole in your worst nightmares. He wasn’t really that bad; it’s just the fact that he tried way too many times to purposefully steal and take credit for my cases. The thing I hated most about him was that for some annoying reason I remembered his name.

“Taiem,” What else was I supposed to say. “Don’t you go stealing my case again or I’ll knock the sweat out your pores!” Yeah, right.

“It’s the infamous J. Areylynn! How are you today, gorgeous?” When he was done being an idiot, he took a big obnoxious bite of a snickers bar, chewing absentmindedly, and flinging peanut pieces in my face. Hate. Abhor. I walked right past him and left the pitiful place I called my occupation. I heard the door open up behind me and instinctually quickened my pace toward my car. I really didn’t feel like dealing with him today. He kept calling my name, but finally went back inside when he saw me get in my poor excuse for a car and start the engine in a hurry.

I pulled up to the house and sure enough my greatest, best friend, Mia, was already there. Even though she knew we were here to solve a murder, she still had a reassuring smile on her face. I stepped out the car and handed her the folder that contained the poor bride-to-be’s information and pictures inside.

“Oh wow. This is a bad one,” she said looking at the photos, “What’s her name?” I can’t believe I seriously forgot.

“Umm, I forget, Mia. Check the last paper at the bottom.” Sure enough it was there in bold print. Anderson, Maylee. At least I hadn’t forgotten that paper as well.

“Alright, well, let us go and see the tragedy of Ms. Maylee Anderson.”

“Brace yourself,” I warned her. We walked up the front steps and, surprisingly, out came some random guy that was crying. He looked fake though, but I didn’t say anything. Mia instantly cared for the man. She’s always nice to random people like him. I just wanted to know who he was and how he could help me with my case. Mia was reassuring him that everything was going to be alright and that there was nothing to worry about. How was she saying these things to a random person? I decided it was time for me to interrupt the weird and definitely phony cry and ask this guy some questions.

“Hi Sir,” he looked at me like I just told him he was the most hideous thing on earth and he should never show his face again, not even by looking in the mirror. When he didn’t say anything and just sat there on the steps holding Mia’s hand like a deranged fool, I politely informed him, “I said hi to you, or did you not hear me?” Mia gave me evil eyes filled with warning, but I didn’t care. He was being rude.

“So since you’re not going to answer me, I’m just going to invite myself in to your safe and humble home.” He started crying again. Such a punk. When I went into the house, leaving Mia outside with her new found sickly child, all I felt was cold. It was weird, because it was so hot outside, but inside was like all the cold had come inside this house waiting for winter to come so it could disperse throughout the world.



Ch. 3

One thing got me off the upsetting feeling of the house; the stupid cops. Of course the cops had to come in here and tape everything up with that bright yellow, unnecessary DO NOT ENTER and WARNING stuff that just got annoying and tore down anyway. Once I made my way through the yellow psychotic maze in the hall, I saw the almost most disturbing sight in my life. Poor Maylee was literally spread across the entire floor. What was left of her scattered body parts were completely drenched in her blood. As I walked through the room over to the part of her body that had her head attached, I noticed that the carpet was unusually sticky when my pace suddenly slowed. I then realized that the carpet was supposed to be a light tan color, hence the tan carpet in the hall, except the carpet in the room with her body was a deep burgundy that spread into the whole carpet. It was disgusting.

“Oh my goodness, J, this is horrible.” Mia finally came in to see the tragedy. “Do you know what you’re stepping on?”

“Yeah, I just kind of figured that out. I was too shocked at the sight of Maylee’s body that I hadn’t even been my normal observant self.” Mia laughed at my sarcastic tone. She knew me better than anyone, and she knew I was not an observant person at all. How was I possibly able to become a detective? I’m just good.

“I suggest taking no more steps in to the ocean of blood.” She was wrong. I needed to go to see the body before my people came and took her away. It was impossible to mess up any evidence in here. The evidence was everywhere. If they couldn’t get a blood sample from her or the carpet where I stepped, they could take it from the rest of the carpet or the walls. Wouldn’t really make a difference, unless someone else’s blood was also mixed in with Maylee’s. Mia didn’t say anything when I ignored her suggestion. She just started taking her way too graphic pictures as usual. I slowly made my way to Maylee’s body. It was much worse in person, but I could definitely view her body better.

The holes that defaced Maylee’s body looked like whoever did this used a screw to put holes in her chest and out through her back. The marks on her shoulders that I thought were teeth marks looked more like punctures from a fork. My rabid ants theory was sadly getting harder to believe. What was also strange was the fact that, for some odd reason her face was completely untouched, except for some blood, of course.

My excited bunch of dorky co-workers came noisily into the house complaining about the cold, but once they saw the room, became completely quiet. After their initial shocked silence, they became annoying again. Speaking of annoying, Taiem was the first one to expectantly make an obnoxious and unnecessary comment.

“The dead bride-to-be is looking magnificent today! Red is really her color. Ms. Areylynn, are you the lucky ‘groom’?” He sucks. Everyone laughed for a second until they saw my face, except him of course.

“Why don’t you do everyone a favor, Taiem, and go bury yourself alive.”

“As long as you come with me, sweet princess, my wish is your command.” Uhg.

Mia quickly finished taking some good pictures when I gave her the ‘I’m going to strangle these people’ look and I bagged up some looking important small, loose articles that were soaked in blood off the floor. I found a piece of cloth, an anonymous red squishy thing and pepper spray. I’m guessing Maylee tried to fight back, or spray back. At least she went out with a bang, I guess. Anyway, Mia and I were on our way down the hall, when I looked into the kitchen to my left and saw a saw. It had blood on it, too. I walked over to get it, when I looked in the sink and saw a fork, with blood on it.



Ch. 4

Wow, I felt so accomplished. Obviously, whoever did this wasn’t trying to hide anything. If it was me, I wouldn’t leave the house looking like this. Maylee came up behind me and put what I had found into bags. I’m guessing that if the killer left the house like this, we could find some fingerprints on the saw and the fork. After discovering so many things, I felt so confident in myself that I decided to search the rest of the house for other goodies.

The house was only one story so it was easy to search. There aren’t a lot of hiding places and Mr. Killer wasn’t trying to hide anything anyway. I’ll have to remember to thank the jerk when I catch him. It had to be a record for how fast everything was being found and figured out. What I didn’t understand was why my best friend, Mia, was so quiet and depressed looking.

“Are you okay, Mia? Do you want to leave now?” I thought she might be disgusted and upset about the whole situation, but she was usually perfectly fine with dead bodies and blood and guts and stuff like that.

“I’m fine, J. I’m just a little sick to my stomach. I’m fine though, really.” Then out of complete nowhere, she started crying. So I asked her.

“Did you know her?” She stopped and starred at me with utter shock.

“Did I know who?!” She just yelled at me. No she didn’t, “J!” Oh, yes she just did. She didn’t scare me, but she made me want punch her and bring her back to our universe.

“I’m talking about Maylee. Who else? What is wrong with you?” She took so long to say something, I ran out of things to think about except the fact that I wasn’t thinking about anything. I’m weird. “Mia, it’s okay if you don’t feel right being here. You can leave if you want; you did enough work for today. Take tomorrow off, too. You look horrible.” She became angry, so I called for one of the dorky co-workers in the other room. “Hey…”

“J shut up,” my mind’s playing tricks on me, “no, I’m sorry,” that’s more like it. Just when I thought she was becoming semi-sane she started crying again and had the nerve to pull a knife out on me. I reacted fast to her when she threw it at me, which was surprising for me, anyway. I wasn’t fast enough, unfortunately. The knife went in my knee and I dropped to the floor.



Ch. 5

She was still crying, which I think was a good sign, because it at least showed that she felt a little bad for just stabbing me in the knee. I was going to call for help, but of course everyone had already left. The only time that I actually needed them they weren’t there. Great. Then I heard someone come through the door. I was about to yell at the top of my lungs for help, when the fake crier guy came into the room. Not crying, of course. I knew he was a fake.

“I can’t let you find out, J.” Mia was not Mia anymore. I don’t know what happened to her, and I had no clue what she was talking about. I think I had an idea, but I didn’t want to think the worst.

“I really wish I knew what you were talking about Mia. What do you want from me?” I really need to learn to keep my mouth shut, especially when I’m in cripple mode.

“Yes J, exactly! I didn’t have what I wanted and I couldn’t stand it anymore!

“Mia, I don’t think you should be telling her this,” the random guy said, while he put his hand on my so called “best friend.”

“She’s my best friend, Scott; I can tell her whatever I want!” So, the freaky, random fake cry baby has a name! How did they know each other, though?

“Okay, Mia, what’s going on? You just stabbed me in leg and you’re yelling at random Scott, here, and I’m so confused!” I was so confused.

“J, Scott is my brother, but that’s not what I got to tell you.” More tears were starting to come out her eyes.

“Mia, you can’t trust her,” he was making me mad, and if I wasn’t injured right now, he would have gone out the window.

“Excuse me, but you don’t even know me, Mr. Scott, so how could you possibly know if she can trust me or not? We are best friends and you never told me you had a brother, Mia.” Man, I hate people.

“Because it’s that bad, J.” Right when she said that and I saw the regret and fright in her eyes, I knew exactly what she was talking about. I knew she was talking about Maylee’s death and my heart squeezed achingly, because I didn’t want to hear the truth.

“Please tell me it’s not true, Mia.” Tears were streaming down my face like I squeezed onion juice in my eyes. When she didn’t say anything and began to cry, I gave up hope that it was possibly Scott who killed Maylee and not my best friend.



Ch. 6

“Please forgive me, J,” she fell to the floor in front of me, because I was still on the floor, in pain, because of her. What do you say to your best friend who’s a killer? I can’t forgive a killer, but I can’t let down my best friend.

“I don’t know what to say, Mia. You’re a murderer.”

“I told you she wouldn’t understand, sweetie.” Stott felt he needed to add.

“J, she was stealing him away from me. I had to stop her; it was only a week away. What was I supposed to do? Let them get married?” Okay, what?

“Yes, Mia, that’s exactly what you should have done. He’s your brother; he’s not going to be around forever.” Now she was all close to her brother, but I didn’t even know the guy. Then, she looked at me like I was crazy, “What?”

“Scott and I are more than that. We’re in love.” What did I get myself in to?! I wanted to throw up my insides. Was she really telling me this? Scott was in the corner with his face in his hands.

“Oh God!” That’s about all my brain processed at the moment.

“J,” she gave me that sad, caring look in her eyes. For a second I saw my friend again. Then she said, “You have to help me, J. I need you to protect me and Scott until we move to Mexico.” What?!

“Mia, I can’t believe you’re asking me favors after everything that’s just happened,” shows how selfish she is, “I can’t protect a killer,” Quick movements behind me made me jump and turn to see what was happening. Perfect. There was a gun to my head, Scott was out of his pity corner and Mia turned evil again.

“J, if you don’t help us, then I can’t let you live.” Mia walked over to me to do I don’t know what, but I’m glad I didn’t find out, because the guy I hated the most just busted into the room. It was the first time I was happy to see him. Then Mia and Scott both screaming at the same time told Taiem to back off or I’m going to die. Of course he was going to be a jerk at the wrong moment and move toward me anyway. They warned him again and Scott pushed the gun harder to my head. Taiem finally stopped and looked at me with a surprisingly caring expression and his eyes were tearing up. He only said my name without moving and the gun went off. I fell to the ground; I couldn’t even feel my knee anymore. I didn’t even know how I was still feeling the bullet that went into my head. I should have been dead right away, but I wasn’t. I was lying on the floor waiting for enough blood to pour out of my head so the pain would go away. Taiem ran over to Scott, who was starring absentminded at me, and hit him, unconscious on the floor next to me. Then he went to Mia, who was almost out the door trying to escape, and swung at her to hit her like he hit Scott, but she moved with the blow, so it didn’t affect her as much. She was smart, but Taiem was fast and he got her by the neck and wrestled her to the ground until she went unconscious as well. He ran over to me crying my name and telling me not to go. He looked me in the eyes and I saw a whole new person there with me. He looked at me like I was a precious and priceless treasure, like I was special to him. Once he took me in his arms, he whispered in my ear, “I have always loved you, Jayana Areylynn.”

Right before I slipped away, I was able to somehow create a smile on my face, which only made him cry even harder. I wish I was able to move so I could hug him back, but I felt my life slipping away from me as my sight became darker and my breaths were short and weak. My head was throbbing with pain and then nothing.





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