humor

Here is the title of a file somebody had typed on this computer here at Touro (“where we learn to spell our own names; well, at least our last names”) -
why did i decided to go to college
You can’t make such stuff up, so stop shaking your head and saying “Yeah, right. The guy’s just trying to be funny.” That is an unfair accusation, because I’m not just telling you this to be funny: I’m also telling you this because (I am a schoolteacher who wants to be appreciated in the form of tips and) this proves the importance of schoolteachers: if people would just learn to write English in elementary school, then when they went to Israel for a year to learn or whatever, they could easily pick up the Hebrew/Arabic/French/Japanese language (depending on which country they end up in during their “Israel” Experience), and by the time they return from Israel and go to college, they would have already picked up enough foreign languages to erase any recollection of the English they learned in yeshiva, prompting them to write essays entitled -
why did i decided to go to college
Whether or not people remember all the English they learned in yeshiva, it is definitely a very important part of a person’s education, since English is a well-known language all over the world. This means that English is vitally important for your upcoming career, since no matter what country you end up importing carpets from, there will be English speakers there. Every serious foreign businessman speaks English. The only other language that could help in your import/export career is Chinese, because China is where all the serious child labor goes down, which results in the outcome that, when Chinese goods reach developed countries such as Boro Park, anybody can walk into these 99 Cents And Up stores and with only a buck, they can buy a set of markers that will last and last, for years on end, until you actually try to write with them. Of course, nobody in his right mind will actually try to learn Chinese, so the only way you can communicate with these Chinese Child Slave-drivers is in English. Yes, they speak English. However, you don’t need to go into Import/Export business; if you don’t know English, just go to Touro and write essays entitled -
why did i decided to go to college
- and eventually, your college professor will teach you some English, because that is what Touro is here for: to teach you what you should have learned in elementary school.
Aren’t you curious to know exactly what was written under the aforementioned title? It sounds like quite an amusing essay, judging by the title. I assume that you are curious about it; therefore, as a favor to you, I am going to share with you that I am also curious about it. Hey, no sweat.
But seriously, we do want to know the answer as to why he did decided to go to college. Well, we cannot say anything with certainty other than that he really needs to learn English, which brings me back to my point: people should learn English in elementary school. The logical conclusion of this is that English teachers are very important, so you should tip them more. This is the way to encourage us teachers to do a better job teaching your children English so that your children don’t end up writing essays entitled –
why did i decided to go to college
As a teacher, I would suggest another way of getting your children to learn English: get them a lot of good books to read. Reading is the best way to learn English