Love You

“Love You”

Who knew it was her last birthday?  My friend and I share the same birth month, October.  Things were crazy this year, a lot of changes, a lot of letting go.  But she wasn't anyone or anything I thought I would have to let go of so soon.  She was a workaholic.  I thought she would out live me even though she was 10 years older.

She had knee surgery a couple of weeks before her birthday and was a little down, not being able to work and all.  Her daughter decided to plan a big party for her.  And all her friends and family showed up and she spent most of the time in the wheel chair but she got up and did a little dancing before retiring early from her party.

6 weeks was the expected heal time for her knee, but it was quite swollen and she had a lot of pain. The doctors told her she needed to try harder.  I wished her daughter had not returned to her family two states over and had stayed and looked after her mom.  When Sherry, her daughter was here Barbara got the best of care.  I had told Barb you need to let those doctors know you are not a whiner.  If you say it hurts , it hurts and something is wrong. 

It's December and she is healing slowly, but she is getting around on her walker.  We would talk frequently and I went over to help around the apartment from time to time.  Her speech was a little slurred sometimes and I thought maybe its the pain pills they were giving her.

December 20, a Sunday, we talked.  Again I noticed her speech was slurred but I didn't do anything.  I thought maybe the pain pills.  Early Monday morning Sherry called me.  She told me if I wanted to see her Mom I needed to get right over to the hospital.  She was taking a plane and would be there by 3 pm and they would be disconnecting life support.

The last time someone spoke to Barbara was 6:30 pm that Sunday night.  She had gone back to her place and must have collapsed into the chair.  She was found a couple of hours later.  The paramedics came and she was rushed to the hospital.  The doctors said a blood vessel ruptured and then she had a hyper-tensive episode which caused it to tear even more and she bled into the left side of her brain.  At 4 pm on Monday life support was turned off, at 4:30 she passed.

We always ended our conversations and visits with, “Love You”.  I miss her.  I wish I knew the last few weeks with her were going to be the last few weeks.  I wish I had skipped work and gone to her birthday party...