A Love that could not be

A Love That Could Not Be


Robert hated what he knew he must do.  He hated it for Lisa.  And he hated it for himself.

The love that had grown between Robert and Lisa was unintended.  He did not set out to love her, but he did love her nonetheless.  And Lisa returned that love in kind.  It happened slowly--a kind word, a smile, sharing their latest funny mishaps in the break-room at the mega-mall where they both worked, the touch, the kiss, their first embrace.  Just as such bonds had been formed many times before, they came to find fulfillment in each other’s arms.  He knew it was illogical, but in such affairs he also knew that logic had little to do with it.

And anger raged throughout the world for such like pairings.  From the pulpits and statehouses, from courthouses and street corners, the cries rang out.  Unnatural, they proclaimed.  A travesty in the face of that which is good and wholesome, they protested.  An abomination, they shouted.

His few remaining friends had pleaded with him to break off his relationship with Lisa.  They begged him, not just for his future, but for Lisa’s also.  As yet there was no law forbidding the bond they shared, only the weight of public opinion was against them.  It could only end in resentment and bitterness, they told him.

Robert knew they were right.  As much as he wanted the world to accept their love, he knew it would never happen; the bigotry and hatred would never allow it.  Walking hand in hand, looking into the shop windows or sitting in the park simply enjoying each other’s company, he saw the vile expressions of the humans and heard their venomous shouts.  “Dirty machine lover.”  The androids, though more controlled, were no less contemptuous of such intimate relationships between human and android.  She never spoke of it, but Robert knew Lisa was not insensitive to the taunts and jeers and even hatred that spewed from these so-called enlightened beings.

In the end, he knew he could not do this to Lisa.  For both their sakes he had to let her go.

*

Lisa sensed what was coming just by Robert’s expression.  She had suspected for several days that it would happen.  Knowing did nothing to lessen the impact of his words.

The tears began to well as she could only reply, “But I love you.  It’s real.  Nothing could make me believe otherwise.  It’s not something I can simply turn off.  I need you.  I know you need me, too.  We can go away…someplace where it doesn’t matter what we are.”

Trying to hold back his own feelings, Robert said, “There is no place.  The attitude is the same regardless of where we might go.”  Gently, he said, “Lisa, androids cannot truly love.  They can only mimic love.  They can learn and revise their programming, even to the point that they believe it to be true, but it’s not, it’s not…real.  It’s my fault.  I should not have allowed you to learn to love me.”

He knew the tears streaming down her cheeks were more than just a programmed response to the words he had spoken.  They were real and born in the depths of her soul.  As much as he had prepared, in this moment he found nothing he could say or do to console her.

Robert, his face lined with sadness, looked into her eyes with an intensity he had never before displayed.  “Lisa, please believe me.  If there was any way…” he trailed off, knowing the hollowness of his words.  “Someday you will find someone…someone of your own kind.  And maybe on that day you will forgive me.  Perhaps on that day you will be able to remember with fondness the love we shared…I shall not.”  He lightly touched her hair and said, “I’m sorry,” then turned, no longer able to bear the pain in those eyes.

As Robert walked away he triggered a small, low-level correction application…resetting his emotion chip.  Only seconds later his self-diagnostic processor told him he was now functioning within accepted parameters.

Lisa wept.