LAWN BOY

Lawn Boy


I was sweating like a pig and probably smelled like one too, as I sat down on the patio. Closing my eyes I chugged the last of my cold brew. I had just finished mowing the lawn; mind you it wasn't my lawn. No it was the lawn of my ex-wife, Cynthia. She had just bought herself a home on a quiet cul de sac.

It wasn't a big house, three bedrooms, two and half bathrooms, split level ranch. She lived by herself anyway; I guess the extra rooms were for when our kids visited. She wanted to start fresh when we split so she told me to keep the house in town for me and the kids.

Our son didn't visit either of us often and our daughter lived with me when she wasn't at school. She didn't like her mom's new boyfriend Tony, some Italian lawyer she met at the courthouse. We married right out of high school and started a family; it lasted twenty two years before we called it quits two years ago. I hadn't seen much of Cynt my job keeping me busy and she was working for a legal referral agency downtown now.

That's how she got the house; her boss helped her locate and close on a repo fixer upper. She was getting the place together nicely. To save money she asked me to stop by Saturday to help get the yard together. I came over did the mowing, pruned some trees and a little gardening.

After I finished my beer I looked up I saw the chubby blonde next door neighbor; who appeared to be only wearing a thin robe of satin or silk; heading back behind the privacy fence that blocked her Jacuzzi from view.

She had been popping in and out her house all morning fetching beers for her loud mouth husband.

"Where the hell is your big ass at wit my beer," He hollered.

She stopped and looked me over suspiciously, again. Probably wondering who the black man working in her neighbor's yard was. Well I wasn't going to tell her, so I waved at her and she just spun around hurriedly back to her man.

I laughed to myself, “White folks."

Cynt was always kind of particular about where she would live, it had to be in a

"Mixed neighborhood, because folks know how to act," She was fond of saying.

So she had her little dream house in the right kind of hood, even if it was a less then exclusive area, out in the 'burbs.

I felt the call of nature so I got up and headed to the bathroom. I noticed a car in the driveway behind my pickup. It belonged to Cynt's friend Gayle.

Those two had been hanging out quite a bit since our break up. Gayle was a five foot nothing, light skinned sister, with green eyes, and a bubble butt. I always thought she was a freak; she loved to get hoochied up when we went out with her and John her husband.

Gayle would flirt and dance close rubbing that donkey all up on other men at the club, then her and John would get into it on the drive home about her antics. Cynt would tell me Gayle's just a tease. Whatever, her and John were divorced before us so I still think the girl is a freak.

Anyway, after relieving myself I headed back out to put the mower away. I could hear the two of them up in Cynt's bedroom laughing and talking like a couple of school girls. Curiosity got the best of me so I eased up the stairs and peeked in on them.

I saw Cynt standing in front of a full length mirror with only a tiny white bikini covering her chocolate body, her back was towards me and I got a good look at her gorgeous bottom. I crept a little further down the hall and could see Gayle lying across the bed, in a pair of denim cut offs, oh boy were they cut off, gold tube top, a pair of wedge heeled sandals with laces wrapping her legs almost to the knee, I also noticed her new coif, ultra short natural....bleached of course .

She was looking at Gayle. They hadn't heard me come upstairs so I just hung back to eaves drop on them.

"How's this one look?" asked Cynt over her shoulder

"I liked the yellow thong better." countered Gayle.

She would I thought to myself.

"I don't know this one just feels better to me, besides I may not need it anyway, there's a nude beach where we're going," Cynt said.

Say what! I thought.

"Shit Girl you know you ain't even gonna go naked in front all them folks." Gayle laughed.

"Well last time we went I didn't feel comfortable, but I've been working hard in the gym and I'm sure my ass is tight enough." Cynt countered.

The thought of Cynt walking around naked in public disturbed me, but hey she wasn't my wife anymore. I always felt she was a bit of an exhibitionist, besides the bikini she wore left little to the imagination anyway.

"I knew that as soon as you started messing' with that white boy you were gonna turn into the freak a'da week." Gayle giggled.

"Please girlfriend," said Cynt sucking her teeth and giving Gayle the hand. "Besides Tony's not white he's Italian."

"White...Italian, same dif. He ain't no brotha." Gayle stated.

I concurred with that.

"Well I like him just fine, and besides he treats me nicer then the few trifling Negroes who tried to get in these draws. But girl he has brought out a lil freak in me I guess," Cynt beamed as she licked her finger and touched to her butt while making a sizzling sound.

They both exploded into giddy laughter. I just shook my head slowly back and forth. Then Cynt turned around and walked to the bed pulling the on her top apart as she moved. She threw the top on the bed and undid the bottom's strings and pulled it through her crotch and tossed it on the bed to join its mate.

She stood naked looking over the items on the bed trying to choose one. I got to look at what I had given up for the first time in a good while. She looked younger then forty three, her breasts were small but perky and firm, her waist was narrow. She had just the slightest hint of a six pack, and the thighs were lean like a dancer's, and her mons covered with a narrow short cropped landing strip. mmm mmm good, and to think...it used to be mine, damn.

"Damn I hate you, how do you stay in shape like that?" Gayle asked.

"Come to the gym with me and I'll show you," Cynt said.

"Me at the gym, not...hey what's he like anyway?" Gayle asked, switching subjects.

"Who, Tony? He's nice; he treats me right pampering me with little gifts and this trip stuff like..." Cynt replied.

"No girl I mean what's he like, you know his umm, thing, his dick, Do those white boys really have little ones." Gayle asked suddenly sounding serious.

Cynt laughed picking up a blue bathing suit and inspecting it before responding.

"Damn is that all you ever think about Gayle? He's big enough, for me I mean. And yes he can lick the kitty like a pro. Makes me wanna holla." Cynt informed her friend.

Okay that was a little TMI for me, but the giggle twins exploded into laugher. Gayle reached up and high five Cynt.

"Mmm I know that's right girl, nothing wrong with a man who knows how to work downtown," Gayle said.

"No there isn't, not that Larry couldn't eat it, he just didn't stay down there long enough, all in a hurry to get his dick wet," Cynt said.

I was slightly crestfallen at her review of my skills.

"Sounds like John always in a rush unless it's me giving up the head," Said Gayle, as she bobbed her head up and down chuckling while she simulated what she was talking about by stroking her hand back and forth while poking out her cheek with her tongue.

"Girl you something else, so was John handling his business? Not to pry into your business but he was a busy boy." Cynt asked.

"That's cold girl," Said Gayle she paused briefly before continuing. "He was alright, but he was so needy. Always wanting me to tell him about how big his dick was. I mean, really if I told him the truth, I was afraid it would have hurt his feelings...well until I caught his cheating ass. Then I laid it on him. When I told him he didn't really have enough dick for one pussy...Girl, he was crushed. So was Larry lacking like that like that too?"

"Hell no...He didn't need me to tell him either, he knew he was Mandingo. Damn, he could split it in half if I let him get all buck wild," Cynt said, while tying on the blue bottoms.

My ego was inflating to dangerous proportions.

"Uhuh, I always thought he was packing, he had a big ole bulge," replied Gayle, before her brain had engaged.

"Excuse me?" Cynt icily lobbed back, a new tone in her voice. "You were checking out Larry?"

Gayle knew she had just stepped into the shit from the look on her face; that of a kid with their hand in the cookie jar. As she silently worked her jaw searching for the right response, someone came to the front door and interrupted their exchange. Gayle was saved by the bell so to say.

Well actually the person at the door didn't use the bell; they were banging on the storm door like a cop. A loud continuous Wham Wham Wham.

I had quickly ducked into an open door to avoid being discovered. As luck would have it I had a clear view down to the door. I saw a skinny women in her mid to late forties olive complexion reflecting a Mediterranean heritage, her hair was auburn, styled right out of the 80's mousse and puffed out big, I doubt it was her natural color.

Her heavy makeup only accentuated what she wore, white mini dress made from what resembled a tall man's tank tee shirt, it barely covered her slightly droopy grapefruit size breast which swayed freely as she moved her arm, a gold colored chain belted her waist, along with multiple bracelets, neck chains and rings she wore, she was shod in clear plastic platform slides. She was a euro-trash version of the beloved hoochie momma.

"Coming," Yelled Cynt as she put on a knee length kimono style robe. She headed for the door her shoulder length ponytail bouncing between her shoulder blades as she skipped down the stairs.

Gayle being the nosey person that she is followed her but remained on the stairs as Cynt answered the door. As soon as the women saw Cynt she flipped out and started yelling n a shrill voice.
"You better stay away from my husband Tony!" The crazed woman yelled.


Oh shit! Cynt's boyfriend was married. I'll give Cynt her due she remained far calmer then I would have thought given the circumstances.

"Excuse me but I think you have the wrong house." Cynt replied.

No I don't, I can see his car you fucking cunt! I'm his wife Mary, and I'll claw your god damn eyes out if you come near my Tony again!" screamed Mary.

"Damn that white muthafuka lied to you girl!" Added Gayle; once again opening her mouth before putting her brain in gear.

"Shut up Gayle," Cynt spit under her breath. "I'll deal with him later on my own."

Meanwhile the crazed women at the door continued her verbal tirade and kicked it up a notch by yanking on the storm door handle like she was trying to get in. That was a bad idea, thinking back I can still remember in our school days some girls catching fierce beat downs for crossing Cynt. Hell Cynt was always a bit of a tomboy when she was younger, fighting came with the territory.

"Look bitch if you don't get off my porch now I'm calling the cops," I heard Cynt's voice crack, and she used the B word, which meant she was on the verge of blowing a gasket.

"Call'em ya fuckin nigger!" Mary screamed.

Just then she jerk hard on the door and it popped open, before you could say "Hey cootie brown" she darted inside and closed the distance between herself and Cynt.

Even though she looked a bit taller as they stood face to face, her eyes suddenly got big as saucers and she took one step back. Mary was now the dog chasing cars, what does one do after you've caught it, she didn't know and that was a problem.

She tried to move backwards but her shoes hindered her movement. She took one baby step before Cynt had her by the Hair and swung her. Quickly Mary was off balance and found herself flung towards the wall. I watched her bounce off with a thud, losing a shoe as she fell back on the stairs.

"Oh my god, Cynt you killed her ass," Screamed Gayle as she nervously hopped up and down on the stairs looking as foolish as she sounded.

In a second Mary jumped up and ran, in the wrong direction; straight upstairs.

She struggled past the hopping ninny, her one shoe thumping on the carpet. Where Mary thought she was going I have no idea. Where ever she thought she was going was all wrong.

She limped past the room where I hid behind the door. Then I heard the door to Cynt's room slam shut. I didn't hear the click but she locked door. I waited for the sound of Cynt rushing up the stairs.

Instead heard Gayle running up and down the stairs no less then twice muttering to herself "Oh my god, oh my god."

I got to wondering where Cynt may have gone to, and then I thought she may have gone to look for me in the back yard so I checked using the bedroom window.

I caught a quick glimpse of Cynt crossing the patio heading back in, leaving a trail of debris to mark her course. All the debris she had dropped were small leafy branches, I knew that sign well from childhood. It was the tails from a freshly stripped switch of green wood.

Damn I know Cynt was angry but she couldn't do what I believe she was about to. I was about to step out to stop the madness when I heard Gayle make a plea to halt the proceedings.

Pleading Gayle implored "Girl are you crazy, what are you gonna do with..."

Her sentence was interrupted by a loud swoosh and the sharp hard pop of green wood on flesh, I knew the sound well from the many switching my folk gave me as a boy.

"Oww..., god dammit what the?" Gayle screamed in pain.

I heard the smack of the switch making contact again.

"Owwww," Gayle cried

Another smack and another cry from Gayle "Oowww!"

"Shut up silly cow, you ain't about shit! Where’d that heifer go?" Cynt asked.

"Your room." croaked a suddenly breathless Gayle.

"Get out my way." Cynt demanded.

I heard the quick foot fall of bare feet heading up the stairs, followed by a second person. Cynt banged on her room door furiously demanding entry.

"Go away...leave me alone, your crazy." Mary replied from behind the door.

Now I don't know where Mary thought Cynt was going to go, since it was Cynt's house and all. Also she should have been on the phone and leaning against that door to stop anyone from getting in.

Cynt's interior doors had the kind of locks that could be opened by inserting a small wire tool or slim screw driver in the little hole in the knob. I had seen the little metal wire key above the door jams earlier. From past experience of kids locking themselves in or us out, Cynt had the habit of keeping the simple picks handy. She could work a lock silently like an expert; ask my two kids.

"Nooo...Stay away from me." I knew the door had been opened, and then I heard the sounds of a struggle. Peeking out, I saw the hallway was clear, so I crept down to the open door. I craned my neck to peek in without revealing myself.

I saw Mary and Cynt struggling for control of the switch. It was about three and a half to four foot in length. Still covered with skin like bark, and the diameter was about as thick as a man's thumb at the big end, and it tapered to a thin crooked tip.

Gayle was still pleading with them to stop, but I couldn't see her. As they tug o' warred for the nasty looking tool, Cynt's hand shot out and jerked hard on the top of Mary's dress. The old girl fight tactic it worked perfectly. Mary's hands instinctively shot up to cover her now bared cones. I got a good look at her long nipples as she mashed her boobs with cupped hands to cover herself.

Once Cynt gained control of the switch she landed a flurry of blows on Mary. With the hot stings from the wicked wand slapping her flesh, Mary fell back against the bed then rolled to the floor where she tried to crawl under the bed. She wasn't small enough and got her head and one arm became stuck.

As she wrestled to free herself all her squirming and writhing revealed she hadn't bother to wear panties. Her salt and pepper bush confirmed my suspicions about her true hair color. I thought again about putting a stop all this craziness, but raging excitement wouldn't let me.

I watch fascinated as Cynt stood over Mary, looking sexy as hell with her robe opened and hanging off one shoulder, like some female warrior in a Kung Fu flick over a vanquished opponent. Cynt stroked the switch back and forth across Mary's upturned buttocks and thighs, all the while she lectured her like a scolding parent, ok the scolding parent of a dysfunctional family.

"Bitch...don't...you...ever...come...here...talking...to me...like...that." Cynt yelled.

Punctuating each syllable with a loud pop across Mary's ass, which was rapidly changing color to a deep blush.

"Please...Tony help me...Tooooone...she's crazy help me..." sobbed the almost incoherently Mary.

"He's not here the trifling bastard; I wish he was so I could beat his ass too!" Cynt retorted.

"You’re a fuckin liar. His car is in front your gawddamn house...owwwww...you cunt...owww ohgawd pleaseeeeee no more pleeease...oahhwwahh" howled Mary.

She was rewarded for her outburst with a flurry of lighting quick lashes. With each white hot bolt made her body jerk. I thought the cops would be showing up any second from the way she screamed in pain from the first volley.

Cynt paused to catch her breathe.

Mary froze when the blows halted except for her feet that were patting nervously against the floor as she anticipated the next smack. When it finally landed she gasped and sucked in breath while she slapped the carpet with her free hand.

Then Cynt stopping the whipping and things got still and the only sound was that of sobbing moans.

"Cynt you fucked up girl...owww...owwww stopit stopit." Gayle said in a small childish voice.

I heard the sound of a body thumping but couldn't see it. Cynt had moved out of site on the side of the room I couldn't observe.

"You're supposed to have my back dammit" Cynt yelled at Gayle.

I may not have been able to see I sure could hear Cynt cutting into her best friend. Gayle was bumping into the walls or furniture attempting to evade the searing cruelties of the swooshing switch. I crept up to the door and peeked in for a few seconds before yanking my head back attempting to avoid being seen.

I enjoyed a glimpse of Gayle rolling and crawling on the floor near a mirrored dresser as she tried to deflect the lashes with her arms and hands. Her tube top had rolled down near her waist from scrubbing against the carpet, I noticed the pink strawberry blotches from carpet burns all over her exposed body, and surprisingly her nipples were hard.

"Aiiee, Ohhheee....Uuuiii" Gayle yipped as the sizzling caresses found her bare cheeks.

Her Daisy Duke cut offs had wedged into her ass crack offering a perfect target. Cynt couldn't miss all that booty and Gayle's hips humped the floor in reflex to each lash. When the flogging stopped Gayle lay moaning on her stomach while sniffing back the tears. She looked pitiful on the floor sucking the thumb of one hand, while the other rubbed the fresh red stripes on her ass and thighs.

Cynt stood in between the woman with her chest heaving with each breath. She looked damn sexy, sort of wild and disheveled like she had just enjoyed a vigorous shagging.

"Now for your information... you crazy bitch the owner of that car out front is visiting my neighbor, like he always does. Now get out my house. All of you!" Cynt screamed

Cynt stung Mary once more before dropping the switch casually on the prone woman. Mary shrieked and jumped once more before falling back on the floor moaning. I heard Cynt's feet padding on the floor as she went into the Master bedroom's bath. The shower started running, and Cynt had some final words.

"And I mean you too, Larry you sneaky bastard..."

Oh shit! I was moving before she finished her sentence. How long had she known? Well I didn't wait to inquire, I just rushed back outside collected my tools so I could get going.

While pushing the lawnmower back into the garage, I saw Mary walking stiffly across the lawn with her shoes dangling in her left hand and the switch clutched in her right. She was heading towards the chubby lady's Front door.

I was tempted for a second to tell her they were in the back but her head snapped in that direction when loud mouth yelled for another beer.

I had to wait while Gayle gingerly climbed into her car and slowly backed out, before I could move my Ranger. While waiting I saw a short balding man came running from the behind the neighbors house. He was holding his clothes low against his jiggling potbelly to cover his nakedness.

As he fumbled around trying to unlock the red sports car's door I noticed several nasty looking welts across his back and buttocks. I then heard a woman's voice wailing loudly, I guess Blondie wasn't as agile as her lover and got caught in the Jacuzzi all nice and wet; her flesh had to be taking serious punishment. I sat in my truck listening to her screams, and then I became aware of the Asian guy who had been washing his car across the street. He was now in chubby's yard slowly creeping back towards the sound of the excitement. He was talking rapidly on his cell and I don't think it was 911, because his wife soon joined him. They jumped a bit when I finally started my truck.

As I turned the corner at the end of the street to head for home, I noticed the police directing traffic around an accident. A little red car had been t-boned by an SUV at the next intersection.

As I approached the intersection rubber necking like everyone else, I could see one driver was talking to an officer, gesturing and pointing toward the police cruiser, where another cop was helping someone wrapped in a blanket into the backseat.

As I rolled through the intersection the baby faced cop directing traffic stopped me while he eyeballed my pickup bed full of garden tools.

"Do you live around here sir?" He asked.

I wondered if my breath smelled like beer.

"No officer just out helping a friend" I replied.

"Hope you had good time. Have a good day."

"Thanks. I did." I responded.

Hell who knew that yard work could be so stimulating.

THE END © Bizsmith