I am dead

Living.
It's too hard.
I tried and I tried,
It comes back to bite me.
To tear a hole out of my chest,
And clench its jaws on my heart
Then sucking out all the sanity it held;
Like a vampire feasting for the first time.
Bitterness takes the place of my heart which is in the teeth of the new vendor.
Then I collapse.
My heart beats; I can't feel it.
The horror absorbs my aura, I forget how to breathe.
My life is sucked out like the air that once filled my lungs.
I see nothing; feel nothing; taste nothing; smell nothing; hear nothing;
I am dead, yet my heart beats (painfully); my lungs expand (explode); and my eyes blink (close them tight)
I am dead.