Love Is War

Dark room, no light
no more sunshine,
nothing left but
pain, heartbreak.
I'll never be enough.
So I cry so hard I throw up.
The pillow in my lap won't muffle
my screams enough to keep
them thinking I'm okay.
So I hide in this empty place
and leave it all behind,
just die without a trace.
There's nothing left to say
except "goodbye forever" and
"thanks for the scars and memories
of when you used to hold my hand."
So now to you I'm saying
"please just stay
and stop the pain.
Don't let me live like this,
don't leave me on this broken street
or say I won't be missed."
I don't wanna say goodbye,
not yet, my heart will not allow it,
please understand and try to see just how it
makes me feel to know that I'm unwanted.
Do you even care at all
that I'm so tired of seeing nothing but the angry, worried faces
of my friends and family and the people in these places.
Places meant to feel like home
but they're a little more like Hell.
They say it's just a phase,
that I'm okay, I might as well
be dying on the outside too,
and trying to forget you;
and everything we had
before this broke into a million shards
of glass and blood and razor blades
and bullets, guns, and hand grenades.
But you saved me from that load of pain
and let me live again.
You made my life like Heaven.
I thought everything was fine
and then I pushed you off the edge.
Now I'm back in my depression and
I'm fighting this obsession with you.
I keep calling and stalling for time
and when you say no I keep trying.
I can never let you go.
I need you in my life, so please please please
don't say no. I don't wanna go
back to nothing and no one and ripping
apart my mind and feeling so bad
because you made me go alone.
I gave you everything I ever had.
Tell me that means something,
that it wasn't just for fun.
This is real.
I know it and I'll love you 'til I'm gone.
And if love is war then I will fight
until the war is won.