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Rated: 13+ · Fiction · Fanfiction · #1582716
Tensions are high as Faith goes undercover, and Buffy gets some surprise reinforcement.
Chapter Eleven

Six o’clock came early at the mansion for the remaining Scoobies, but not soon enough for those who wanted to find their missing friend. All morning long, Dawn and Xander researched and recited spell after spell, hoping to find Willow’s whereabouts. Faith and Buffy meticulously combed the grounds and woods surrounding the house, searching for clues about the attackers and which direction they came or went. Just after noon, they all took a short break to temporarily repair the damage done by the explosion, then returned quickly to their earlier tasks.

“This is insane,” Faith finally said to Buffy as dusk began to fall. “We haven’t found anything. Where did these girls learn how to not leave tracks?”

“Wasn’t in my Slayer handbook,” Buffy said.

“Mine either.” They trudged silently through the woods back towards the house. “What do you think they want with Willow, anyway?”

Buffy sighed. “My guess is that Kennedy thinks we’re planning to use magic to remove their Slayer powers.”

“Whoa, can we do that?” Faith asked.

“Well, Willow could, sure,” Buffy replied. “We talked about it a few times, but we decided against it.”

“Why, B?” Faith asked. “I mean, what other options are there?”

“Faith, based on our ‘stellar’ experiences as Slayers, do you really think you and I should be the judge on who deserves Slayer powers and who doesn’t?”

Faith conceded. “Good point.”

“But if we were, Willow’s the magic mama who could make it happen. And Kennedy wants to make sure it doesn’t.”

The two Slayers approached the house and climbed the stairs to the library, where Xander and Dawn were reaching a slow end to their frustrated search.

“Any luck?” Buffy called as they entered the library.

“Nothing,” a defeated Xander answered. “A whole bunch of nothing.”

The four sat slumped and silent around the table. Buffy felt a shadow of hopelessness and discouragement creep up inside herself. She sat up in her chair.

“Well, we can’t give up,” she said firmly, mostly to herself. “What else can we do?”

“Buffy, we’ve been through this library like a gajillion times,” Dawn said. “There’s not a ‘what else.’”

Xander looked up. “You didn’t find anything outside? At all?”

Buffy shook her head apologetically.

“Geez, you’re freakin’ Slayers and you couldn’t find anything?” he exclaimed.

“Take it easy, yo,” Faith interrupted. “That’s not gonna help us find the witch.”

Xander snorted in disgust. “Try fighting on the side of good a little bit longer before you start handing out advice.”

Faith raised her hands in mock surrender and Buffy gave Xander a disapproving look.

“Don’t look at me like that, Buffy,” Xander replied. “My best friend has been kidnapped and we can’t seem to find any trace of her. I’m allowed a few insensitive comments. Besides,” he added, “you were the one that said we should keep tabs on her to see if she was one of the rogue Slayers.”

Faith turned to Buffy, whose face flushed with surprise, then mock disbelief, then guilt. “Well,” she explained slowly, “you don’t have the best track record when it comes to fighting the good fight,” she finished sheepishly.

Faith started to say something, then stopped abruptly. She looked away, deep in thought. Suddenly, she looked back at Buffy with a surprising smile on her face. “You know what, B? You’re absolutely right.”

Buffy was utterly confused. “Huh?”

“You’re right,” Faith repeated plainly. “You never really know when I’m gonna go bad again.”

Buffy was still lost. She glanced at Dawn and Xander, who were just as confused.

Faith continued. “Yep, you know if I were Kennedy, I would be recruiting me right about now.”

Xander and Buffy exchanged a look, wondering if Faith had suddenly lost her mind. She paid no mind and looked at Dawn intently. “I bet they’d just love to have me just walk right in and join up.”

Dawn stared back at her, then yelped in realization. “Oh! Faith can get Willow back!”

Faith smiled and winked at her. “Always knew you were the smarter sister.”

“Wait a minute, wait a minute!” Xander interrupted. “What?!”

“Faith can get Willow back!” Dawn repeated. “Pretending to be bad again!”

Buffy stared in shock at Faith, but Faith just chuckled. “Don’t look so ‘I-can’t-believe-I-didn’t-think-of-it-first,” she said, nudging Buffy playfully in the arm.

“Faith,” Buffy began, “I can’t let you do this–it’s too dangerous.”

“Whatever,” Faith dismissed her casually. “Look, I’m not one of your cartoon pals. Hot chick with super-powers, remember? Besides,” she leaned closer to Buffy, “you know it’s the only way to get Willow back.”

“Excuse me!” Xander interrupted. “Could someone please tell me what the hell you’re talking about?!”

“Xander, pay attention already!” Dawn scolded him. “Faith can get Willow back by pretending to go bad again and join up with the rogue Slayers,” Dawn explained.

“Hey pip-squeak,” Faith said, “do you have to keep saying ‘go bad again’?”

“If the shoe fits...” Dawn replied.

“Alright,” Buffy warningly said to Dawn. She turned back to Faith. “Are you sure about this?”

Faith stood and began pacing slowly. “Look, I know I’m not the golden girl... never gonna be. I’ve messed up a lot. But I’ve learned a lot... and this— I can help. I can do this.”

The two Slayers looked at each other and Buffy finally spoke. “Okay, let’s make a plan.”



Later that night, while Xander and Dawn tried to get some much-needed sleep, a restless Buffy found Faith smoking on the back patio.

“Nervous?” Buffy asked as she stood beside Faith.

“Nah, I just smoke because it makes my breath smell so good.”

“Smart-ass,” Buffy teased.

“Tight-ass,” Faith replied in kind.

Both smiled as they looked silently out into the night. After a while, Buffy broke the silence. “This is a really big thing you’re doing. For Willow. Wood would be proud.”

Faith drew another puff from her cigarette and looked down nervously. “Thanks.”

“I wish there was some way I could help you,” Buffy said.

Faith smiled cynically. “If those girls even smelled your shampoo on me it would be game over, no question. Besides, with Giles being gone and you having to run this place, and keeping Xander from having a stroke, and trying to find Willow and trying to find a solution to these rogue Slayers – I’d say you’ve got your hands full.”

“Yeah,” Buffy agreed. “I wish I had another pair of hands. After Giles and Willow, you’re the next strongest person here. And now you’ll be gone too.”

“Geez!” Faith exclaimed. “Here I am trying to do the right thing and you’re still giving me a guilt trip!”

“Oh I didn’t mean–“ Buffy tried hastily to apologize until she saw that Faith was joking. She smiled sheepishly. “Guess I’ve been a little off lately, huh?”

Faith gave her a look that said ‘duh’ then flicked her cigarette into the dark. “Guess I’d better hit the sack. Got to be ready for my award-winning performance tomorrow.”

“Leaving early?”

“Figured I’d start making my presence known early in the day so hopefully they’ll come find me before dark tomorrow.”

“And if they don’t?” Buffy asked.

“I’ll go looking for them. Boss ‘em, toss ‘em... whatever it takes to find Willow and get her back here.”

“Be careful, Faith,” Buffy cautioned. “We want you to come back too.”

Faith gave Buffy a cautious but warm smile before walking back towards the house.





Chapter Twelve

Not having slept at all, Buffy watched from her bedroom window as Faith set off early the next morning. As Faith strode confidently down the drive, Buffy felt more of her own confidence slip away. Giles was gone... Willow was gone... Faith was gone. She was left alone to make decisions against the backdrop of her friends’ and her own doubts. Regardless of what information Giles brought back, regardless of whether Willow and Faith returned, the outcome of this conflict ultimately depended on Buffy, and she felt the pressure as if a physical weight had been leveled onto her slender shoulders. Once again, she went back to the consequences of the rogue Slayers’ actions. Fighting and eventually killing them was not an option to Buffy. But what other alternatives did she have? How could she stop these girls from their reign of violence and murder without resorting to murder herself?

Buffy no longer had the confidence she felt when she fought the Master or Mayor Wilkins or even Adam. She felt like the ragged and exhausted woman who was kicked out of her own home after Caleb nearly killed her and her friends at the vineyard one year ago. Then, too, she had felt alone and helpless and unsure about what way to go. But then, Spike had barged in and forced Buffy to hear him proclaim the truth: that he loved her because she kept trying, despite the odds, and that for generations he had never been so sure of anything but her. He knew she would make the right decisions, no matter what the odds were against her.

Standing at her window and staring into the early morning fog, Buffy desperately wished that Spike could be there right then – to encourage her and comfort her and give her his unique brand of truth. If only I knew if I have what it takes to solve all this. She exhaled slowly, and with that breath, she let a single, lonely tear roll down her cheek. Five days passed, each more slowly and painfully than the last, without any word from Faith or Willow or Giles. The first day, Buffy, Xander, and Dawn told themselves that they would receive word from either the Watcher or Slayer any moment, but word never came. Giles was unreachable in whatever part of the world he had traveled to, and attempting to contact Faith or Willow could potentially prove fatal– if, in fact, they were still alive.

The third day passed silently as the remaining Scoobies were too anxious to make-up excuses that would make themselves feel better. On the fourth day, Buffy and Xander had another yelling fight about what they should do next, although it was mostly caused by stress and fatigue. So in the evening of the fifth day, Buffy stood in her bedroom– angry, tired, anxious, and desperate for answers. But the only problem she found that she could solve at present was her exhausted physical and emotional state, but sleep had eluded her for so long, she had given up trying. Instead, she decided to meditate.

As Buffy began her meditation, she began to think about Willow and Faith’s whereabouts. I know they’re still alive, Buffy thought firmly to herself. I would feel it if something happened to either one of them – I’m connected to both of them. Suddenly, Buffy had a thought. If we’re all connected... then I should be able to feel them... reach them somehow. She folded her legs and sat on the floor, balanced and still, closed her eyes, and put all her concentration into finding Willow. Her mind began to zoom through haze and fog, searching for Willow. After a long while, Buffy felt a familiar presence.

<Willow!> she called out. No response. <Willow! Can you hear me?!> Buffy thought again. Nothing. I know it’s her–I can feel it, she thought to herself. At least she’s not dead, or else I wouldn’t have found her at all. Maybe she’s unconscious or there’s a magic barrier.

Buffy decided to change tactics. She began to concentrate on Faith. I hope Faith is close... I hope she made it to Willow. Buffy’s mind once again began flying through thick clouds of fog and smoke, searching for Faith. Suddenly, the flying stopped short, and though her eyes were still closed, Buffy saw Faith’s face.

<Faith!> Buffy exclaimed. <Where are you? Are you okay? Where’s Willow?>

<Chill, B,> Faith said faintly. <I don’t have a lot of time, so just listen for once.> Buffy waited. <Look,> Faith began. <Willow’s on her way. I don’t know where exactly and I don’t know if I’ll make it back or not, but be on the lookout for her. I think I bought her enough time but you need to find her and soon. She’s pretty wiped.>

Buffy’s heart beat faster. <Why? What happened?>

<Cliff Notes version? I found Kennedy and the others pretty easy. Most of them bought my story about losing Wood and being pissed at you, so they let me in. I knew Kennedy wasn’t buying it though, so she made me prove myself. Told me to deep-six the witch. I was trying to make a quick exit with Willow when Kennedy figured us out. She came with like half the girls after us. Kennedy had done some kind of magic draining thing on Willow, so it was up to me to get us out of there. I told Willow to go ahead, that I’d buy us some time. I expected to be right behind her, but when Kennedy showed up, I knew she wanted a showdown.>

Then, Buffy felt a warm sensation surge through her body as, in her mind, Faith’s image placed her hands on Buffy’ head. Buffy’s point of view shifted from watching Faith talk to reliving the story as if she were in Faith’s body. Buffy watched as Kennedy approached, welcoming a chance to prove her superiority. The two dark-headed Slayers fought fiercely, each gaining then losing the advantage. Finally, though, Buffy felt Faith gaining the upper hand. As she prepared to deal her final blow, Buffy heard Willow speak very faintly in Faith’s head.

<Faith! Come on!>

Buffy felt Faith pause in confusion, and Kennedy saw her chance. She snatched a hooked knife from her belt and shoved it deep into Faith’s stomach. Buffy felt searing pain in her abdomen and bent over, putting a hand on the floor to brace herself. She was too deep in a trance to be woken up from the vision, but Faith’s face returned and the searing pain faded to a dull, throbbing ache.

Faith continued her story. <I didn’t feel the pain at first... I was just royally pissed off. So I slugged her out cold and ran. Found Willow just a few yards from the place and got the hell out of there. Made it to the woods, but heard a group of girls coming up behind us. I was bleeding like a stuck pig and Willow could hardly walk, so they were gaining fast. Told Willow to go on or I’d kill her myself, and I’d stay behind to tie up loose ends. And here I am,> Faith finished calmly, <lying here, looking up at the stars through the trees and talking to you. Not quite the way I’d want to go, but I guess considering my skewed life-story, it could’ve been worse.>

<Faith, no,> Buffy said. <We can find you, get you help.>

<This is the way it is, yo,> Faith said. <This is my time... I know it. Besides, I’m not the one who can bring all these girls back together, end the insanity. You’re the only one who can do that. And maybe it’s the impending death talking, but I’m glad it’s you. I’m glad you’ll be giving these girls direction and training on how to use their powers, instead of abusing them like I did. I didn’t know it then, but this is what being a Slayer is all about – using my powers and putting myself on the block for everybody else. And maybe, just maybe, we get something great in return. I had my time with Wood, traveling and fighting and uh, other things... maybe one day you’ll have that too.>

Faith’s face began to get fuzzy. <Faith, no! Wait!> Buffy called to her.

<I gotta jet, B,> Faith replied as the image of her face grew more fuzzy and dim. <Wherever it is I end up, I’ll save you a seat.>

And she was gone.

Buffy awoke and slowly opened her eyes, still bent over double onto the floor. She felt immense sadness, knowing that Faith, her Slayer-sister, had died. In addition to her emotional pain, she still felt the ache of Kennedy’s knife from Faith’s vision. Buffy pulled her feet to her chest and layed in the fetal position on the floor. Fatigue, anxiety, loss, and pain gripped her until she felt like her heart was going to stop dead in her chest. The feeling grew, spreading up from her stomach into her chest and neck, until hot tears formed in her eyes and she could no longer hold them back. Without a sound, she let them come, steaming down her face, echoed by deep, heavy breaths. Please, I need help, Buffy cried desperately. Can’t anyone see I’m not strong enough to do this anymore?

Instantly, a blinding flash of light exploded in the center of the room. A deafening boom of thunder blared through the room and Buffy bolted up. Another boom, and something large and heavy dropped from the air. Buffy squinted to get a better look, but the light was too bright. The shape hit the floor, rolled a few feet then pounced upright into a standing position.

The rolls of thunder faded away and a final flare of blinding light flashed before disappearing. There in the center of the room, in a fighting stance, stood Spike.

“What the hell?!” he exclaimed, glancing all around him.

Buffy stared in disbelief. Unsure if she was awake or still in the trance, she spoke tentatively. “Spike?”

His glance fell on her and he froze in amazement. “Buffy?”

“Are you real?” she asked slowly.

He gripped his own arms and shoulders to prove it, more to himself than to her. “In the undead flesh.”

Buffy approached him hesitantly, afraid that if she moved too fast he would vanish as quickly as he had appeared.

Spike watched her as she came closer. She was beautiful and alive, and he was alive and with her and--

Without warning Buffy had thrown her arms around him and hugged him fiercely. Surprised, Spike stood motionless in confusion. Oh bollocks, he then thought, as he put his arms around Buffy.

“You’re real,” she whispered, almost unbelieving.

“Um, yes,” he answered slowly as he rubbed her back. “What’s all this about, now?” he asked her as she drew away. “What’s going on?”

She blinked. “You just showed up in a cloud of blaze and glory and you’re asking what’s happening with me?” Buffy asked. “What happened to you? Where have you been?”

“What?!” Spike asked non-chalantly. “I was dead, went all Casper-like at Angel’s, got my rocks back, there was a thing, and now I’m here. What?”

“You were with Angel?”

“Bloody hell!” Spike bellowed. “If you’re wishin’ I was the poofter, then you can f–“

Buffy threw her arms around him again. “No!” she cried. “I’m glad it’s you.” She looked up at him. “I’m really glad it’s you.”

He smiled. “Well okay then.”

Across the room Buffy’s door flew open and Xander and Dawn rushed into the room.

“What happened?”

“We heard a noise--”

Seeing Spike, they stopped short, speechless.

Buffy realized she and Spike were still hugging, so she slowly took a step back. Spike sighed in frustration. Here we go again...

“Spike,” Dawn finally said. “I thought you died.”

“So did I, Niblet,” he replied.

“Are you evil?” Xander asked.

Buffy took another step back, a wary look on her face. Spike gave her an exasperated look. “No, I’m still me.”

“Which begs the question... are you evil?” Xander repeated.

“No!” Spike said. He turned to Buffy. “I’ve still got my soul.”

“Oh, well that makes all the difference,” Dawn remarked sarcastically.

“I didn’t hear you complaining before,” Spike said pointedly.

“Enough!” Buffy interrupted. She glared at all of them. “This is so not what I need right now. Let’s just–“

<Buffy...>

Buffy paused. “Willow?”

Xander, Dawn and Spike exchanged confused looks. “Buffy?” Dawn asked. “What is it?”

Buffy silenced Dawn as she heard the voice again. <Buffy... help... mailbox...>

“Help the mailbox?” Buffy said aloud. Suddenly a vision of Giles’ mailbox flashed in her mind. “Giles’ mailbox!” she cried. “Willow’s at the end of the drive!”

Buffy took off with Spike one step behind. They tore through the house and raced down the gravel driveway. Within seconds, they found Willow, barely conscious, slumped on the ground.

“Willow,” Buffy called as she propped Willow’s head on her lap. “Are you okay? Are you hurt?”

Willow barely opened her eyes. “Spike?” she utterred hoarsely. “Am I dead?”

“No, luv,” Spike said. “Neither of us are dead.”

“Oh,” she replied, then passed out.

“Willow!” Xander called, panting, as he and Dawn ran to them.

“Is she okay?” Dawn asked, worried.

“She just passed out,” Buffy answered. “But I don’t see any blood.”

Xander kneeled and gingerly picked up Willow’s arm. “She looks awful, Buffy,” he said, inspecting Willow’s arm. “And her arms are all scraped up. What happened to her?”

“I don’t know,”Buffy answered. “But we need to get her cleaned up and in bed.”

“I’ll get her some clean clothes,” Dawn said, taking off towards the house.

“I’ll get the First Aid kit ready,” Xander added, right behind Dawn.

Buffy looked over at Spike. “Spike, can you...?”

As if he read her mind, Spike slid his arms under Willow’s body and lifted her easily from the ground.

Silently, they began walking up the long drive. Buffy looked straight ahead as they walked, but Spike studied Buffy intently. After a few minutes, he turned his attention to Willow’s limp body that he was carrying and shifted the load in his arms.

“You okay?” Buffy asked.

He nodded. “I think the question you need to be asking is, are you okay?” Buffy looked back at him in surprise. “You look like hell, Slayer.”

She looked down. “We’re having a bit of a crisis here,” she admitted.

“Aren’t you always?”

Buffy shrugged in reluctant agreement, but didn’t go on.

Spike stopped and faced her. “Buffy, what the hell is going on here?”

She sighed. “Well,” she began as they started walking again, “you remember when we did that spell last year to give all the potential Slayers in the world my power... to become real Slayers? Turns out, there was a reason why they were potential Slayers and not the Slayer because some of them have a major case of the gimme’s. They think because they’re ‘chosen’ that they deserve more than the average bear and they’ve been on a rampage taking whatever they want, destroying anything – and anyone – who gets in their way. They’re stealing, causing riots, and even started killing people. People, not demons or vampires, but people. And we think Kennedy is their new boss.”

“Who?” Spike interrupted.

“Willow’s old girlfriend,” Buffy answered, but Spike showed no recognition. “The really bitchy potential who was out to get me?”

“Oh right,” Spike realized.

“She kidnapped Willow five days ago and we tried everything we could to find her, but nothing worked. So Faith volunteered–“

”Faith?” Spike interrupted again. “I thought she was globe-trotting with Principal Wood-Up-His-Ass.”

“Spike,” Buffy said softly. “He’s dead.”

“Principal Demon-Fighter’s dead? I should probably be upset about that.” He paused. “Oh well.”

Buffy rolled her eyes then continued. “Faith volunteered to play the double-agent - pretend to join up with the Rogue Slayers then get Willow out. She did, obviously, but I had a vision and... now she’s dead too.”

“Faith’s dead too? Damn.”

“It gets better,” Buffy said sarcastically. “Giles has been gone for almost a week to get more information about the rogue Slayers. But we haven’t heard from him at all and I’m afraid he might be in trouble. But,” Buffy’s rant began to gain steam, “I’m also really pissed off at him because he basically said he doesn’t have faith in my decision-making anymore. Both he and Xander think this is all my fault because I won’t–“

”The whelp thinks its your fault and you believe him?” Spike interrupted. “How many demons has he attracted over the years?”

Buffy sighed and rubbed her eyes. “He has a name,” she said warningly.

“Don’t change the subject, luv,” Spike said as he shifted Willow again. “How in bloody hell do they think this is your fault?”

Buffy looked Spike square in the face. “They think the only way to deal with the rogue Slayers is to kill them. Kill humans. And I won’t do it.”

A strange look passed over Spike’s face. “These rogue Slayers,” he said slowly. “What do you know about them?”

“Not much,” Buffy admitted, not noticing Spike’s expression. “Before he left, Giles told me that something similar happened back during World War II, but it wasn’t anything helpful.”

“What did he tell you?” Spike pressed further.

Buffy absently kicked a stone as she talked. “Just that a Nazied-up Slayer and her gal pals thought it would be cool to hold the Council hostage so they could rule the world. But just as it was getting down to the wire, the girls simply vanished and presto, no apocalypse. Of the supernatural kind, anyway.”

They reached the door way as Spike spoke. “Buffy,” Spike began. “There’s something I need to–“

”Oh, yeah,” Buffy remembered absently. “Come in, Spike.”

”There you are!” Dawn interrupted from the top of the stairs. “Geez, did you take the long way through France to get here?”she scolded them as she descended.

“Sorry,” Buffy apologized. “Spike’s carrying dead weight.”

“But she’s not dead,” Dawn reminded them.

“Yeah, no thanks to you,” Xander shot a glance at Buffy as he took Willow from Spike’s arms. “I’ll take her from here.”

“Look, mate, I–“ Spike began.

“I’m not your mate,” Xander snapped, as he started up the stairs.

“Xander,” Buffy said. “Let me help–“

”Buffy,” Xander said as he turned around. “What would help is if you would go out there and kick some rogue Slayer ass, which is what you should have been doing to begin with. If you had been doing that, this,” he hefted Willow in his arms, “wouldn’t have happened.” He stomped up the stairs, leaving Dawn, Buffy and Spike standing silently below him.

Dawn spoke first. “Buffy, I’m not saying this is your fault,” she said gently, “but we do need a plan. Magic or fighting or whatever, but we need something.” She paused and touched Buffy’s arm. “This is only going to get worse.” She turned and slowly went up the stairs.

Buffy watched her go, knowing her sister was right. She thought about the severity of their situation and a feeling of hopelessness welled up in her gut. Spike watched Buffy’s face as it fell. She needs something to fight, he thought knowingly.

“Been sittin’ on your hands, eh, Slayer?” he needled. “Falling down on the job?”

Her head jerked up at his words.

“Should have known you’d give in sooner or later.”

Buffy’s eyes flashed. “Shut up, Spike.”

He knew he’d hit a nerve. Come on, girl... fight. “I must admit you had everyone fooled into thinking you’re a fighter. Guess you can’t handle a challenge,” he said, gesturing her to step up.

“You have no idea what you’re talking about,” she said firmly.

“Right then,” he said, opening the front door. “I’ll just be on my merry way.” Fight me, you stupid bint!

Buffy shook her head. “Should’ve known–you come back pretending to be all nice and ensouled then you turn around and stab me in the back!”

Spike stood in the open doorway. “Stabbing? I wonder...do you even remember how to do that?”

Buffy growled as she pounced on Spike, sending them both tumbling into the darkened yard. “How dare you?!” Buffy exclaimed as she attacked Spike. “I can still wipe the ground with your sorry ass.”

She pinned him and punched him several times before Spike kicked Buffy off and delivered several blows of his own. His insides twisted every time he made contact, but he knew Slayers and he knew Buffy – this fight had been building in her for a long time and she needed to get it out.

“You don’t know anything about me!” she declared as she tired herself out, kicking and punching. “I don’t need you coming back into my life and telling me how messed up everything is... again! I can handle this!” She punched again, but Spike caught her fists and pulled them behind her back.

Buffy kept struggling. “I will find a way–I always find a way. I don’t need you...” Her struggling weakened and her head fell against his chest. “I don’t need you,” she repeated less loudly. “I always find a way... I’ll find a way...”

Buffy’s voice faded and her shoulders went limp. Spike released her fists and put his arms around her. “I know, luv... you will,” he said softly.

Buffy inhaled as if a sob were about to break from her throat, but only a few weary tears slipped from her eyes. Her body had been pushed to the brink of fatigue and stress and simply did not have any energy left after their scuffle. Spike heard Buffy’s previously accelerated heartbeat slow to an alarmingly slow rate.

He picked her up and climbed the stairs to her bedroom. He laid her on the bed and within minutes she was asleep. Spike gently brushed a strand of hair from her face before settling himself on the opposite side of the bed. He kicked his shoes off and stretched, folding his arms behind his head, and stared at the ceiling. What the bloody hell are we in to now?





Chapter Thirteen

Spike woke first the next morning, and although he knew it must have been late in the morning, he found Buffy still curled snuggly next to him. Her head was resting on his chest and he could hear the slow and steady beat of her heart. She was sleeping deeply and peacefully, something he suspected she had not done in a very long time. He gently brought one of her hands to his lips and kissed it softly, and held it against his chest. She stirred, and slowly opened her eyes.

“Wh-what?” she mumbled groggily, as she struggled to raise her head. She looked up at Spike with confusion.

“G’morning, Goldilocks,” Spike said, admiring the disarray of her long, blonde hair.

Buffy moaned. “Do I have bed hair?” she asked sleepily.

Spike grinned mischeviously. “You’ve had worse.”

Buffy lightly slapped his chest in response, but made no other signs of moving from her prone position next to him. After a moment, Spike spoke.

“Feel better?”

“Physically, yes,” Buffy replied. “I can’t remember the last time I had a good night’s sleep. But,” she paused, “one night’s sleep doesn’t change the fact that my best friend got kidnapped, my other best friend hates my guts, my Watcher’s gone MIA, and there’s hundreds of girls out there as strong as me who want to take over the world.”

“Why are you letting all this stuff get under your skin?” Spike asked. “You’re the soddin’ Slayer... you can handle this.”

Buffy sighed and sat up. “I guess it’s because I’ve never really had to face a human enemy before. Before, the rules were simple: vampire... evil... kill. But now the enemy is human, and there aren’t any rules for that. And these girls–these rogue Slayers–they’re serious.” She paused and look down, ashamed. “ And I don’t know what to do about it.”

“What does your gut tell you to do?” Spike asked.

Buffy looked up. “What do you mean?”

“Your special spidey-sense... Slayer instincts and what-all,” Spike answered.

Buffy frowned in thought. “Giles thinks I should be prepared to kill these girls if necessary. But everything in me says that’s not the answer... a Slayer is not a killer.”

“Then you’ll find another way,” Spike said simply.

“How can you be so sure?” Buffy asked doubtfully.

“How many apocalypses have you stopped?” Spike asked bluntly. “How many times has there been a prophecy that you have defied? How many times have the odds been stacked against you and you fought back and won? You have saved the world so many times, even when you had less than a snowball’s chance... and this time will be no different.”

“I just don’t know if–“

”Look, Slayer,” Spike continued hastily, “this whole self-doubt thing is bloody depressing and frankly, it’s pissing me off. You’re the soddin’ Slayer... the holy chosen one and all that rot. You need to get up off your arse and do something. And whatever it is,” he softened his tone and looked into her face, “it’ll be the right choice.”

Buffy listened to Spike’s words, and her spirits were lifted by his confidence. They paused, looking deep into one another’s eyes.

Just then, someone knocked on the door. “Okay, you two,” Dawn’s voice came through the door. “The rest of the world does exist.”

Spike and Buffy looked away awkwardly. “I guess I better check on Willow,” Buffy said weakly. She scooted off the bed and left the room quickly, leaving a disappointed Spike still sitting on the bed.

Buffy rounded the corner into Willow’s room, and stopped abruptly when she saw Xander already visiting with her friend. They exchanged awkward “hey’s” then remained silent. Xander absently picked at the bedspread while Buffy stood fidgeting by the bed. Finally, Willow spoke.

“Okay, you two, what did I miss? Why are you being all avoidy?”

Buffy and Xander looked at one another, at Willow, then back at each other.

“Well, we had a slight...”

“I didn’t... and he didn’t...”

“Xander blames all this on Buffy and Buffy feels guilty about it on top of not knowing what to do about the whole rogue Slayer thing,” Dawn suddenly interjected from the doorway. They all stared at her. “I brought tea...” she showed the mug, “and much needed clarity.”

A sense of levity settled on the group of friend and they all smiled, although cautiously. After a moment, Xander stood and addressed Buffy.

“I’ve been a horrible troll to you lately. I was so worried about Willow that I took it all out on you. Do you think you could ever forgive me?”

Buffy stepped closer to them. “Only if you can forgive me for letting my job get in the way of doing my job and protecting the people I love.”

Xander smiled warmly and readily accepted Buffy’s outstretched hand. “You really are the heart of us,” she said.

“Hey, don’t forget the brains of this here operation,” Willow piped up from the bed below them. They chuckled.

“What am I?” Dawn asked as she set Willow’s tea beside the bed.

“You can be the hair,” Buffy said.

“Huh?”

Buffy explained with a teasing grin. “You don’t serve any known functional purpose, but you make us look pretty.”

“My, someone’s in a good mood this morning,” Dawn said sarcastically. “Did you wake up on Spike’s side of the bed this morning?”

“Dawn!” Buffy warned.

“It’s alright, Buffy,” Xander said. “We know Spike spent the night with you last night.”

“So I did see Spike last night!” Willow realized. “I thought it was some weird, light-at-the-end-of-the-tunnel dream.”

“Wait a minute,” Buffy interrupted. “You guys know about Spike... and you’re okay with it? Am I in another bizzaro universe again?”

“Well, okay is not exactly how I would describe my feelings about you and Spike,” Xander said. “Tolerant with a side of indigestion is closer to the actual.”

“But Buffy,” Willow said, “I’m sure I look rough from my ordeal and all, but you haven’t looked this rested and relaxed in weeks. Whatever it is that Spike does to you–uh, I mean, for you... whatever it is that Spike does for you, it’s good for you.”

“Well,” Buffy began slowly, “Spike isn’t doing anything to me or for me or with me. All I know is I’m glad he’s here— we’ll need him in this fight, and... I need him in this.”

“Far be it from me to give love advice concerning current or former demons,” Xander remarked with a bittersweet smile.

“I just hope Giles will be as accepting as you guys,” Buffy said.

“Have you heard from him at all?” Willow asked hopefully.

“No, Wil,” Xander answered sadly. “Nothing.”

Dawn huffed. “Well, I can’t believe he would just skip out all of a sudden-like, then we go for like weeks without hearing so much as a–“

”I’m home!” a familiar voice called out.

The four friends stared at one another for a moment, not daring to believe what they heard. They heard footsteps, then suddenly Giles was standing in Willow’s doorway. “Why are you all in here...?” he began to ask, then paused as he saw Willow in bed. “What happened?”

Dawn threw herself on Giles in a big bear-hug, and Xander crossed the room to join the hug. Buffy remained where she was, uncertain if Giles was still unhappy with her.

“Hiya, Giles,” Willow said cheerfully. “Just a pesky old head-cold... nothing to worry about here.”

“Uh-huh,” he replied as he approached the bed. “And why don’t I believe you?”

“Because I’m a horrible liar?” Willow answered sheepishly.

“Hi, Giles,” Buffy said cautiously.

“Buffy,” Giles greeted her warmly and welcomed her into a hug. She accepted eagerly and hugged him tightly. “Can you forgive an old man for being foolish?” Giles asked her gently. She smiled in reponse. “In my travels and research, I’ve realized that you were right to be cautious. And it was atrocious for me to suggest you kill those girls.” Ashamed, he stumbled over his words. “Once again, you have shown that you truly have grown as a person and as a Slayer and that you really don’t need a teacher anymore.”

“Of course I forgive you, Giles,” Buffy graciously said, then grinned mischeviously. “But I get gloating rights for at least six months.”

“Six months!” Giles exclaimed in jest. “I’ll agree to four and not a day more.”

“Done,” Buffy replied, laughing. The gang shared a playful moment, happy that everyone was home and happy with one another once again.

Just then, Spike knocked on the door. “Thought I’d pop in to see how the witch was...” he trailed off when he saw Giles.

Giles froze, then slowly turned his gaze towards Buffy. “How...?”

“We’ve got a lot to talk about.”

“Indeed,” Giles responded.

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