The Heart Throb

"Is that the new kid?" I turned to my classmate, Mabel.

"Where?" Mabel spun around, her eyes roaming the crowd.

"There.. That one in the white shirt," I nodded towards my left.

There was a silence.

"Oh.. That. I don't know." Mabel shrugged, dismissing the new kid at once.

I furrowed my eyebrows and turned to her, my hands on my hips. Then i realised. She wasn't on the same book that i was on. She was looking at this other dorky kid standing near the washroom. He had glasses the size of oreo cookies, and he was hunched over his books, his eyes darting from side to side, trying to dodge the crowd. I looked at him, and felt a pang of sympathy. But i quickly regained my composure and feeling bewildered, i looked right back at Mabel.

"Mabs..? I wasn't talking about HIM. That's Mark. He's not even new," I stared at her wide-eyed.

She raised one of her eyebrows in her cool dismissive way, in the way that i could never muster no matter how many times i practised in front of the mirror, and tilted her head to the side, her short bob bouncing up and down.

"No? Well, i never noticed him. So who were you talking about? What- which new kid?"

I turned to look for the new kid, a smile starting to creep up my lips. And then i felt my heart plummeted to the pit of my stomach. Mabs must have seen the disappointed look i had on my face because she was eyeing me suspiciously.
She jabbed me on my arm impatiently, hand on one hip.

"Err, hello, Jen? The bell just went, we have to go."

Mabs was already pulling on my hand. I followed her, but my eyes were still wild in the crowd, searching for that girl in the white shirt. The new kid had gone. The tall one, with the messy hair-do, those blue eyes (well i never really did see her eyes, but I’m guessing that it’s blue. Probably indigo, even) and that strong aura. Where had she gone?

It wasn’t until the end of school that i saw her again. Boy was i in ecstatics. I could feel my face go red hot as i watched her move across the hallway. Oh how she moved. She looked up once, and i swear she was looking at me. I think she saw me looking. I looked away at once, pretending to sift through my Calculus book. Oh how daft, i thought. But it didn’t matter. I was so nervous that i was prepared to seek solace in anything. I finally looked up, my heart beating fast. I took a peek from behind my book, covering everything but my eyes.

“Oh, she’s gone again?” i whispered under my breath.

I could practically feel my face droop as i dropped my eyes. I dropped my book and turned around, sighing deeply.

“Oh, sorry,” i gushed, feeling stupid. I just slammed face first into someone’s body. Someone very sweet smelling and warm. Someone who smelt of strawberries and chocolate. Someone..... Oh my god.

“Oh dear fuck,” i muttered to myself. I looked up and tried hard not to smile too obviously. She was so good looking. Obviously gay. But what attracted me more to her was how shy she seemed. How she glanced down at her shoes, only briefly making eye contact, yet at the same time, the way she hovered around me made me feel like she was waiting for something. Some acknowledgement. I stared straight into her eyes, mustering an apologetic look but i blushed instead. Oh dear lord, look at those blue eyes! I wanted to slap myself at that moment. Anything to stop me from gawking like an idiot. I was suddenly aware of how my mouth was slightly apart. Finally, she opened her mouth. I prayed to God that she wasn’t registering me as an idiot.

“I’m sorry, are you okay?” she asked, her eyes apologetic, enquiring.

They were blue, i noticed. And as i let my eyes quickly scan her body, i saw that she was actually pretty toned. Her white t-shirt clung onto her stomach tightly. So tightly that i could almost work out the abs underneath. And as i ran my eyes upwards, i saw two almost imperceptible humps on her chest. Boobs. She was a real woman after all. Hurrah, i silently congratulated myself. I looked up at her again and saw her blush a little. This made me blush in return.

“I’m fine. I’m sorry, i wasn’t looking,” i said, cupping the loose strands of hair fringing my face behind my ear.

She pushed her messy fringe out of her eyes and we kind of stood looking at each other for a few seconds. She wasn’t moving yet, and i didn’t want to go anywhere. She opened her mouth as if to say something but right at that moment, i saw Mabs coming from the distance. I knew i had to be quick. I can’t let her catch me talking to the new kid like this. She would talk too much, bombard me with too many questions.
Yes, she hasn’t gotten over the fact that her best friend here, is indeed into girls. I love Mabs dearly, but sometimes, i just wished she would understand me more. She kept telling me that this was a phase i was going through.
It was frustrating. But i kept quiet. I learnt that as long as i kept my mouth shut, she would shut up too. And everything would be perfect. Our friendship would be strong as ever. She would be happy. And i’d pretend to be happy although inside, it feels like someone is stabbing me, over and over.

So i saw Mabs approaching, a huge grin plastered on her face.

“Uh, i’ll see you around then, i gotta go,” i said, trying not to let the disappointment show.

(will be continued)