My break up with Edward

As anyone who has known me for more than a year knows, I was once the craziest of the Twilight fans. I would scream whenever anyone mentioned Edward's name, physically force my friends to read the books, and then argue with them, usually stating that Edward was mine. Sometimes blood was shed in these arguments, but mostly friendships remained intact.

Eventually Edward had worked his way into every aspect of my life. I wrote quotes and Edward's name all over my notebooks at school. I paid much more attention in school if I could connect what I was learning with the books in some way. I began to check Stepheniemeyer.com more than I checked Facebook. I read fanfiction to keep tabs on what my boyfriend was doing.

And that is what he had become. I had made him into my boyfriend. I was showing more emotional attachment to Edward than I was showing my friends. I have to admit to myself: I was becoming obsessive. Edward made up for my obsession by being overprotective. But alas, our love was even more doomed. Eventually I realized the truth that I had always known. Edward was cheating on me with literally millions of other girls. Even worse was the fact that many of those girls were also my closest friends. I didn't know what to do. I was angry, but I didn't want to let go. I knew there was no way that Edward would ever change his ways, but I stayed with him anyway. That is when our relationship began to fray. I began to read other books and do other things. Edward tried to get me to spend more time with him, but I told him that I needed a little space. When I did spend time with him, it just wasn't the same. I realized that I was forcing myself to read the book for the sake of what had been in the past. It just wasn't the same anymore. I began to see the flaws in Edward's character. He was clingy. He seemed to believe that he knew what was good for me better than I knew myself. His mindreading powers, which I had found attractive when I first started dating him, began to get annoying. The things he said turned cheesy in my mind.

Then I met someone else. He wasn't pushy or arrogant like Edward. THe things he said did not sound rehearsed or cheesy. I fell for him in a way I could never have fallen for Edward.

The break up was messy. Edward refused to let go. He constantly called and begged me to come back. I wasn't fooled. I heard the voices of screaming fangirls in the background.

Everybody still think that we are together. I guess I can't blame them. He was a large part of my life for so long. Occasionally I will check in on Edward and see how he is doing, but I see him as more of a friend than anything. I hope he sees me the same way. I've found a real guy who is better for me than Edward ever was.

I can't regret my time with Edward. He taught me a lot about everything. But he and I would never have worked. I want to be my boyfriend's only girlfriend, and that is how it is.