History of Jesus

In the year 1885 there was a man that went by the name of Charles Alderton and he was a fan of the holy bible. Now this Alderton owned a pharmaceutical establishment of the highest order and one thing you must understand is that pharmaceutical establishments at this time offered much more then just medicine.

Alderton theorized that since Jesus was everywhere and was always watching, that he could, by some hop of logic (not even a leap mind you), take a bit of everything and put it back together into a drink. A drink that would contain the very essence of our savior.

Now for this story to continue to make sense, two facts must be made known to you. It is a little known fact that Jesus was a Doctor, and that his last name was pepper.

So this Alderton fellow takes a bit of everything good tasting in the world and puts it into a glass. He then names the drink after our lord and savior; Dr. Pepper.

Now I know what you're thinking. The guy died for our sins, I think we know him well enough to call him by his first name. I mean Jesus is my homeboy. But back then people were sticklers for formality so Alderton decided to call Jesus by his formal title of; Dr. Pepper.

Now years went by and everyone forgot what the drink was named after. But it was eventually sold to the Dr Pepper Snapple Group inc. (Jesus Snapple Group inc.) and sold nationally in the States, Canada and Britain.

Calling Jesus by his formal title was all well and good back in the day, but now, it's kind of lame to go about calling him a doctor. It probably makes him feel really old. So call that drink you just love to drink by it's first name: So the Jesus Snapple group can continue to make quality beverages that are infused with the spirit, strength and will of our savior; Doctor Jesus Christ Pepper.