The Wacky Adventures of Chris and Dave 4

Chris: so were going to a military base

Dave: yeah

Chris: alright cool, cool

Dave: yep

Chris: so how’d we get out of the mall with the escalators being all full with zombies?

Dave: I rode you like a sled down the done escalator

Chris: well that would explain the huge gashes on my stomach

Dave: yep

Chris: you’re a fuck you know that

Dave: so I’ve been told that

THE WACKY ADEVNTURES OF CHRIS AND DAVE PART 4

Chris: are we there yet

Dave: no

Chris: how bout now?

Dave: no

Chris: now?

Dave: nope

Chris: now?

Dave: Chris, we’ve been standing in the same spot for the past ten minutes

Chris: yeah I knew that I was umm just testing you

Dave: sure

Chris: so why are we just standing here

Dave: I’m trying to figure out which way the base is

Chris: I thought it was to the north

Dave: do you know which was north is

Chris: no where’s my GPS when we need it

Dave: back in your car maybe?

Chris: that son of a bitch

Dave: alright we’ll just walk until we see a road sign pointing us in the right direction

Chris: okeedokee

-A few short moments later-

Dave: well the sign says we follow this road

Chris: K

Dave: so lets get going

Chris: whoo it’s traveling time and do you now what this calls for

Dave: no

Chris: traveling music

Dave: god help us

Chris: lay me down a beat buddy

Dave: no

Chris: come on

Dave: I refuse

Chris: don’t be a stick in the mud

Dave: fuck off

Chris: just do it ass hole

Dave: fine. Ding

Chris: that’s not a beat

Dave: I wish there was a car coming towards us

Chris: why?

Dave: so I could push you in front of it

Chris: hehe funny jack ass. Fine no music lets just talk

Dave: must we

Chris: either that or I get to sing

Dave: ok we’ll talk

Chris: sooooooo

Dave: …

Chris: I got nothing

Dave: figures

Chris: that what she said

Dave: that didn’t make sense at all

Chris: no it did

Dave: how

Chris: it just did shut up

Dave: ….

Chris: fuck off and die!

Dave: I told you we already are dead

Chris: yeah, yeah and everyone else is dead to but then how do you explain THEM!

Dave: holy shit a living person, FOOD!

Chris: YAY!

Dave: come on Chris screw the base there’s food like 20 feet away

Chris: I WANT MEH FOOD


-from the perspective of the survivor-

Survivor: oh shit…ZOMBIES! Gotta get inside…BILL!

Bill: what the fuck are you yelling about dude

Dude: there’s zombies out side

Bill: oh shit quick grab the guns

Dude: I’m on it Bill

-back to Chris and Dave-


Chris: open the door please I wants to eat you

Dave: their not going to open the door just cause your pounding on it

Chris: then I’ll break it down, OPEN THE FUCKING DOOR

Dave: I doubt your gonna break it do-

Chris: look I broke it down

Dave: wow just wow

Chris: quick inside

Dave: watch out they may have guns

Chris: OH MY GOD THEY SHOT ME

Dave: where?

Chris: naw just kidding

Bill: shoot em dude

Dude: alright

Chris: ok now they got me

Dave: maybe coming in the front door isn’t a good idea

Chris: ok what your other idea

Dave: go around back and bust into a window

Chris: k

-a few minutes later-

Bill: watch out dude they might be coming round back watch the window

Dude: got it, Bill

Chris: BRAINS!

Dude: AH! HE’S GOT ME BILL

Chris: now grab the fat one

Bill: Dude where’d ya go?

Dave: yoink

Bill: AH!

-one full belly later-

Chris: so delicious

Dave: yep

Chris: so good

Dave: yeah

Chris: those guys were retards

Dave: not everyone we run into is gonna be like them

Chris: you mean they’ll be more retarded

Dave: no they’ll be smarter

Chris: ooh well that sucks

Dave: eh just try not to get shot next time. Where’d he hit you any way

Chris: in my leg

Dave: it hurt

Chris: naw it was the leg that came off in the escalator incident

Dave: oh hehe that still makes me laugh

Chris: I hope you die

Dave: the feelings mutual buddy

Chris: so now what

Dave: lets start heading to the base again

Chris: why we got food

Dave: were gonna be hungry again

Chris: are you sure?

Dave: …yes…

Chris: hmm ok

Dave: lets get goin

Chris: alright time for more traveling music