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by Roscoe Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ · Short Story · Contest · #1422851
Winning entry for W. D. Wilcox's Dialogue 500 #34
"Hiya! How's she cuttin'? Waitin' long?"

"No."

"Any sign of the 22b? Been late every day this week. I'm late myself now so the bleeder is probably on time today. Seen a 22b?"

"No."

"Typical! What did I tell you? Late again! And then as sure as night follows day there'll be three along together. The drivers must think they're in Injun territory. Watched too much Wagon Train when they were kids, I reckon. The missus will be givin' me earache again tonight. Dinner ruined, yakkity yak, every day this week, yakkity yak, no consideration for anybody, yakkity yak. God love her, she has a heart of gold but can she give out, or can she give out! If it was an Olympic sport she'd get the gold medal. The gold medal. I kid you not. You married?"

"Yes."

"You'll know what I'm talking about then. The wimmin folk can't half talk, can't they? Hard to get a word in edgeways sometimes. I told her we should get a microwave and she could leave my dinner on the counter but she won't hear of it. Says she wants kids and says she read somewhere the radiation from microwaves can circumcise a man. You heard of that? I think she's getting mixed up with Mumps, myself. They wouldn't be allowed to sell microwaves if that was true, would they? "

"I think it unlikely."

"Yeah, thought not. Load of nonsense. Anyway she should be more worried about the noise insulation in our flats. There isn't any. You can hear your neighbour three doors down brush his teeth. Bit off-putting in the nuptial department if you know what I mean. It's an absolute disgrace actually. We've all got together and got up a petition to the Council complaining about it. They should never have given planning permission to the builder because it's definitely not up to building standards. Not that we'll get anywhere, mind you. Too many brown envelopes have changed hands in my opinion. You know what I mean? I had a friend worked in the Council a while back. She said it was shameful what was going on. Said if you bunged a few thousand to the right people in the Council you could save yourself a fortune in building costs. Same the whole world over, eh? It's the rich what gets the pleasure / It's the poor what gets the pain eh?"

"It would appear so."

"What bus are you waiting for?"

"17a."

"Glenview? Is that where you live?"

"Yes."

"Very nice! Now they are proper houses. I did a bit of free-lance window cleaning around there between jobs. Very nice indeed! I'd say now, you wouldn't be a man who would take the bus too often. Am I wrong, or am I wrong? Let me guess, you work for a law firm, or one of them stock broking firms in the city. Am I right?"

"The Council. Planning Department. And this, I believe, is my bus."


500 words.
© Copyright 2008 Roscoe (rconkling at Writing.Com). All rights reserved.
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