The Job - Scene One

A bar.  Two young women, Marianne and Isabelle, are standing at the bar, observing the crowd.

ISABELLE          Come on, Marianne!  Just go over and talk to him.
MARIANNE          No! He doesn´t even know I´m alive.  If he was interested he´d come talk to me.
ISABELLE          Oh, please.  He totally wants your balls, dude.
MARIANNE          Excuse me?!?
ISABELLE          Your metaphorical balls, relax (pats Marianne´s crotch gently, to which Marianne responds by elbowing Isabelle away).  If you had a nutsack, which for this hypothetical situation would be completely normal, he would be all over it.  He´d probably even lick it -
MARIANNE          (overlapping) Oh, my God. 
ISABELLE          The point is that he is definitely into you.  So stop being a pussy and go over there.
MARIANNE          I´m totally fine with being a pussy, thank you.  There´s a flaw in your great testicular theory:  If he really does want me, why doesn´t he come over here?
ISABELLE          Oh, young disciple, you lack the faith.  In order for you to possess your balls -
MARIANNE          (overlapping don´t have balls!
ISABELLE          - he has to give up his own.  Look around.  We live in a society where it has become the norm for men to be weak.  Personally, I blame metrosexuality.  Women have become stronger and more independent so men took it as a cue to become weaker.  Really, all men are pansies.  They just never let on to it before because someone had to be the stronger sex.  Feminism came along and every man breathed a sigh of relief because it meant they could FINALLY retreat to their shells, where they would wax their eyebrows, mousse their hair and put their testicles in a jar on a very high shelf - something to be admired, but never utlized. 
MARIANNE          Sounds to me like what you´re really blaming is feminism.  Do we maybe not want to be an independent woman anymore?  Could Isabelle be harboring secret desires to marry a rich man for whom to cook dinner and bear children?  In spite of all your tough "balls" talk, it seems like what you really want is to be a housewife in 1954.
ISABELLE          Fuck that.  I´m all for feminism - equal jobs, equal pay, woman president - (to an invisible bartender) two more please - (to Marianne) sign me up.  But ultimately, there´s a nature element that should take over.  The males in a species are always the pursuers, doing whatever it takes to woo the desirable female of their choice.  So no matter how strong women get, men should still chase them.
MARIANNE          I see your point, but according to your argument, I should let the men come to me.  Your theory contradicts itself.
ISABELLE          I said they should...but they don´t.  The reality is that there´s been a paradigm shift in society and we have to man up, if you will.
MARIANNE          I really hate that you´re a psych major.
ISABELLE          With a women´s studies minor.
MARIANNE          Goddamn, are you a lesbian yet?
ISABELLE          Sorry about the pun.
MARIANNE          Well, while you were formulating your senior thesis, my guy left.
ISABELLE          No, he didn´t.
MARIANNE          Where is he then?
ISABELLE          Bathroom.
MARIANNE          You´re a little bif of a stalker, aren´t you?
ISABELLE          I like to think of it as "overly observant."
MARIANNE          Oh! There he is.  Well, I guess I have to go over there now, at least to test out your theories.
ISABELLE          Great!  I´ll use the results in my thesis.
MARIANNE          Shut up.  (exits)

Isabelle stands around for a few moments, drinking her beer and fidgeting.  She seems to be looking for something - or someone.  Suddenly -

MARK                    Is this seat taken?

Mark, 25, is attractive, but not overly (or obviously) so.  More than anything he is chaming - the type of guy who has no enemies.

ISABELLE          It´s not a seat.
MARK                    In that case, is this open space perfectly sized for someone about my height and weight taken?
ISABELLE          Not anymore.
MARK                    Great!  (moves in next to Isabelle)
ISABELLE          Sorry, I should have been more clear.  I meant that my friend was just here.
MARK                    I´m sorry, should I leave?
ISABELLE          She seems to be hitting it off with her new...friend (gestures offstage towards Marianne´s exit).  I guess you can stay.
MARK                    Your enthusiasm is captivating.  But you must hear that all the time.
ISABELLE          Are you hitting on me?
MARK                    (caught off guard)  It would appear that I´m trying to.
ISABELLE          How about that?
MARK                    How about...what?
ISABELLE          I thought  your kind was a dying breed.
MARK                    I´m sorry?
ISABELLE          Don´t be.

Isabelle moves in on Mark.  End scene.