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Rated: GC · Non-fiction · Relationship · #1370754
When your secret is stumbled upon, by the one you love.
A friend, Sally (not her real name) had shared her grieve when her husband stumbled upon her darkest secret. This is her story…..                                                       



I had never been this  embarrassed  before.  Although  we’ve been  married  for  five

years, there is something about me that  I not at any time,  want my husband to know. 

My  dark  secret,  which  I’ve  kept  really  well  for  the  past  two  years, has  been 

discovered by him. Oh god! It’s such a shame!

    I’m a very adventurous woman.  I get bored with simplicity,  and  I  always  yearn

for something new and  exciting. My husband on the other  hand, is  unsophisticated

and  boring. I don’t  get  enough  satisfaction  in  my  love  life,  and  I’m  constantly 

left alone, as he’s always busy 24/7. Most of my time is  spent  on  cyberspace, brow-

sing  adult  sites  and  playing  online  games.  At  one  time,  I  hit  upon  a  website





that allows me to seek friends or  sex  partner  for  cybersex,  phone sex  and  skin  on 

skin  trial. I’m tempted, and decided to  register  as  a  member. The fun started  and  I 

just  couldn’t  get  enough. I  began  chatting  most  afternoons, and  I  enjoyed  being   

seduced by  men that  I  don’t even  knew.

    After  awhile, I  made up my  mind  to go out  to explore. I  met up  with  a  guy  to

have  fun,  joy  and  fulfilment.  I  did  the  activity  during  daytime,  and    I  still 

play  the  good wife  to  my  husband, doing  the  cooking, washing and  stuff. He  did

not find out  about  my outings, but he  did  asked, why I  stopped calling him.  I  told 

him, its no point hitting on his number because he is all time busy.

    Day after day,  I’m still enjoying my rendezvous.  I love  the technology,  as it  can

cure me from my boredom. I don’t feel contrite  with what I  did. I  just  felt  that  this

endeavour turn me to be a  better  wife  because  I ‘ve stop  calling and  disturbing  my

husband like I used to. I demand attention all the time and my husband, is too engaged

to fulfill my needs. It  might sounds weird to some people, but  that’s what I felt. After

about a year, I became more  adventurous and  started  to  take  pictures  of  my  naked

self . I took shots  of  me using a  digital  camera, and  deleted  it  soon  after  I  down-

load it  to the computer. I stored  it  in  my  e-mail, and  exchange  it  with my ‘buddy’.

My ‘buddy’  would take  shots  of  me  before we start  our  drama  in  the  hotel  room.

We  even  made  short  movies, and  he would  e-mail  it to me. I  became  wilder  and 

thought that  I’m able  keep it all to myself. One afternoon, when I  was about to  leave 

the house, my husband came back  unexpectedly. He asked me  where  I’m going,  and 





I told him that I’m on my way to meet  a  girlfriend  at  a  café. He offered  to drive me

there, and acting innocent, I accepted his offer. He dropped me at  the café. I waited till

he’s gone and hailed a taxi to my destination. Once, he saw an s.m.s on my phone from

my  ‘buddy’  saying  how  much  he  enjoyed  my  company. I  don’t  have  any  good 

explanation, and  so I  told  him, I  only  had  cyber sex  with  that ’buddy’. He retorted

that I’m insane,  and  demanded  me to end  my  foolish  pastime. 

    Things doesn’t always go smooth, and  I knew well that I’m  taking a very  big  risk

doing  this indecent  act.  I started  to  have  my  sense  back, and  regretted  everything.

I quitted going out, and for the first time, I  felt normal.My husband seemed happier for

I  don’t  know; whatever  reason and  I  felt much contented  . Then the moment  came.

I was going through my e-mail on  one occasion, deleting  everything  I  do not wish  to

keep.  My  husband  was  home  sound  asleep on  the  sofa,  in  addition,  his snoring

assured me that it’s safe to open my ‘inbox’. Halfway through it,  I went to the window

for a puff  of  cigarette, not thinking  that  he  would  wake up. He looks  tired  anyway! 

Suddenly his phone rang, he woke up, answer the call and sat in front of  the  computer.

I felt  like grabbing the mouse and ‘sign out’ (it’s a stupidity! why didn’t  I just pull off 

the socket!), but it will be too obvious that I’m hiding something. Then… his right hand

touched the mouse, my heart beats fast and my legs shivered.

    After the phone, he looked at me and  said ‘Honey! What on earth is this? I want an

answer! please, what is  in your mind when you did  these?!’. I have no answer,  I  was 

so embarrassed by what he saw on the screen; it’s my obscene  photos! I was  ashamed.

   



‘Forgive  me  dear!  those  are  my  past,  and  I  regret  it’  I    pleaded. I  don’t  dare

to looked up. I felt so  degraded  and  mortified. I  ran  to  the  bedroom, locked myself

up and cried. I heard him screaming, saying that only abnormal people would  do  such

things. He banged on the door and I was afraid that he would beat me. How  do  I  face

him? what am I to say?. As a wife, I had disgraced him, and I don’t  think  I’ll get any- 

more respect from him. I opened the door,  grabbed his  feet  and  begged  for  his  for-

giveness;  then he cried, he really cried!. ‘I can’t accept this reality. It’s  too much  and

it is hard  to  believe  that you’re doing this.’he uttered. I won’t forgive myself. I  don’t   

deserve him.

    Time passed, and I live with this guilt inside me.  I think that I should go, as I  sense

that things are not as it used to be. I felt regretful and I don’t know how to redeem  my-

self. I’m a failure and I smeared my own reputation. I hate myself and what  makes  me

feel worse is….. he forgave me.

                                                ends

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