Perpetual struggle

As I look back into the past
past all those innocent indiscretions
yet possessed my unified self
self which once concealed from realism
realism is what that we see
without possibilities just as concrete
as the stars in the sky
we can touch and see it
but can we mold our conceptions
and create idealism
can we open Pandora's box and perceive hope
idealism is comical parody
comical by virtue of its faults
makes me feel like the world has karmic order
order which is abundant of chaos
chaos which dwindles by soul
soul which shattered into minute particles
particles which have the innate purpose to unite
Unity is what we wish to achieve
unity in our souls, in our thoughts, in our purpose
to have purpose is to have a breath
for live can only exist on true motive
motive that nourishes the soul
yet how is that this soul of mine forgets to assemble
the pieces that forge my existence and confidence
shall there be a perpetual struggle to make ends meet
one side of the bridges holds my present other holds my expectations
how do I connect what seems so broken
yet there was a time I was my expectations
this relapse of confusion can only be mended
with my mighty heart which must gain resilience
resilience by which I shall gain all that is lost.