A Little Something

"Hello," said the elf, stepping out from the box in which he was encased.

"What the--?!" said a stunned Rodney. He had just unwrapped the mysterious package left by his fireplace. "Who--? What are you?"

"The outfit isn't giving me away? I'm an elf, Einstein," replied the elf. "Name's Merv. Nice to meet ya, bud!"

"Is this a joke?" asked Rodney, as he fell into his Barcalounger.

"No joke, bud," said Merv, walking up to Rodney. "Remember that little wish you mentioned to the jolly guy in the red suit?"

"You mean at the holiday party?"

"That's the one," Merv said, as he surveyed the room. "Say, ever heard of the concept of cleaning?"

"But, I'm Jewish," said Rodney. "I don't believe in Santa Claus. I didn't want to be a killjoy when it was my turn to sit on his lap so I told him I just wanted a little something. I didn't think of any of it."

Merv smiled at Rodney, "Well, there you have it. You got yourself a little something. That fat bastard has taken to being so literal these days."

"But, why you?" asked Rodney. "He could've given me any one of a thousand other little somethings. Why the hell did he give me an elf?"

Merv sighed. "Well, technically, I've been laid off. These are tough times, bud, what with Amazon.com ruining things for whacked out philanthropists like crazy old Kringle. He had to reduce his workforce to get out of the red. So, he thought he could hit two birds with one stone--he cuts his staff while granting wishes. There's a twisted brilliance to it actually."

Rodney shook his head. "Why, oh, why didn't I just ask for money..."

"Too predictable," Merv said. "Man, I hope you have cable."



First Place for 12/15/07 Daily Flash Fiction Contest
Prompt: You wake up Christmas morning and there is a large present under the tree for your from Santa, but there's been accident, someone accidentally wrapped up and elf. What happens next?
Word Count: 298