Kelly's Kids

Kelly woke again from the same dream. It wasn’t really a dream; it was definitely a nightmare. In this recurring nightmare, which had been waking her occasionally for many years, but more often lately, Evan was only six. He’d begged her to let him walk down the street to Brandon’s house, by himself, and she’d finally consented. Less than a minute after she’d let him leave the house, she decided to walk down to Brandon’s house, just to see that he made it okay. As she walked down the street, hoping he wouldn’t be too embarrassed that she was checking up on him, she heard the sound of tires screeching, and looked up to see Evan’s small body tossed up into the air. He landed on the hard pavement with a sound that could only be described as the sound of death. She ran the thirty yards to the accident scene to find Evan, bloody and lifeless, but still warm and pink, as if he were only sleeping. He had no pulse, and was not breathing. She held him in her arms, screaming as if she were being devoured. At this point in the nightmare, she always woke up. Each time it felt so real, she cried, feeling the stabbing pain of loss in her chest, in her soul, even as her mind realized it was not real. Her husband, Andy, had long ago become accustomed to these nighttime outbursts, and held her tightly, smoothed her hair, and comforted her while she slowly calmed down and went back to sleep.

Evan was now seventeen, a young man, struggling for independence from a mother still struggling to let go. He had always been the perfect child. Polite, pleasant, hard-working, responsible. Yet she’d always been overcautious, overprotective, overeverything. The nightmare which invaded her sleep had driven her behavior from the first terrifying night. Life went on day to day, but she’d never shaken the dread and fear which covered her like a heavy, cold, wet blanket from that moment. But as day after day, and year after year went by with only minor accidents and no major tragedies, the frequency of the dream had lessened to the point that only rarely was her sleep interrupted. Until last month.

Two nights after Evan’s seventeenth birthday, he’d announced he wanted to go to college in California. He wanted to study marine biology, and there just weren’t any schools close by that offered that kind of program. She sat in stunned silence, feeling the terror rising up in her chest, unable to speak or breathe. Andy, always the practical one, spoke up about the extra cost of living on the West Coast, and reminded Evan that all their college calculations had assumed he would attend a state university. If Evan wanted to go anywhere else, he would have to subsidize the cost with student loans, scholarships, and work. Still Kelly couldn’t speak. The thought of Evan so far away was impossible to accept. She couldn’t comprehend everyday life without Evan, and the only way she’d been able to accept him going away to college was that he could come home on the weekends. And where did Marine Biology come from? He’d never mentioned anything but engineering. But he insisted that he’d made up his mind, and left to meet friends for a movie.

That night, after hours of tossing and turning, unable to clear her head, she’d finally fallen into a fitful sleep, and the opportunistic nightmare arrived shortly after, in vivid detail. Evan, clearly only six years old, broken, bleeding, and perfectly dead. Gone forever. The scream that rose from her sleeping body should have woken everyone in the neighborhood. Andy sat upright in the bed, dazed with sleep. When he understood what had happened, he gently cradled her in his arms. But this time, sleep would not return. She spent the rest of the long night awake, trying to calm her anxiety over the dream, but more from the realization that her Evan, her reason for living, was soon to leave her.

When Evan was born, Kelly and Andy had agreed that they would have more children. Evan needed siblings. He shouldn’t grow up without a brother or sister. But for no discernable medical reason, there were no more babies. Kelly often wondered how their lives would have been different if there’d been more children. Her life was certainly full and happy. Evan had filled her heart with joy from the first moment she saw him. She’d happily contented herself with his constant care and nurturing. He’d been a precious baby, a well-mannered child, and was now a pleasant, interesting, caring teenager. She’d often marveled at how unlike other teenagers Evan was. He’d never been mouthy or sullen. He was remarkably mature for his age, with a sophisticated sense of humor. She’d read that ‘only’ children often seem more mature because they spend so much time with their parents, listening to their conversations and observing their interactions. This was probably true for their family. She never remembered Evan going off to play by himself. He was always where she was.

When Andy started traveling with his job, she and Evan had spent even more time together. Kelly had been responsible for getting Evan to every soccer practice, every music lesson, every school function, every play date. She really had no life outside of Evan. Evan was her life. Even her conversations with Andy centered around Evan - his activities, his friends, his grades, his achievements. So, you didn’t have to be a trained psychologist to figure out why she was taking his announcement so hard. How could she just stop being a fulltime mom, when that’s all she’d done for the last seventeen years?
She felt discarded, unneeded, worthless, like an umbrella with a broken spoke.

The next day after Evan’s announcement, he woke up around ten and headed to the kitchen. When Kelly heard him get up, she headed to the kitchen to make his breakfast. He was shirtless, wearing only gym shorts, and was bending over getting eggs out of the refrigerator. She watched him gathering food, retrieving a pan from the cabinet under the stove, and a bowl for mixing his eggs. How had he grown up right before her eyes? He was tall like his father, lean and muscular, and graceful in his movements. He began cracking the eggs in the bowl, and whisking them together with milk. He caught sight of her, and turned around quickly. “Hey Mom, you want some eggs?”

She had been about to offer to take over for him, but decided she should let him continue. “Sure, throw a couple more in there,” she said. He was going to have to take care of himself soon, so he’d need to know how to feed himself. She looked over at him, and he was expertly cracking the eggs on the side of the bowl. He put the shells back in the carton, then carried them over and dropped them in the garbage disposal, like she always did. He whisked the eggs together with the others, and poured them in the sizzling pan.

She watched him with as much awe as if he were performing heart surgery. “Where did you learn to cook eggs?” she asked.

“I watched you,” he said, turning around from the stove and flashing a huge grin at her. He turned back around, turning the eggs with a spatula, then sprinkling them with grated cheese. Just like she always did.

Unable to stay still any longer, she went over to the breadbox and grabbed two pieces of bread and popped them into the toaster. Then she started peeling an orange and sectioning it, placing the sections on a plate. She started to get plates out when he said, “Mom, why don’t you let me serve you this time? Just sit down at the bar and wait to be impressed.” He flashed that grin again, and she saw a quick glimpse of what she felt Evan would look like as a man. Sparkling eyes, strong jaw, a sweetness she knew would stay with him into his old age. She blinked hard to keep tears from springing up in her eyes.

Kelly sat down, watching his movements with a sense of pride, but also sadness. How many mornings had she stood at the stove while he sat at the bar while she made breakfast? He really had been watching her while she cooked. He slid the eggs out of the pan onto two plates, grabbed the toast from the toaster, and sat the plates on the bar, while taking knives, forks, and napkins from the drawer. He sat down beside her, and waited for her to start eating. She took a bite, then another. “Excellent,” she said.

He grinned, and said, “Thanks. I learned from the master.” Then he started eating, wolfing down the eggs and toast, then stuffing an orange section in his mouth. He turned his head away from her for a second, then turned back facing her with the orange slice arranged horizontally over his teeth, showing through his lips, like a huge grinning maniacal clown. She laughed at him, relieved to know that this man-child who used to be her baby Evan was still, indeed, part child. By the time she finished her eggs and toast, he’d already cleaned the pan, and placed all the dishes in the dishwasher, and ground the eggshells and orange peels in the garbage disposal. He took her plate and silverware and put them in the dishwasher, and wiped off the countertop.

Evan finished tidying up the kitchen, just like she always did, and came back over and sat down at the bar. He looked over at her with an expression that chilled her heart because it was so serious. It seemed so out of place on his young face, although she knew he’d obviously been thinking very serious thoughts lately. He broke the silence. “Mom, I need your help.”

Kelly just looked at him, wondering what else this man-boy was going to drop in her lap. Evan looked sad, serious, and worried - all things she had hoped he’d never feel, but knew she couldn’t protect him from indefinitely. She looked him in the eyes and said, “Whatever you need, just tell me.”

“Well, you know Robby?”

“Yeah, I know Robby.” Robby was Evan’s friend who Kelly worried about the most. Not a good student, no dad around, mom works, didn’t attend church, not into sports, just not into anything, it seemed. She’d often wondered what Robby and Evan had in common and why they’d become friends at all. But Robby wasn’t a bad kid, or a trouble-maker, or disrespectful or anything that should worry her. He just wasn’t like Evan.

“Well, Robby has a little brother, Benjy. Benjy’s not a good reader, and I’ve been tutoring him, kind of unofficially, if you know what I mean.”

Kelly knew that he meant - for free. A wave of pride washed over her when she realized that her sweet Evan had allocated some of his time, in the midst of basketball, track, student council, all the stuff he’d signed on for, to help someone. She knew he spent a lot of time with Robby, but she didn’t know anything about him helping Robby’s brother.

“I’ve got ACT prep coming up, and I’m on the debate team this year, and I’ve got my work study three afternoons a week when school starts, and I just don’t think I’m going to be able to fit it all in this year.”

Kelly looked at him, wondering what it was exactly he was hoping to resolve. Did he need her advice regarding what he needed to drop? Which activity was least important with college admission boards? Evan was starting his senior year in two weeks, and he’d never dropped out of anything he’d signed on for. He’d never managed to overallocate himself, and always pulled through with good grades. So what was going on now?

“I know you’ve got a lot on your plate. You always have. Are you worried you won’t be able to do it all?”

“I can’t do it all. I’ve bitten off too much this time. I know I’m not officially obligated to tutor Benjy, but I can’t just leave him hanging, either. I don’t want him to slide back, and give up.”

“So what’s your game plan?”

“I want you to do it. I know you can do a better job than me. He needs someone, and I think you are perfect for the job. Now that I have a car and a license, you don’t have to chauffeur me around anymore. So you’ll have plenty of time to work with Benjy. What do you think?”

Kelly stared at him, wondering when he’d hatched this idea. He’d clearly spent some time thinking it through, and he’d made a compelling argument. He was absolutely right. She hadn’t been taking him from point A to point B for six months now. And how much cleaning, cooking, and grocery shopping can one person do in a day? The idea filled her with excitement as well as fear. How would she be with someone else’s child?

“Before I say yes, I need to ask a few questions. How old is Benjy?”

“He’s twelve. Going into seventh grade.”

“Where are you tutoring him?”

“We usually meet at the library. I’ve tutored him at his house a few times, but that’s not the best place.” Evan dropped his eyes for a second, and Kelly could tell there was more to be said about that.

“What problems does Benjy have besides reading?”

“Well, I guess he has a few problems. His mom works all the time, but still they don’t have much money. She smokes, and Robby has allergies, so he doesn’t stay home much because it makes him feel sick. He feels like the other kids at school think he’s stupid because he doesn’t read well. He’s getting a lot better, but it’s still not enough. He’s kind of a wreck. Robby takes care of him mostly. Makes sure he gets fed and showers and eats, stuff like that.”

“Sounds like it things are kind of a mess for Benjy. Do you think he’ll be okay with me tutoring him instead of you?”

“Well, I don’t know. I wanted to ask you before I said anything to him. Will you do it?”

“I’m not making a commitment yet. Why don’t you invite Robby and Benjy for dinner this weekend when your Dad’s home. I want to get his advice on it before I make a decision. How’s that?”

“Fair enough. I’ll invite them Saturday. Can we grill hamburgers?”

“You got it. I’ll make brownies for dessert.”

“Why don’t I make the brownies? I’ve watched you make those a thousand times. Looks easy.”

“Easy, huh? Knock yourself out, Chef Evan.”

“Great! I’ll call Robby right now. Thanks, Mom. You’re the best!” With that, Evan bolted out of the room. It reminded Kelly of when they’d told him he could have a puppy when he was ten years old. She knew she couldn’t deny him this request, so pure in motive. She marveled at his sweet spirit and kind heart, understanding what a gift from God he was and how little she’d actually contributed to his goodness. How blessed their family was to be so filled with good fortune. No sickness, no loss, just love. But how different was Robby and Benjy’s home. No Dad, most of the time no Mom, and little money - all together a sure recipe for adolescent problems. Add to that what might be a learning disability at worst, or a child allowed to fall behind at best, and she could definitely have her hands full with Benjy. She would see.

When Saturday came, she and Andy went to the grocery together to gather all the provisions for the night’s meal. As mundane as this seemed, it had been a tradition for most of their married life. They always went grocery shopping together. It seemed to mean even more to her since Andy had been traveling so much. The simple act of checking the pantry and the fridge, then making a list, and shopping together seemed to ground them, and remind them that they were still a team, even though they had to do so much apart. Kelly knew that others might find this strange, but to her it was an opportunity to spend time with her husband and, after almost twenty years of marriage, she still looked forward to Saturday and roaming through frozen foods, produce, and dairy with her mate.

Once they’d returned with their goods, Andy honked the horn for Evan to come out to the garage and help bring in the groceries. Evan could carry the whole load of bags in one trip, where it would take Kelly four trips from the garage to the kitchen. Another reason she would miss him. That sick feeling of dread settled in her stomach again, even though she’d told herself she would have none of that today. Today was a special day, and she didn’t want anything to mess it up. Evan’s friends were coming to dinner, and she wanted everything to be perfect. The door flew open as she and Andy started gathering bags from the hatch of the minivan. Evan bolted through the door into the garage and said, “Did you get the brownie mix?”

Andy laughed and said, “Brownie mix and enough ground round to feed the Third Battalion.”

“Mom, should I make the brownies now, or wait till later?”

“Oh, wait till right before dinner. They’re better if they’re still warm.”

Evan started grabbing the bags, and managed to carry everything in except what Kelly and Andy had already taken. They all headed to the kitchen and started putting things away. It was such a familiar Saturday morning family moment. So routine and mundane, but so wonderful. She felt that feeling again, the sick feeling, and willed herself to stop. She would have to get used to not having Evan around all the time, but she needed to enjoy these times while they lasted. She just wondered how other moms coped with their children leaving the nest. Most everyone she talked to complained all the time about their kids - messy, lazy, disrespectful, loud, or sullen and uncommunicative. Evan was none of those things. She got the impression that most of the parents she knew where looking forward to getting their lives back. She had no life outside of Evan and Andy.

She busied herself the rest of the day doing her usual Saturday chores. She handled Andy’s clothing from his week of travel, sorting out the dry cleaning articles from the washables, and started a load of laundry, and put the shirts in one laundry bag and the dry cleaning items in another. The cleaners pick up on Tuesday and drop off on Friday afternoon. Then she unwrapped the cleaning dropped off yesterday, and inspected the starched shirts to see if anything needed to be repressed. She hung the two suits that came back along with the two pairs of khaki trousers in the front of Andy’s closets with the four shirts, and selected four pairs of black socks from the sock drawer. She enjoyed packing her husbands things, even though he’d told her many times she didn’t need to do this for him. She wanted to do it. It made her feel like part of her was going with him each week. She checked his toiletries to make sure he wasn’t low on toothpaste or deodorant or blades for his razor, then closed the case until tomorrow when she would carefully place the clean clothes inside.

Once the task was finished she went back in the kitchen to mix the ground round together with Worchestershire sauce, salt and pepper. She mixed it all together in a large bowl, covered it with foil, and placed it in the refrigerator until it was time to pat out the burgers. Evan had watched her carefully, following her movements in the kitchen and asking questions like a chef in training. Kelly had no doubt that he would be able to
handle this task next time they had burgers. He was more animated that usual, and she knew he was very excited about his friends coming over. Robby had been over to their house many times, but she didn’t think he’d ever eaten with them. But several of his friends had been at their house at dinnertime and stayed to eat with them, and Evan had never seemed this excited, almost nervous.

The rest of the afternoon went by uneventfully, and at 6:15 the doorbell rang. As if out of nowhere, Evan appeared to answer the door. Kelly walked into the foyer from the kitchen, and was immediately struck by the smallness of the boy who must be Benjy, Robby’s brother. He was short, skinny and sloppy. Baggy shorts, huge t-shirt, long hair in his eyes. It seemed to her that he could just disappear under his clothes, and his hair hid whatever his eyes might have to say. Evan said, “Hey Mom. You remember Robby?”

Robby smiled shyly at her and said, “Hey, Mrs. Brandt. Thanks for having us.”

Evan grabbed Benjy in headlock, gave him a couple of knocks on the head and said, “And this is Benjy. I hope you made enough burgers, ‘cause this guy can put the food away!”

“Hi, Benjy. I’m glad you could come. Don’t worry, there’s enough food for an army. Why don’t you guys come on in. Andy’s on the deck getting the grill ready. I want him to meet you.” They walked through the living room to the back door, and Kelly watched Benjy, who was looking around their house like he was in a museum. Kelly remembered what Evan had said about Robby’s house not being a good place, and wondered what sort of world these boys lived in. She was so grateful for their lifestyle, and knew that they lived in a very safe and pleasant world. They all went out the back door to the deck, where Andy was wearing the apron she’d gotten him years ago that said “Kiss the Cook.” As she always did, she walked up and kissed him on the cheek, hoping it wouldn’t embarrass Evan too much.

Evan spoke up this time, and introduced them. “Dad, you remember Robby, right?”

Andy nodded, and stuck out his hand. “Sure I remember Robby. He beat me unmercifully in poker a few months ago. I don’t think I’ll forget that anytime soon. I’ll be sure to burn your burger.” Andy laughed his evil laugh, and slapped Robby on the back.

Evan looked at Benjy and said, “He’s kidding. No one has to eat a burned burger.” Then he said, “Dad, this is Benjy. Benjy, this is my dad, Andy. He is a master grill cook, and a not so good poker player.”

Andy stuck out his hand to shake Benjy’s hand, and said “Welcome to our home. And I was kidding. I won’t make Robby eat a burned burger, but he won’t know if I dropped his on the ground.”

Evan shook his head and said to Benjy, “He’s just kidding. He always does that.”

Kelly had been watching Benjy, and she’d never seen a boy look more uncomfortable. She wanted him to feel at ease here, because if she tutored him, it would be better if they worked here instead of at the library. She wondered how long it would take to get to know him, figure out what his weaknesses were and how to help him. She could already feel herself making a warm space for him in her heart. He just looked like he needed someone. He seemed so shy, but maybe it was because they’d just met. She knew twelve year olds were probably at the most awkward stage of development, and he obviously hadn’t been taught much about manners and social situations. Evan had been everywhere with them, and had learned to converse with adults very early. She reminded herself that most kids weren’t like Evan. But she was up for the challenge. And Evan needed her to do this. But it may be harder than she thought.

Evan took Robby and Benjy to his room while Andy was finishing the burgers and Kelly was getting all the sides ready. She prepared a tray of lettuce, sliced tomatoes, onions, and pickles, and toasted the buns. She had made a fruit salad and baked beans earlier and the beans were in the warming oven. And Evan had put the brownies in the oven just before their guest arrived. When the timer went off, Kelly took the brownies out and put the pan on the rack to cool. The smell of the brownies filled the kitchen, competing with the wood smoke smell from the grill when Andy opened the door from the deck.

Andy brought in the first plate of burgers, and smiled at her the way he always does when he’s rather proud of himself. “Looks like a good batch. I’m starving. So what do you think of Benjy? He seems kind of shy.”

Kelly said, “Yeah, but I think he’ll warm up. Evan said his mom isn’t around much because she works all the time. He’s probably just not been around a lot of people, except at school.”

“I just don’t want you to be too hard on yourself if this doesn’t work out. I know you’ll do your best, just manage your expectations.”

“I know. Every child is different, and my only experience is with Evan. I just have to be patient and creative.”

Just then, like on a timer, Evan popped into the kitchen, followed by Robby and Benjy, and said, “Is dinner ready? Man it smells good in here!”

Andy said, “I think we’re ready to eat,” and took off his apron and hung it up on the back of the pantry door. “You guys sit where ever you want.” He placed the huge tray of burgers in the middle of the table. Kelly had already loaded the table with the fruit salad, beans, condiments, vegetables, and buns.

Kelly said, “I have tea, soft drinks, milk, water, and lemonade. Benjy, what would you like?” She noticed that he had sat between Robby and Evan.

Benjy looked kind of nervous, like he was being asked to talk in class, and quietly said, “Lemonade.”

After everyone had their drink of choice, Kelly sat down next to Andy, and placed her napkin in her lap. Andy took her hand in his left hand, and Evan’s hand in his right hand, and said, “Let’s say grace over this awesome meal. Kelly reached over to Robby and took his hand.

Evan looked over at Benjy and said, “This is what we do before we eat,” and grabbed Benjy’s hand. “Now you take Robby’s hand.” Benjy looked confused, but complied.

Andy bowed his head and said, “Dear Lord, we thank you this evening for your many blessings, for this beautiful day, for this excellent dinner, but especially for Benjy and Robby who are with us tonight. Thank you Lord for the gift of their friendship. Please bless them, and bless this meal, and bless our coming together tonight. In Jesus’ holy name, Amen.”

When Kelly looked up from the prayer, she saw Benjy looking directly at her. He quickly looked down at his plate. He certainly was shy. She wondered how long it would take him to be comfortable with her. He seemed like a scared rabbit caught out away from his burrow. She knew that he trusted Evan, but that it would be a while before he trusted her. She’d have to be careful and go slowly.

She started passing the buns around first, then the burgers, and in no time, Evan and Robby had constructed towers of meat, lettuce, onions, tomato, and pickles. Benjy was keeping pace, and built a pretty impressive sandwich. Kelly tried not to watch him, and started passing around the beans and fruit salad. Once all the dishes had made their way around the table, everyone began happily eating. Evan was right about Benjy - he could pack away some groceries. She figured that he didn’t get an opportunity to eat this way often, or he wouldn’t be so thin. At least if they worked together here, she could furnish a good meal once a week or so. Good food always seemed to help break down barriers, and Benjy was looking more comfortable with every bite. Robby and Evan were talking with Andy about school, the classes they’d signed up for, and the football team, and Kelly was just sitting back watching, wondering if this is what it would have been like if they’d had more children.

When they’d all finished, Evan got up and started cutting the brownies into 3 inch square portions. He brought the pan over to the table while Kelly brought the dessert plates and clean forks. Then she took the half-gallon of ice cream from the freezer and said, “The brownies are still warm. Who wants ice cream on top?” Evan started transferring the brownies from the pan to plates, and Kelly placed a scoop of ice cream on each one. She served Benjy first, and he immediately started eating. She didn’t know how he could hold another bite, but he devoured the brownie and ice cream in about four bites. Kelly offered him another, but he said, “No, thanks.” She’d have to remember to make brownies again when he came over to work.

When all but two brownies had been consumed, the ice cream put away, and the remaining dinner stashed in the refrigerator, the boys went outside to shoot hoops. Kelly and Andy finished wiping down the countertops and the table. Andy said, “Well, he sure has an appetite. I didn’t know such a small kid could eat that much. He ate like he’d been starved!”

Kelly laughed and said, “I thought after he ate the second hamburger, he couldn’t possibly eat anything else. I guess he just doesn’t get fed like this very often.”

“Do you think he’s just nervous, or is he really that shy?”

“Oh, I think he’s shy, but he’ll warm up with a little TLC. And some more good food.”

Kelly looked out the kitchen window just as Benjy launched an impossible shot from across the driveway. The ball hit the rim, swirled around three times, and fell through the net. Evan swept Benjy up like a ragdoll, and carried him around the yard on his shoulders, screaming and cheering. Benjy’s face was lit up with an incredible grin from pure joy. He seemed to be transformed in that moment from a fragile, needy, scared little boy to a preview of what he might become. Kelly knew there was great potential in all God’s children, and felt blessed to have the opportunity to help Benjy reach that potential. In that moment, she imagined Benjy at Evan’s age - happy, confident, self-assured, and ready to take on the world. If she could be just a small part of that, maybe she could feel useful and needed. There was so much need for love and caring in the world, and she wouldn’t need to look very hard or go very far to find it.

Andy came up behind her and circled his arms around her waist. He kissed the back of her neck, and said, “I’m sure you’ve decided to help him. I can see the tenderness on your face. I’ll help you any way I can. You’ll do fine. You’ve done such a good job with Evan.”

The boys played basketball outside until well after dark, and around ten Robby and Benjy left to go home. Evan walked them out to Robby’s car, then came back in to the kitchen.

“So, will you do it?” he asked.

“How could I say no?”

“Mom, you are the greatest! You don’t know how much this means to me. Benjy just needs a little more help. You won’t regret it, Mom. I promise!”

With that, Evan jumped up and started out of the room, then stopped at the foot of the stairs and ran back in the room. He bounded over to her and hugged her so hard she thought her eyes would pop out. “Thanks, Mom. For everything. I love you so much.” Then he ran up the stairs two at a time, yelling, “I’ve got to call Robby!”

Kelly sat quietly for a while, feeling anxious yet exhilarated. What did she know about tutoring? She’d never been a teacher. But she had taught Evan to read before he started school. She’d read to him constantly when he was a baby, showing him the pictures, reading to him using different voices, making reading a stimulating, pleasant experience. She was convinced that the time she’d spent reading to him had had a profound affect on his cognitive development. As he got older, and she had first started teaching him letters, then small words, it seemed like in a very short time he had started recognizing words, then sounding them out, then reading whole sentences back to her. Maybe she could help Benjy learn to read at grade level but, more importantly, gain a love of reading that would open up the world to him. She had to first get an understanding of where Benjy was and where he needed to be. She’d spend their first session just getting a baseline of his reading skills, then work on a plan. She had just a couple of weeks before school started, and knew it was probably unrealistic to think she could make progress in such a short time. But it couldn’t hurt to try. So she planned to start that Monday. She would arrange to pick him up so she could see where he lived. They’d come back to her house, and work for an hour. That would be a good start. She’d go to the library and get an assortment of books at different grade levels, and try to assess Benjy’s reading skills. Reading aloud was probably not a pleasant experience for him, but it was the only way she knew to properly assess his skills.

Andy came downstairs in his pajamas and said, “Aren’t you coming to bed?”

Kelly looked at the clock on the mantel, and realized it was almost midnight. How long had she been sitting there just thinking? She said, “I’m coming,” and turned off the lights. As she headed up the stairs, she felt anxious, exhilarated, and very content.

On Monday, as planned, she arrived at Benjy’s house to pick him up at ten AM. She pulled up in front of the house, and noticed that an older model gray sedan was in the drive. As Kelly was getting out of her car, a woman walked out the front door of the house and headed toward the sedan. Kelly assumed this was Benjy’s mom, and hadn’t expected her to be home. She quickly closed her car door and said, “Excuse me, are you Robby and Benjy’s mom?”

“Yeah. Who are you?”

“Hi, I’m Kelly Brandt, Evan’s mom. I’m happy to finally meet you.”

Benjy’s mom just looked at her, making no pretense about the fact that she was sizing her up, taking in the car, eyeing her clothes, assessing her in a most obvious fashion. She said, “Yeah, I’ve seen you before. I’m Donna. Donna Taylor. I don’t mean to be rude, but I’m late for work again. Benjy didn’t say nothing about being tutored. What are you tutoring him for?”

“My son Evan has been helping Benjy with his reading, but he’s not going to have time to continue after school starts. So he asked me to help. So we’re getting started today.”

“Well, Benjy, he can be a real handful. He don’t listen or pay attention. So good luck.”

“Thanks. I’ll remember that.”

Donna jumped in the gray sedan, and after the third attempt to start the car, finally kept it running and backed out of the drive without another look or a wave. Kelly had been struck by how old Donna had looked. She had assumed Donna was one of those young moms who had her first while she was a teenager, but she looked to be in her forties. But more than anything, she had looked tired. Starting her day in a hurry, running late, and already tired with a long day ahead of her. She hadn’t asked Evan what kind of job Benjy’s mom had, but from the looks of her clothes, it was not an office job.